


Birdland: Five years later

by Ischa



Series: Birdland [3]
Category: Batman (Comics), Batman (Movies - Nolan), Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe - Magical Realism, Birds, Brothers, Canon-Typical Violence, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Families of Choice, First Time, Gen, M/M, Polyamory, Sex Pollen, Sex Toys, Shower Sex, Threesome, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-26
Updated: 2014-02-06
Packaged: 2017-12-09 14:04:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 23
Words: 44,997
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/775044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ischa/pseuds/Ischa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Shorts and snippets five years from the events of Birdland.</p><p>
  <i>“Want me to tell you a story?” He asks.</i>
  <br/>
  <i>“Yeah, something with a happy ending,” Tim whispers.</i>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Nestraub

**Author's Note:**

> This is a series of one-shots so far and I decided that I am taking prompts for this. So, if you want to know something about their future, ask about it in a comment. :) 
> 
> Beta by Icalynn <3

**Nestraub**    
 _(which means stealing fledglings from their nest. I don't know if there is a word for it in English, my dictionary came up with nothing, as did the internet...)_

Dick never thought in a million years that he would have to deal with this one day. The way Bruce looms over him tells Dick that he never thought of that possibility either.

“Mister Drake,” Bruce says and steps a bit aside. Alfred had let the man in, so he must have a case here, but Dick just wants him gone already.

“Mister Wayne,” Mister Drake says with a nod and a look in Dick’s direction. Dick crosses his arms over his chest. He is feeling defensive and he doesn’t care that it shows. He’s never been as good in suppressing his feelings as say: Tim.

“Alfred informs me you want to speak with me about Tim,” Bruce replies.

Mister Drake nods, “It’s a private matter.”

“I’m not leaving,” Dick cuts in and Mister Drake gives him another look. Dick ignores it. He’s not leaving.

“Dick-”

“No,” Dick says sharply. “You’ll have to drag me out of here and tie me down. I want to see you try to make me leave.”

“Take a seat Mister Drake. It seems my son, Richard, isn’t leaving and as he was the one who found Tim in the first place, I’m not blaming him,” Bruce says. 

Technically it's not true as Jason has found Tim, but whatever, Dick thinks.  
Mister Drake nods and sits down. “I know this must be difficult for you, for all of you, but Tim is my son and I want him back.”

“After eight years?” Dick cuts in sharply and Bruce lets him, leaning back in his chair as he observes their interaction.

“I don’t think you understand-”

“Yeah, you know what? I am not doing this. He is mine. He is ours. I raised him and from what I hear you weren’t the greatest dad even before you were taken,” Dick interrupts.

Mister Drake’s eyes narrow for a second before he nods. “We had our difficulties. He is special.”

“No shit!”

“Language,” Bruce says gently.

Dick takes a deep breath. “He’s nearly eighteen. In a few months he’ll legally be an adult, why do you want to take him away from his family?” 

“I am his family!” Mister Drake says. “By blood. He is my blood.”

“Family has nothing to do with blood-”

“And everything to do with love,” Tim cuts in. He’s standing in the door to the library, his knuckles a bit white from his hard grip on the frame.

“I thought you were out with John,” Dick says.

“I forgot my- it doesn’t matter.”

“This wasn’t planned or an appointment,” Bruce says.

“I know. I know your schedule better than you, Bruce,” Tim replies.

Mister Drake looks from Dick to Tim and Dick realizes he doesn’t recognize his son. There aren’t many pictures of Tim. He hunts them down and deletes them as soon as he can. Dick wonders how Mister Drake found Tim in the first place.

“My son, Tim,” Bruce says.  
Dick doesn’t miss the possessive note in his voice. It makes him smile inside.

“Tim,” Mister Drake echoes.

“Mister Drake,” Tim replies.

Dick winces – only a bit and on the inside, because Mister Drake is essentially a stranger to Tim. Tim lost his parents when he wasn’t even ten.

“Tim. I’m here to take you home.” Mister Drake gets up and takes a step closer.

“I am home,” Tim replies, his body is rigid. He still doesn’t like being around strangers, humans, much. Except for when he’s Robin. His personal space bubble is enormous and only a lucky few are allowed in.  

“These people don’t know you like I do. I watched you-”

“I am home,” Tim interrupts.

And suddenly everything makes sense in Dick’s head. Tim has always known that his dad is human, knew that his mom was one of the bird-people. And he must have changed to bird-form sometime after he had been born. His dad didn’t take it well. That much is obvious.

“Tim, you know you can’t stay here, you can’t hide forever. You are different, you have special needs. You aren’t-”

“If you say human, I am going to punch you, Mister Drake,” Bruce cuts in. His voice like steel.

“I don’t hide. I don’t have to, because these people are my family, they love me. They don’t care that I turn into a bird now and then,” Tim says. His grip on the door-frame is loosening. He takes a shallow breath, so no one could see he’s trying to get back his control. No one except his family.  
But they’re all freaks anyway.  
Mister Drake is clearly trying to come up with something when John storms in.

“I thought you said you would just go up into your room _real quick_! And now I find you here with Bruce and Dick. Jason is going to kill us if we’re late again-” John says, pushing a cookie at Tim. “Eat that on the way out. Hi Bruce, hi Dick! Uhm…hi unknown Mister! Come on!” John says, tugging at Tim.

“John-” Bruce says.

“I know, I know. No jokes about Jason killing anyone, but we are really late. Talk later?”

“John…”

“No, it’s fine. We are late and Jason might throw something sharp and deadly at us,” Tim smiles.

“Make sure to repay that in kind,” Dick grins.

John pulls again. “Come on.”

“Later,” Tim says and lets John drag him out.

“We will fight with tooth and nail and all the lawyers Bruce can pay for,” Dick says as soon as he hears the front door shut with a bang. Poor Alfred.

“I can pay for a few,” Bruce throws in, mildly amused.

Mister Drake nods, but John doesn’t think he’s going to give up just now. 

~+~  
Dick finds Tim that night in the library. He’s curled up in one of the big leather armchairs.

“So, that was your dad and you were born human,” Dick says.

Tim nods. “I didn’t remember. But it makes sense that he freaked out and – I don’t know if he left us.”

Dick doesn’t tell him that he could easily find out what happened, but that he never even tried. Maybe some part of Tim knew deep down the whole time. “Scoot over,” he says instead and Tim does.

Tim is still small, but it’s a bit of a challenge to get them both comfortable in the chair. Dick’s arms are around Tim’s thin ribcage and his chin on Tim’s shoulder. “Want me to tell you a story?” He asks.

“Yeah, something with a happy ending,” Tim whispers.

Dick reaches over and grabs one of the chocolate bars they keep stashed everywhere for occasions like this. He hands it to Tim who nods a thanks.

“Once upon a time there was a lonely baby bird whose parents died,” Dick begins.

“I know that story,” Tim says.

“It’s a great one, full of adventure and love and an awesome happy ending,” Dick replies.

“Tell me the ending first,” Tim says, taking a bite from his chocolate bar.

“And they lived happily ever after in a big house with lots of delicious chocolate and worm-salad.” 


	2. Paarungszeit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's a holiday today, so have Jason/Dick sex-pollen porn. \o/  

**Paarungszeit**  
 _(mating season)_

Jason is having one of those nights.  
He really tries not to kick too hard, not to punch too hard, not to _kill_ anybody, but the scum of Gotham isn’t having any of that. The stupidity seems endless. It’s not like he’s an unknown variable in Gotham’s underground. They have to know he’s not fucking around when he draws the gun.  
He’s feared, sometimes he thinks, even more than the Batman, but that could be wishful thinking. 

“It’s the voice,” Dick says, swinging down and landing smoothly next to him. 

“How long were you watching?” Jason asks, lighting a cigarette. 

“Don’t you know?” 

“I was brooding, it took all my concentration,” Jason answers easily. 

“You should take lessons from B- Batman,” Dick replies. 

“I took more than I should, if you ask him.”  
Dick leans slightly into Jason’s space. There had been a time when he was growing up when he may have been a little in love with Dick. And if he wasn’t with Bruce and John, he would try to hit that hard. 

“He still loves you,” Dick says, Jason can feel his warmth and his breath against his skin. He takes another deep drag to keep himself from…something. Doing something incredibly stupid. There’s an itch under his skin the whole night and he wants it badly to be scratched. 

“What are you doing here anyway, except indulging in your voyeuristic tendencies?” 

Dick laughs and it sounds too loud and foreign in this part of town. Shady and dark as it is. “Everyone needs a hobby.”

“Yours is clearly hunting scum – in New York.” 

“Just visiting.”

“You worried about Robin?” Jason asks, because he’s heard about Mister Drake trying to take away what is theirs. Maybe that’s why he’s itching for a fight so badly, or a really good fuck. 

“I’m worried about all of you,” Dick answers. 

“There is no way he’s going to leave.” 

“I know.” 

“Let’s take your mind off of this,” Jason says, throwing his butt over the edge of the rooftop they're standing on. “I bet there is a nice mugging going down somewhere near by.” 

“You say the sweetest things,” Dick laughs and jumps without a warning. Jason shakes his head. Fearless fucker.  
   
~+~  
“Okay,” Dick says.  
He’s visibly trying to stay calm. All Jason wants to do is shut him up and kiss him, suck his dick, press him against the nearest wall and fuck him senseless. Or let Dick fuck him senseless. 

“Dick.”

“We should call Bruce,” Dick says, pressing himself into the brick wall behind him. 

“Bruce and the boys are out of the country. We could call Alfred,” Jason replies. 

“No, and I know that they are out of the freaking country Jason,” Dick says, running a hand over his face and he moans. 

Jason’s resolve not to jump his bones is crumbling like a cookie in a child’s hand. “Bruce has an antidote to nearly anything,” he says. 

“Yeah, okay. Let’s go back to the manor – I mean cave. Let’s go back to the cave and take every single one of them-” he stops. “He made them for humans.” 

“Yes,” Jason replies. They do work on him and John okay. Not as fast, but they work. Bruce is still working on antidotes that their immune system doesn’t burn through. They need more of it than humans – trice as much. Jason isn't sure they have so much of it stocked. 

Dick closes his eyes. “Nearly anything. What if this is new, what if it’s not from Ivy’s batch –”

“What were you even thinking, running into a warehouse full of strange new drugs and-”

“I wasn’t the one who blew it up and exposed us to it!” Dick says.

“It seems to be harmless enough, just some stuff to get you going – all night long,” Jason grins.  

“This is not funny. I can feel it in my veins. I can’t think beyond how your lips would feel-” he shuts his mouth. 

“There are two possibilities here,” Jason says, but he is staring at Dick’s mouth and really, there is only one in his book. Consequences will be damned. “One, we go back to the manor and try to counteract it with some of the drugs Bruce has – not very safe. Two, we go back to the manor and fuck.” 

“I don’t-” Dick says. “I don’t _fuck_.”

Jason has been wondering about that, but never enough to ask Dick about if he has any sexual relationships or even desires. Seems he doesn’t need to anymore.  
“The cave it is then,” Jason replies, because there is no way he is going to do what he wants when Dick isn’t 100% on board with it. “We can sit it out.” 

“Yeah,” Dick says. “I don’t want to be alone right now.” 

Jason can understand that. He doesn’t trust himself either not to jump some random great looking person’s bones. 

~+~  
It’s pretty much a lost cause. They make it past Alfred okay enough, but as soon as they reach their old room all bets are off. 

Dick is touching him. Carefully and softly and slowly, but his touches are growing bolder by the minute. “Dick-”

“You’ve done this a lot with John and Bruce – I know. I know you can take care of me,” Dick interrupts. 

“You should turn, you should turn and-”

“In my state? I will probably hurt myself or rape a _bird_ ,” Dick says. “Or both.”

Jason can’t help the laugh.  
Suddenly calling Bruce seems like a good idea, but it’s not like he can be here in ten anyway. It’s up to them to handle this situation as best as they can.  
“I will take care of you,” Jason says and his voice is way gentler than he’s used to. There’s no way in hell he’s going to play rough with Dick. Dick is not the type and besides Dick hasn’t let anyone touch him, no one human anyway for years. He’s still messed up from the time he has been tortured, he is just better at hiding it. Most of the time.  
Dick nods and leans in to kiss him. 

~+~  
Dick’s body is like Bruce’s covered in marks and scars and bruises. But most of Dick’s scars are from the time he had been held captive.  
Jason’s own body is nearly flawless. They heal faster and better than humans, in human form, – at least when it comes to normal wounds. And what Dick has been through hasn’t been normal. 

“You’re thinking too loud,” Dick says, tearing at Jason’s uniform. Jason lets him. Lets him be in control, lets him manhandle Jason to the bed they’ve been sharing since Dick came back. 

I was always a little bit in love with you, he wants to say, but doesn’t. “Do something about it then,” Jason replies and Dick falls to his knees. The sight alone could make Jason come on the spot, but this would be Dick taking care of him again. And he’s done that since he found Jason loitering around one winter afternoon. 

Jason lets Dick kiss his hipbone and lick his stomach and then urges him to get up again, gets them both completely naked and spreads him out on the soft sheets.  
The desperation he’s been feeling since they blew up the warehouse is still there, but it’s focused now on making Dick feel good with his hands and lips and tongue.  
Dick is beautiful in whatever form he chooses and he has to know that, has to feel it in his bones.  
“You are perfect,” he whispers kissing a trail from Dick’s lips over his chin and down, over his neck, his collarbone, dragging his lips over a nipple, and then further down over his stomach.  
Dick makes soft breathy noises that sound happy. Happy fucking laughter. Jason smiles against Dick’s skin. “Going to make you crazy,” he says, biting down gently and then kissing the sting away, sucking a bruise into Dick’s tight. Dick spreads his legs and Jason licks around his entrance. Dick chokes on something that could be his name. 

He’s tight and Jason would really love to fuck him, but he doesn’t think he should. Not with Dick being as affected by whatever they fucking bathed in as he is. Besides Dick doesn’t like pain, and Jason only wants pleasure for him. So he’s sticking to his tongue and one finger and a lot of lube. Keeping Dick on the edge and letting up a bit just to start it all over again. Dick’s fingers are fisted in the sheets, he’s sweating and whispering Jason’s name. 

“Jason,” he says. 

“Hmm?” He hums lazily against Dick’s ass and Dick makes another choked off noise as he comes.  
Jason sits up and looks at the mess he’s made. It’s the most beautiful thing ever.  

“Come here,” Dick whispers and Jason crawls up to him, lets Dick snuggle close and rub all over him. “Let me watch?” he asks. 

“Kinky fucker,” Jason answers and takes his cock in hand. 

~+~  
“I know you like it rough,” Dick says after as they’re sitting on the balcony railing naked. 

Jason exhales smoke and nods. “I like this a lot too.” But only because it is you, he thinks and hopes Dick gets it. 

Dick smiles. “How the hell are we going to explain this to Bruce and John?” he asks. 

Jason shrugs. “They’re vigilantes. They’ll understand.” It’s you, he thinks, they’ll understand.  
Dick leans into him and pets his head.


	3. Nesthäkchen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the first five years later story I wrote, actually. And it was because I was stalling the Jason/Bruce confrontation...

**Nesthäkchen**  
 _(which means ‘pet of the family’ but is also a bird-reference in German)_

“So, little wing,” Jason says. He’s perched on the edge of the rooftop as is Tim.

Tim doesn’t look at him, or acknowledge the pet-name. This is hard enough as it is and maybe he should’ve driven out to New York and talked to Dick.  
Jason takes out a cigarette and lights it, inhaling slowly. Waits. Bruce, Batman would have a heart-attack over his carelessness. And then another, because Tim didn’t even try to wrestle the thing away to keep their cover. This is just asking for trouble. Flares in the night.

“It’s personal,” Tim says, quietly. But it still sounds a bit bitten off. And that’s probably why he’s talking to Jason, or trying. Dick would have hugged him and make him share all of his feelings – as would John for that matter. Jason will most likely mock a bit, but it’ll be safe from all the extra attachment.

“I figured,” Jason replies and hands him a chocolate bar.

Tim takes it with a short nod of thanks. He never really outgrew loving chocolate, especially the cheap kind and Jason knows it. Shares it too.  
“I want to ask Miss Carrie out on a date,” Tim says looking at the City, their City.

“And when you say ‘date’, you mean you want to have sex with her,” Jason grins.

Tim nods, because that is true too. He takes a bite of his chocolate bar. “Not only.”

“I knew you were a freak, just like the rest of us,” Jason says.

Tim wants to say that Dick turned out alright, but Jason knows that, even Dick is hunting scum in New York wearing a mask, so…yeah, they are all a bit screwed up.  
“I’ve always liked her,” Tim says.

“Of course you did. She’s hot. Still, even with, what is she now? Thirty?”

“Yeah,” Tim answers.

“Do you want to tell her?”

“That’s vague. Do I want to tell her what? That I’ve liked her since I was fourteen? That I’m a vigilante, so our dates will always be cut a bit short? That I turn into a freaking bird?”

“Pick one? Pick all?”

“I don’t know. You’re lucky you hooked up with John and Bruce. They knew. They didn’t care,” Tim says.

Jason snorts. “It’s not like we don’t have other problems.”

Tim nods in acknowledgment. “Still, she’s so normal.”

“Except for the hair, and that she has the hots for you too.”

“I’m not fourteen anymore. It’s totally okay for her to have the hots for me. She would have never done anything about it, because she’s such a good person.”

“But you want to seduce her,” Jason says, flipping his cigarette butt over the rooftop and down into the dark alley.

“I am not a good person, Jason. You know that.”

“So, why are we even having this conversation, if your mind is made up?” Jason asks. “Because you’re not here so I’ll talk you out of it, if that were the case you would’ve gone to Dick. If you wanted a blessing you would’ve gone to John. He’s big on forgiveness, following your heart, and shit like that.”

“You love it,” Tim says, finishing his chocolate.

Jason nods. “Not the point.”

“I just wanted to tell someone, who gets me.” And hang out with you for a while, goes unsaid, but Jason knows that anyway.

“So, you did. Now go and beat some wannabe robber up, then go home, sleep, have breakfast and call that woman you are in love with,” Jason replies.

“Will you be there? At breakfast?” Tim asks.

“What is Alfred making?” Jason wants to know and it’s a good sign he didn’t ask if Bruce will be there. He probably knows Bruce’s schedule better than Bruce.

“If he knows you will be there, he’ll make your favorite, Jason, you know that,” he turns to look at Jason. The lenses are up, so they can’t see each other’s eyes, but they don’t need to. Their senses are so much more in tune with each other, so much more in any way possible. “You should be home more often.”

Jason shrugs. “I’m not promising anything,” he starts and then there’s a commotion in the alley and he grins.

Tim grins back. “After you,” he says and they jump.


	4. Turteltauben

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Tim and Miss Carrie... I really like Miss Carrie, and think she and Tim are lovely together, so there will be more of this.  
> Still taking prompts, guys and girls. Don't be shy.

**Turteltauben**  
 _(love-birds)_

~+~  
Miss Carrie is wearing the purple trench coat. Tim has had dreams about that trench coat and her in it and she wasn’t wearing anything underneath it in his dreams. It’s hard to breathe suddenly. He’s watching her, lurking around in the shadows, as she’s talking to Alfred. She has always been nice to Alfred and has never treated him like the help. She knows Alfred is family. 

“Ah, Master Timothy,” Alfred says suddenly, because he knows them, knows how to spot them. 

Miss Carrie turns around just as Tim steps out of the shadows. “Oh,” she says. “I think I’m underdressed.” 

Tim has a feeling she doesn’t know this would be a date. A real date. They’ve been going out for lunch and dinner and even breakfast for months now, years even, but she probably doesn’t realize that Tim has finally found the guts to ask her out. He isn’t good at this, so it’s probably his own fault.  
“You look perfect,” Tim says and she smiles, that full happy smile of hers. She is perfect, Tim thinks. He steps down to her and offers his arm which she takes without any hesitation. 

“Have a good evening Sir, Miss Carrie,” Alfred says. 

“Thank you Alfred,” Miss Carrie answers. 

Tim wants to say he shouldn’t wait up, but that would be futile. Alfred always does. So he only nods.  
   
~+~  
The restaurant is low-key and not super expensive. He could afford the most fancy in town, but he knows Miss Carrie prefers the simpler things and the food here is to die for.  
She takes off her purple trench coat and Tim tries hard not to stare. He doesn’t help her, she isn’t that kind of woman, but he sits down after she does. She is wearing a simple black dress and a necklace made of pink pearls. The cheaper kind, but they look good on her.  
They order and that is the easy part. They’ve done this before. The eating, the joking, and talking about everything and anything. They’ve done this since Tim was roughly fifteen and ventured out in real boy clothes. She took him for ice-cream. 

After they’re done eating and it’s getting late, he helps her into her trench coat, feeling the material for the first time, and offers his arm again.  
“You like this one,” she says, looking down at herself. 

Tim knows she means the trench coat. “Yes. It looks good on you.” 

She nods, there is a smile playing around her lips, like she knows what this thing does to him. But maybe it’s the nature of a woman’s trench coat to inspire sexual fantasies in any man.    
“This was a date, right?” Miss Carrie asks. 

“Yes. I thought I made it clear, but I’m not that good at…dating,” Tim answers. 

“It’s because you never dated, Tim,” Miss Carrie says seriously. Something about her tone, Tim thinks, he doesn’t like. 

“I have always wanted to date only you,” he replies before she can say something about him dating girls his age or whatever. He doesn’t want to date girls his age. He doesn’t want to date women her age.  
He only wants to date her. 

“Tim-”

“This is weird for you,” he realizes. 

“Yes, but not because you’re so much younger,” she says, he gives her a look, and she smiles, relents. “Okay, not only. But mostly because I dated Bruce, who is your dad. And-”

“Jason,” Tim cuts in. Even if it hadn’t been dating, she had slept with Jason. That one time, and Jason hadn’t been older than Tim is now. 

“Yes. I know he probably did it to spite Bruce, but still.” 

“He didn’t. He thinks you’re hot and beautiful and funny.” 

“I think that’s all you,” Miss Carrie teases. 

“I-” Tim pauses and stops in the middle of the sidewalk, tugs at her arm so she would look at him. “I want to date you. I want to be with you.” He doesn’t say he loves her, but he thinks she knows anyway. 

“You’ve never dated another girl, Tim.”

“Because I know it’s you for me.”

“You can’t possibly know that Tim. Not now. Not ever. No one knows that.” 

“I do,” Tim says, because he does know. That’s how their people love and live. He can’t tell her now. Not in the middle of the street, but he will explain one day if she gives him the chance. 

She sighs. “There are things you’re not telling me.”

“Yes,” Tim replies. 

“Why?” 

“Because I think you would freak out and you’re already searching for reasons to-”

“I’m not searching, Tim. There are reasons to not get involved.” 

“We are already involved, Carrie,” Tim says, his fingers tightening around her arm a bit. He knew it would be hard. He knows it will be hard, but he’s stubborn and she is his special person. He steps closer to her, feeling her breath on his skin and she is so near, he wants to kiss her, so he does and to his surprise she kisses back. 

“Did you tell Bruce?” She asks as they break apart gently.

“You’re kidding right? He knows everything.” They didn’t talk, but Tim told Bruce he’s going out with Miss Carrie and Bruce knows what that means. Knows that she could be a permanent fixture in their lives. Knows that Tim will tell her everything eventually. He isn’t thrilled, but Tim is his son and Tim knows Bruce doesn’t want him to be unhappy. 

She smiles. “And he’s okay with this?” 

“He didn’t use that many words,” Tim answers. 

She laughs.  
   
~+  
He drives her home and escorts her to her door. She lives in the nicer part of town in a small two bedroom apartment. Bruce had checked her out before he started dating her, so Tim knows everything about her. All the hard facts and a lot more, because he’s spend so much time with her.  
The goodnight kiss shouldn’t be awkward, because they already kissed once, but it somehow is. Miss Carrie’s lips taste like peaches and Tim pulls her closer until he can feel her ribcage against his own. His fingers tangle in her hair and the purple trench coat and he wants to push his knee between her legs, but doesn’t. They’ve waited so long already, and there is no need to rush this, besides, he wants to tell her about the bird thing at least before he has sex with her. He’s pretty sure he can’t walk away from this, but he also knows the pain, should she reject him, would be a lot worse, after they have had sex. 

“You should go inside,” Tim says, letting go of her and stepping away. 

“Yes…I yes.” Her lips are shiny and pink and Tim really needs to get a grip now. 

“But maybe we could go out again?” 

“A second date, Mister Wayne?” 

“Oh god!” He laughs, “Don’t call me that.”

“It’s your name,” she replies with a grin. It reminds him a bit of Jason’s, but it lacks the deadly edge. 

“You can call me Mister Tim and I’ll call you Miss Carrie,” Tim offers. 

“So, a second date Mister Tim?” 

“A movie and a moonlight picnic?” He asks. 

“That would be lovely,” she replies leaning over again and kissing his cheek. It takes every ounce of training to stop himself from pulling her in again. “I like Casablanca.”

“I know,” Tim says. 

“Bruce told you all my secrets, hasn’t he?” She teases. 

“He didn’t. He gave pointers, however.” 

She cocks her head. “You didn’t ask Jason about-”

“No, because I don’t want to know. I want-” he stops. Breathes. He wants to discover her on his own. He doesn’t want pointers for this, if it should ever come to it. 

Her eyes go soft and she kisses him again, gently, before she says “Goodnight,” and disappears inside her apartment.  
   
~+~  
He drives home in absolute silence and steals into the kitchen where he knows John is waiting up for him. Bruce is on patrol with Jason, which Tim thinks is a good sign. 

“I made you tea,” John says. He looks a bit tired. He had probably been monitoring half the night. How Bruce could have ever done this on his own is beyond Tim. 

“Thanks,” Tim replies, sitting down at the worn kitchen table. He takes a careful sip. “It was good,” he says.

“I didn’t ask. I’m just here so you know you can talk to me.” 

“I want to tell her about me.” 

John nods. “I figured. You told Bruce you’re going out with Miss Carrie.” 

“He’s not thrilled, I can tell,” Tim replies. 

“He’s worried.” 

“He doesn’t have to be. I’m going to start with the bird-thing and if that doesn’t freak her out I’ll tell her I like to dress up at night and beat up criminals in my free-time.” 

“You should maybe use other words,” John says gently. 

Tim smiles, “I’ll just tell her I’m Robin then. And she’ll figure out the rest.”

“She will be in danger knowing who you are, who Bruce is,” John says. 

“I know, but she will also be in danger knowing I’m pretty much the most valuable thing alive on this planet.”

“You and Dick,” John says. 

Tim nods. “Yes, me and Dick. And maybe Superman.”

“Last Kryptonian and all,” John smiles. He eats a cookie and hands one to Tim. “You’ve thought this through.”

“Of course,” Tim answers, between bites. “I never do something just on impulse.” When it comes down to it, Tim thinks, he is the good son. And he’s about to hand Miss Carrie the biggest mystery in Gotham on a silver platter. If that isn’t love, he has no idea what it could be. 

John nods. “It will be alright.” 

“Of course,” Tim repeats eating his cookie.


	5. Testflug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the answer to history's question. See, I take questions as prompts and write you stories :).  
> Beta Icalynn. <3  
> Note: R-point stands for rendezvous point here (and in the future).

**Testflug**  
 _(test-flight)_

“Metas,” Bruce says under his breath. 

“It always sounds like you want to throw them out of Gotham with forks and fire,” Tim says. 

Bruce turns around and doesn’t smile, but there is amusement in his eyes. “You’ve gotten really stealthy.” 

“I’m hanging out with Jason a lot. He learned from the best after all.” Tim shrugs and then changes so he can perch more comfortably on Bruce’s chair. Bruce reaches out and strokes his head, his back, and his wings carefully. He is always more tactile when Tim’s in bird-form. As is Tim for that matter. Tim thinks they never really got over the changing incident. It still makes Tim shudder sometimes and it’s the only nightmare he has. 

“They’re dangerous,” Bruce says, picking up their previous conversation. 

“We’re dangerous. You’re dangerous. And besides I think this Superman over in Metropolis is really trying to help people.” 

“If what he says is true then he’s an alien from a dead planet,” Bruce replies. 

Tim knows Bruce doesn’t trust anyone. Especially when they seem so good and genuine. And Superman hasn’t slipped once since he appeared a few months ago. But the day is still young and all. He could and there would be no one to stop him. But that doesn’t mean no one would try. Bruce would and that worries Tim a bit. 

“Last of his kind,” Tim says softly. He can understand how that feels. True he has his brothers and he has Bruce, who cares and Miss Carrie, but he is still different. Like Dick is different, like Superman is. Suddenly, all Tim wants to know is who Superman really is, or maybe, he thinks Superman, the last Kryptonian, is who he really is (like Batman is who Bruce really is) and the other identity is only a mask. Still Tim wants to meet him. 

“You are not the last of your kind,” Bruce replies gently, stroking his feathers. 

“I’m the only natural shapeshifter of the Bird-people we know of. And I am sure Dick looked around when he was exploring the world. I could well be the last of my kind.” 

“Dick wasn’t able to search the whole world in two years, Tim,” Bruce says. “We don’t know anything for sure.” 

Tim nods and stretches. “I’m going to fly.” 

“I’ll tell Alfred to open the window in your room,” Bruce replies letting go of Tim.  
   
~+~  
Flying is always faster than driving, so he makes it to Metropolis in half the time he would had he taken the car.  
It’s not a well-planned thing to do, but sometimes Tim is impulsive too. Not very often, but this is one of those rare moments.  
He could sit down naked on a rooftop in the middle of the city and just wait for someone to see and – instant media shitstorm here and at home. Bruce would kill him, Jason would laugh his ass off. He lands on a fairly deserted rooftop and changes into human form. What now? 

“Superman?” Tim says into the air. “I’m sitting on a rooftop right now and would like to talk.” It’s the truth, but it pretty much sounds like he’s going to jump any second. Which he could, because changing in midair is a trick he mastered a long time ago. He doesn’t do it often, at least not as Robin – or when someone can see. 

Suddenly there is a gentle gush of wind and then Superman’s cape brushes Tim’s shoulder. He smells different than humans and he radiates heat.  
“You’re naked,” Superman says. 

Tim smiles. “Yes, I am.” 

“On a rooftop,” Superman continues. “And you’re completely calm.” 

“You can hear my heartbeat?” Tim asks. 

“Yes,” Superman answers. “You’re not going to jump.” 

“I didn’t say I would,” Tim replies. “Am I keeping you away from something? This city always looks so clean and calm. Like it wouldn’t need anyone to protect it.” 

Superman sits down next to him and spreads the cape over Tim’s body, so he is nearly covered, except for his legs and feet. But it’s a warm day in Metropolis and Tim doesn’t get cold as easily as humans do.  
“I’m not only helping out here-”

“Tim,” Tim says. 

“Tim, nice to meet you,” Superman answers and holds out his hand. They shake. He feels so warm and smells really good. It reminds him of all the delicious things he likes to eat. “You’re not keeping me away from anything important. This city was alright before I came here,” Superman says. “What did you want to talk about Tim?” 

“How do you deal knowing you’re the last of your kind?” Tim asks, resting his head on his knees and staring at the blue of Superman’s suit. Superman, Tim decides, fits this city of glass and light. Gotham would probably corrupt him.  

“Are you alone Tim?” 

“I have family that loves me,” Tim replies. 

“So do I,” Superman says. 

“Humans who adopted you,” Tim whispers. Like Bruce adopted them. 

“You say ‘humans’ like you’re not one,” Superman remarks. 

Tim stretches under the cape. Superman has a sharp mind. Tim thinks Bruce could like him.  
“Sometimes I feel alien.” 

“From time to time everyone does,” Superman replies and then goes still, listening. Tim can hear a faint crash in the distance. 

“You need to go. People could be in danger,” Tim says gently. 

Superman looks at him. “You’re still naked on a rooftop.” He takes off his cape and drapes it over Tim. It smells like Superman, like fresh bread and sunshine, and lime-worm salad. He wonders what other people smell when they’re close to Superman. Maybe it’s unique to Metas. 

“I don’t intend to kill myself by jumping from this rooftop,” Tim says, cuddling into the cape. He really wants to keep it, but there’s no way he can carry it home in his bird-form. And he can’t walk back home naked either. He doesn’t even have any money to call Dick or Jason or even Alfred. 

“Are you going to kill yourself another way?” Superman asks. 

“I lead a dangerous life,” Tim answers smiling. Really, who knows how old he’s going to be? 

“Tim-” he starts and stops, listening again. 

“Go, I’m alright now.” 

“It’s not about the differences,” Superman says, “It’s about the similarities. Human or not. That is how I deal with being the last of my kind.” 

“Thanks.” 

And then he’s off again, leaving Tim on the rooftop with his cape. Tim knows he could recognize him anywhere now. The scent is in his brain. His heat-signature. The sound of his voice.  
He stays on the rooftop until it starts to get dark and then he folds the cape and changes into bird-form to fly home.  
   
~+~  
Tim has the feeling Bruce kind of hates Metropolis a bit. He looks the most unhappy to Tim when he has to attempt business meetings, especially here. 

“I’ll meet you at the R-point in two hours,” Bruce says and Tim rolls his eyes. 

“Restaurant, Bruce. It’s a fancy overpriced restaurant. And I will be there,” he replies. 

“Don’t wander off and don’t talk to strangers,” Bruce warns in mockery. 

“Yes, Bruce. I’ll be careful. I promise.” 

Bruce smiles and disappears in the big glass and light tower. He wanders the streets, buys a gift for Miss Carrie he thinks she will like, and also picks up a small something for each of his brothers. And then he arrives at the restaurant with fifteen minutes to spare. Bruce isn’t there yet, but the reservations are made and he is shown to their table. As he passes something delicious reaches his nose and he looks around, because he knows that smell: Superman.  
He bumps into the man with the ridiculous glasses on purpose. He staggers a bit, so the man grabs him to steady him, like Tim knew he would. 

“Thank you Mr.-,” Tim says looking up at him.  
For a second the man’s eyes go wide. He remembers, Tim thinks. He saves so many people daily, but he remembers me. Probably because I was naked at the time…

“Kent,” he says and then, “No problem at all.” He’s still holding Tim’s arm carefully and they’re standing in the middle of the restaurant, staring at each other like star-crossed lovers. It’s ridiculous. Tim grins. He wants to say something, but then a heavy, warm, familiar hand settles gently on his shoulder. 

“Tim,” Bruce says. There is a question in his voice and a warning for Mr. Kent to back the hell off. 

“I stumbled,” Tim replies, still grinning. 

Bruce smiles. Tim can’t see it, but he knows it. Tim never stumbles. “I see.”

“Mr. Kent just tried to help,” Tim says. 

“Well, be sure to say thanks. I’ll be at our table,” Bruce replies, letting go of him. 

“Be right there.” 

“Tim-” Mr. Kent says. 

“Wayne,” Tim supplies. “Thanks for helping me out.” 

“It has been a pleasure, Tim,” Mr. Kent says letting go of his arm. 

Tim nods, smiling and turns away. As he walks to the table where Bruce is waiting, he whispers “I hope you got your cape back,” and hears a crash behind him. Bruce is going to yell at him for bringing them to Superman’s attention, but Tim thinks Mr. Kent is a good person and Bruce needs more friends his own age.


	6. Nestbau

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This should have been about furniture shopping and making a home, but instead it's about cushions, rooftop gardens and Dick and Jason having sex...again.  
> This follows Paarungszeit (mating season).

**Nestbau**  
 _(nest-building)_

John looks the apartment over and then just stays in the middle of the living room. “You don’t have a couch, or chairs, or a closet,” he says. 

“I have cushions,” Dick replies. “And besides I just moved in.” 

“Six months ago,” John says. 

“I’ve been busy.” 

“Do you sleep in a box?” John asks looking around again. 

“No, I don’t sleep in a box, John,” Dick answers, patiently. 

“But where do you sleep?” John wants to know. “There is no bed in the whole apartment.”  
The apartment is a small loft on the fifth floor of an old, mostly unused factory building. Dick likes it, it has easy access to the rooftop. 

“I have cushions,” Dick repeats. 

John gives him a look. “I know. They’re lying in a corner.” 

“And a blanket.” 

“You sleep on the floor?” John asks. He sounds a bit scandalized, Dick thinks. Like he never slept in a box, or a nest made of twigs and moss.  

“Cushions,” Dick says again.  
John sits down on the floor and fishes one of the cushions from the corner. The floor is hardwood, worn and scared, but Dick thinks it suits him and the apartment. He also likes the windows that are big and airy. Made up of small squares, some in color. Only a few can be opened, but the morning sun bathes the whole apartment in light. 

“You need furniture,” John replies, pushing the cushion under his head and looking up at the ceiling. “And at least one lamp.” 

“I can see perfectly fine in the dark, John, as can you.” 

“But what about Alfred? What about Miss Carrie?” John asks. 

“Is it serious then? Tim and Miss Carrie?” Dick asks, but he knows the answer. 

“Like a heart attack, Dick.” 

“What is Bruce saying?” Dick asks, perching on the windowsill. It’s wide enough, sometimes he drags a cushion over there and eats his takeout watching the sun go down or rise. He thinks he would like a few really big plants. Maybe John is on to something here. He might need a few things. 

“Not much. He doesn’t want for Tim to be unhappy, but he also knows Miss Carrie isn’t stupid and that the knowledge about Bird-people will put her in danger,” John answers. 

“He cares about her,” Dick says. 

“He cares about everyone, even people he doesn’t know or he wouldn’t be Batman,” John replies.

True enough Dick thinks. “Tim wants to tell her everything, doesn’t he? Not only about him being able to turn into a bird, but also about him being Robin.” 

“Yes, and that is what worries Bruce the most,” John answers. 

“But he can’t not. She would get suspicious if he would come up with excuses every time something bad happens in the city.” 

“We could cover,” John says. 

“Sure, for a while. But I am mostly here now,” Dick replies.  
John sighs. Dick knows he doesn’t understand why Dick had to leave Gotham as his family is there. But Dick didn’t leave his family, point in case John nagging him to buy furniture, he just left Gotham. He had been bumming around for some time when he first left and then the second time he left the country for two years and he knows John had been probably worried sick, but the second time around Dick had been human and trained. And even on his travels around the world he had been honing his skills. He’s different from Bruce, from Jason, even John in that regard. He had to learn his body all over again. 

“You need at least a couch and a coffee table. How do you eat?” John asks. 

“Out or on the windowsill or the rooftop,” Dick replies. He likes eating on the rooftop and looking out over his city. New York fits Nightwing, because it’s like him: colorful and full of life. With a dark undercurrent. 

“Out it is then today,” John says getting up from the floor. 

“We can order in and eat on the rooftop,” Dick replies. 

John looks at him but then just shrugs. “At least I know you have a phone.” 

“To track me better with, Grandmother,” Dick teases. 

“Oh shut up,” John replies.  
   
~+~  
The rooftop is the only part of the apartment Dick did something about. 

“You grow your own food?” John asks. 

Dick shrugs. He learned a thing or two while he was away and it wasn’t all about fighting and dismantling and shit like that. And his neighborhood has a lively container gardening community. Dick likes to connect with people. “Tomatoes and herbs mostly.”

“Blueberries,” John says. 

“Yeah,” Dick replies. They’re Jason’s favorites. Always have been. “And strawberries. It’s not that difficult. The rooftop is big enough.” 

“No wonder you have no time to go furniture shopping,” John says. 

“I am also a vigilante by night,” Dick remarks. 

“Yes, yes,” John says, waving his hand. “But your own freaking roof garden. It’s beautiful.” 

“I like it,” Dick shrugs. “Sit down and eat before it gets cold. It’s the best Indian food you’ll ever put in your mouth.” 

John looks around quickly and grabs another of the big cushions. Dick has roughly thirty of them and ten on the rooftop, on rainy days hidden away in a box.  
John stretches and grabs a carton with food. “Oh god,” he moans. “This is so good.” 

“Just wait until you’ve tasted the rose-lassi,” Dick replies. 

“How are you even able to keep your girlish figure eating like this every night?” John asks between bites. 

“Vigilante work is hard and keeps you in shape,” Dick answers. “You should know. You are feed by Alfred after all.” 

“Speaking off. He gave me containers with food for you. In my bag, downstairs. Mostly cookies and stuff you’ll need to refrigerate.”  

“Okay, tell him thanks.” 

“Or you could do it yourself. Pick up the phone. You’re not Jason,” John says. 

“Uhm…” Dick replies vaguely. He hasn’t seen Jason since the Ivy accident. Maybe they should talk or something, maybe Dick is the only one who thinks they should talk. He wonders if Jason told John and Bruce. He sure as hell didn’t write a report about the whole thing, because he doesn’t answer to Batman. Neither did Jason for that matter. He doesn’t answer to Batman either, but he usually lets him know when and why a warehouse blows up in Gotham. 

“Dick,” John says, putting his wooden fork away, Dick likes that they use wooden forks, they can be recycled. “Dick,” John repeats and Dick looks at him. “About the time we weren’t in Gotham and Jason blew up the warehouse…”

“It was an accident,” Dick replies. 

“You were there then.” 

“As if you don’t know. I know Bruce tracked us down to that warehouse.”  

“You didn’t write a report and when we came back there wasn’t much left of the warehouse. We don’t even know what was in there.” 

“Jason got rid of it all,” Dick says.

“Why won’t you tell me about this?” John asks. 

“Is this why you’re here?” Dick counters a bit too sharply. 

“No, not only. I do miss you. I wanted to see you,” John says, “And no, Bruce didn’t tell me to come and spy on you.” 

“I know you wouldn’t do that,” Dick replies, calmer. He takes another bite of his food and thinks. He knows John won’t pressure him into anything. And this is not only his secret. It’s Jason’s too. 

“Did something happen between you and Jason? He’s been weird too, lately.”

“I guess you can say that. Nothing bad. We were following Ivy, I ran inside without looking first. Jason kinda, by accident, blew the warehouse up. End of story.” 

“The warehouse was gone, Dick. When we came back it was leveled. There was nothing left of it. Not a single stone.” 

Jason, Dick thinks fondly. He wonders if Jason has done it for Dick’s sake. Probably, because Jason doesn’t care what people think of him.  
“Jason made sure no one could salvage the stuff that was stored there. It’s done John. We’re fine.” 

“Are we?” John asks. “Because it’s not like us to have secrets Dick.” 

“I’ll talk to Jason,” Dick answers. “That’s all I can promise, okay?”

“Okay,” John replies scooting closer so they can cuddle. It’s just the evening for it. 

“Wanna go on patrol with me later?” Dick asks. 

“Yes,” John says smiling up at him. Dick kisses the top of his head and then takes another bite of his food.  
   
~+~  
“You called,” Jason says, jumping down from the windowsill. Dick has kept the window open for three nights in a row now, because you never know with Jason. He lands smoothly on the hardwood floor and looks around. Unlike John, Jason is checking for exits and weak points. The apartment has plenty of both. 

“Jason,” Dick says. He’s only wearing a towel, because he had been showering a moment before. And you never know with Jason. 

“What is so important that you’re leaving a million messages on my phone?” Jason asks. He flops onto one of the cushions and waits, looking up at Dick. 

“The warehouse deal,” Dick answers. 

“Did Bruce tell you or John? Wait, it was John. Of course.” Jason sounds fond, Dick thinks.

“You burned that thing to the ground, even you said they would understand, because they’re vigilantes too and because we were under the influence of some kind of sex drug-”

“Yes,” Jason interrupts. He runs a hand over his neck. It’s a tell. Bruce tried to train them out of it, but they aren’t as careful with each other. They don’t need to be is the thing. Dick isn’t going to hold it against Jason. 

“You didn’t tell them.” 

“I figured you would, as it was your first time and all and maybe you didn’t want them to know either. You didn’t tell them.” 

“I’m not in a relationship with John and Bruce, Jason. I am the evil temptress here…”

“You’re not,” Jason says, reaching out and curling his fingers around Dick’s ankle. The simple touch brings back the feeling of Jason’s fingers in other places, his mouth, his lips, the weight of his body against Dick’s. They way Jason looked at him. His breath hitches and Jason looks up from his fingers on Dick’s ankle and into Dick’s face. “You’re not…” he repeats and yanks.  

Dick really should have seen that coming. He lands on his knees hard, spread for balance on both sides of Jason’s legs. He loses the towel in the process and it pools around his knees. His hands land on Jason’s shoulders, his fingers bunching the fabric of his leather jacket. He can feel Jason’s breathe on his collarbone and all he wants to do is lean in, so he can feel Jason’s lips on his skin.  
“Jason…” Dick whispers. Right now they’re still balancing on the edge. He can still just get up and grab the towel, put on clothes and go furniture shopping with Jason. They’re bathed in the early morning light. Dick doesn’t even want to know how they look like this, frozen in time for this one moment. Holy, he supposes. 

“Shut up,” Jason whispers back harshly and leans in to press his lips to Dick’s skin. Dick slings both arms around him and Jason lets himself fall into the cushions on the floor.  
Dick tears at Jason’s jacket and then his t-shirt. He needs Jason naked and now. Needs to feel Jason’s skin against his own.  
Jason helps as best as he can to get his clothes off and Dick moans as he lies down on Jason’s chest, bodies pressed together. Just enjoying the closeness and warmth. And then Jason is kissing him. Possessing his mouth and making Dick breathless. His fingers digging a bit too hard into Dick’s skin. He really should say something or stop Jason, stop this, stop himself, because they don’t have an excuse right now, but he knows it’s not going to happen. The way Jason touches him, the way he runs his fingers and lips over Dick’s scars makes Dick shiver, moan and want to hide. To crawl inside Jason and make a home inside his ribcage.  
He presses closer, kisses harder until Jason flips them over and looks down at Dick. His pupils are blown and he’s smiling. Not smirking, but smiling, a genuinely happy smile. His hair is a mess, but Dick guesses his is too. And he’s hard, Dick can see it. He runs his hands up Jason’s thighs, he loves Jason’s thighs, bracketing his hips, his thumbs drawing small circles in the hollows. Jason moans and throws his head back. 

“Tease,” he says.  
Dick shakes his head slightly even Jason can’t see it. He isn’t trying to be. He just has no idea what he’s doing. This is still very new to him. He goes with his instincts. He digs his thumbs in hard, Jason’s cock jumps and he looks at Dick, his eyes narrowed. “Don’t,” he hisses. 

“But you like it,” Dick replies and does it again, this time with a bit of nail. 

“You don’t,” Jason replies, grabbing Dick’s wrists and holding them away from his body. 

“I don’t know what-” 

“You don’t like pain,” Jason interrupts. 

Dick bites his lip. It’s true, he doesn’t. He understands that the life he’s leading is a dangerous one, but he is always very careful. Here more than in Gotham, which is one reason he had to leave. He’s always more reckless in Gotham, with his family around. “But you like to play rough, you always did.” 

Jason shrugs. “I am adaptable.” He leans down for a kiss and his cock brushes against Dick’s. Dick doesn’t bite back the moan. They can be as loud as they want to be. There is no one to hear them. “I know you like to watch,” Jason whispers against his lips and then leans away again, dragging Dick with him, so they’re both sitting, their legs tangled, and he wraps his hand around both their cocks and begins stroking. Dick is fascinated. He can’t look away and then Jason takes Dick’s hand and wraps it around them too and it’s even better. 

“I love your fingers,” Dick says. 

“On you?” Jason teases. “Inside you?” 

Dick nods. “Both.”

Jason kisses him and then pushes the fingers of his free hand against Dick’s lips. Gently. Running them over the bottom lip, pressing against it until Dick opens up and lets Jason’s fingers slide in. Jason’s hand tightens around their cocks a fraction and his breathing becomes harsher. Dick is torn between wanting to kiss him senseless and keep licking and sucking on his fingers. The decision is made for him when Jason twists his hand a bit and Dick comes, biting down by reflex. Jason swears, shuddering and coming messily between their joined hands. 

Dick lets Jason’s fingers slip out of his mouth and leans his forehead against Jason’s breathing with him in tandem.  
“We’re so screwed,” Jason says, but he’s smiling. 

“Yeah, we are,” Dick replies, wriggling his eyebrows and Jason’s smile becomes a laugh.

~+~  
“What now?” Dick asks after they’ve taken a shower and are devouring what’s left of the Thai Dick ordered earlier on the rooftop.  
The sun shines down hard, so they’re hiding under a parasol. 

“Whatever do you mean?” Jason asks. 

Dick gives him a look. “What about John and Bruce?” 

“I’ll talk to them,” Jason replies. 

Dick doesn’t think Jason is going to break up with them, but he still bites his lip. He really has no idea what got into him, and he knows he should feel guilty, at least a bit, but he doesn’t. It felt good to be with Jason, it felt natural. Dick knows he isn’t meant to be alone. Knows that none of them are.  
“Want me to come with?” Dick asks. 

Jason laughs. “We didn’t do anything wrong. This won’t be a confession.”

“Bruce might see this differently,” Dick replies. And not only the part about the burning down of the warehouse. 

“Bruce sees everything differently. We disagree all the time. I love him, god knows that, but he drives me crazy,” Jason says. 

Dick nods and doesn’t ask about if Jason loves him too. He knows Jason loves him. Just not in what way. He isn’t sure the way even matters. “What about John?” 

Jason sighs. “Don’t make this complicated by thinking, Dick. John loves you. He thinks you hung the moon.” 

“He does not,” Dick replies. 

“He does,” Jason counters. “You could get away with murder.” 

They all could, Dick thinks. Jason did. And John still loves him, Dick still loves him and Tim and Bruce. Nothing will ever change that. John will probably be pissed about the lying/not telling him straight away, not about the sex. Dick knows John was wondering about it. Was worried about Dick’s lack of a love-life. 

“He’s been in love with you from the first day I brought you home,” Dick says softly, throwing a pebble against the opposite wall. 

“He doesn’t look up to me. Not like he looks up to you. You’re his moral compass.” 

“Well, I obviously failed then,” Dick says. 

“Only by other people’s standards. Not our own, and that is all what matters. He won’t forgive us, because there is nothing to forgive, Dick.” 

“Okay,” Dick replies and lets Jason hug him. He feels sun warm and smells like Dick’s shower gel. He feels like home, so Dick snuggles closer.  
   
~+~  
“You need at least a bed,” Jason says stretching. 

Dick hands him a mug of coffee. “It’s like you never slept in a wooden wine-box,” he teases, shaking his head. 

“Don’t get me wrong, I like your cushions/pillows/blankets nest thing you have going on here, but you could try to keep up appearances.” 

“Appearances? What for? I am a vigilante by night and sleep or work in my garden during day.” 

“The hot delivery-guy? Or the girl from one street over that smiles at you every time you guys pass each other by?” 

Dick looks at him. “What? Have you been spying on me?” 

“I wouldn’t call it spying.” 

“What would you call it Jason?” Dick asks, but he isn’t angry. He knows that since he got kidnapped they are all worried. And extra cautious. 

“Looking out for you. There are people checking you out, Dick. Give them a chance?” 

“Maybe,” Dick replies. He hadn’t even noticed anyone checking him out. 

“My work here is done,” Jason says. 

“So, you fuck me and think I am cured?” Dick laughs. 

“Oh, but I didn’t fuck you at all,” Jason purrs. It’s obviously meant as a joke on Jason’s part, but it makes Dick shiver. He grabs his own mug tighter. “Oh,” Jason says softly. “Would you-”

“I don’t know!” Dick interrupts a bit too sharply. “I don’t know.” He takes a deep breath. “Maybe.” Because he liked it the first time with Jason’s fingers inside him. He’s dreamed about Jason’s hands. 

“Because I would,” Jason says. 

But why, Dick wonders. Why would Jason do it? It’s a nagging question at the back of Dick’s mind. Is it because he knows Dick isn’t comfortable with anyone else, yet? Or because he thinks Dick should have a person he could get off with? Because Jason likes sex? And Dick knows that Jason likes sex, no one who is so good and passionate about it, cannot like it. 

“I’ll think about it,” Dick replies. 

“That’s the worst thing you could do,” Jason says. “If you thought about it today we wouldn’t have had great sex, Dick.” 

Dick nods. “True enough.” 

Jason puts the mug on the floor, because Dick still doesn’t have tables and the kitchen is too far away, and grabs his jacket. “I’ll swing by. Leave the window open.” 

“Bruce would have a heart attack knowing I left the window open,” Dick replies smiling, following Jason to the windowsill. 

“Ah, but it’s the only way birds can come inside, don’t ya know?” Jason replies, grabbing Dick by his neck lightning fast, kissing him hard, and jumping out of the window. In freaking broad daylight.  
Dick looks down, sees Jason wave as he starts his bike. He waves back, shaking his head and leaves the window open.


	7. Freier Fall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angry, messed up, angsty John/Bruce/Jason sex. Because I felt like it. /o\  
> Fallows Nestbau.

**Freier Fall**  
 _(free fall)_  
   
“Just fuck me,“ Jason grits out, digging his fingers into the hard muscle of Bruce’s back and then bites down on Bruce’s shoulder as Bruce pushes in. Bruce makes a noise and Jason can’t help himself and bites harder, tasting blood. 

“Jason,” Bruce says, pushing him away. Jason holds on, but Bruce is stronger, so he lands on his back, staring up at Bruce and the wound he had just inflicted. 

“I know you like it rough, but this is too much,” Bruce says, he tries to sound calm, but he isn’t. 

Jason closes his eyes. He needs to be fucked hard and he needs to give back as good as he gets. He needs to push all of Bruce’s buttons.  
“Just shut up and fuck me,” Jason hisses, slinging his legs around Bruce’s middle, his ass brushing against the underside of Bruce’s dick. 

Bruce sits up and pulls away. John touches his wrist and Jason turns his head to look at him. John always looks gorgeous naked. Jason wants to kiss him and pet him and sleep beside him. He needs to…he needs to tell John. To tell Bruce.  
“Jason,” John says gently, leaning down and kissing his wrist. 

“I had sex with Dick,” Jason whispers. John takes a sharp breath, Jason can feel it on his skin, and then kisses his wrist again. 

Bruce is very, very still on the bed. Jason makes himself look at him.  
“How many times?” He asks. 

“Two.” Two, glorious fucking times and Jason wants to do it again and again and again. He’s been with people on and off, usually only once with a person. Hook-ups, one night stands. Bruce and John know. It’s just how he is. He likes sex, he likes sex with different people and genders. There was never anything more to it, but it’s different with Dick. And Jason had known it would be different with Dick and he had done it anyway. 

“Why?” Bruce asks, getting up. He is all controlled tension, standing at the foot of the bed, and looking at Jason. Jason can feel his hot piercing gaze. 

“Because it’s Dick,” Jason answers. He could tell them about the sex-pollen thing, but that had only been a catalyst. 

“You’ve always been in love with him,” John says softly. 

Jason nods. Of course John would know. “Yes,” he replies anyway. 

“Everyone is,” John says, lying down next to Jason, curling into his body. He isn’t mad, not like Bruce. John understands him, because he’s John and he is one of them and because he is in love with Dick too. But for John it’s Bruce, Bruce and Jason. Only the two of them. Jason knows John won’t sleep with anyone else. That is how their people work, but Jason has always been different, messed up. Not quite one of the bird-people, not quite human. Broken in that way. And Dick is too. At least now. He had been different before he got kidnapped. Dick had been one of the bird-people. Truly and only and happily. And now he’s human and still dealing with that fact on a daily basis. 

“I thought you choose one person. One you want to be with for the rest of your life and this here, this arrangement is because John fell in love with one of his people and one human being. You and me, Jason.” 

“I’m different,” Jason says. “I’m broken.” 

“You’re not,” John whispers into his skin. “You’re not broken. Like Dick isn’t broken.” 

“So, you never loved me then?” Jason asks as Bruce’s words sink in. He sits up and John grabs his arm hard. But Jason isn’t going anywhere, he just needs to be sitting right now. “This, you fucking me, was only for John’s sake?” 

“No,” Bruce answers. Jason doesn’t believe him. 

“It would be okay. I love sex, I love when you fuck me as hard as you dare and I still want you to do it harder. I love watching your control slip for a few seconds, love seeing you with John. Love every single moment of the hot, dirty, passionate sex with you. And it would be okay, if it were only sex for you Bruce, but don't you dare lie to me!” He feels his anger rising. He should have known. He should have known, because this is Bruce and he is the most fucked up person when it comes to sacrificing shit for other people’s sake.  

“I didn’t. I don’t.” 

“You sure about that? We seduced you and maybe you thought it would be okay, it would be safe with me there too? I know you wanted John. From the very beginning you felt a connection to _him_. Me? I just made you look at me, pay attention to me, fuck me, because I know how to push your buttons.”

“I didn’t fuck you for John’s sake!” Bruce says sharply. “Don’t you think I know how to say no?” 

“You do know how to say no. But I let you do all the things you want to do, I crave them. I want them and you need an outlet. You would never use John like that.” 

“Jason!” Bruce says. 

“All the dark desires, Bruce,” Jason purrs, his voice soft and inviting. His body lax and taunting. He licks his lips and tastes blood. Bruce’s blood, Batman’s blood. That Bruce lets him draw willingly. “And my body is your playground, because there is not much lasting damage you could do.” 

“Jason,” John whispers and Jason’s head snaps in his direction. John kisses him, gently, carefully, slowly. It takes Jason completely by surprise: he has been so focused on riling up Bruce he nearly forgot that John’s here too, watching him. “Why are you trying to hurt yourself?” 

“It’s what I do, John,” Jason admits. 

John sighs and kisses him again. “Just don’t. I get it. I get why you slept with him. I’m glad it’s you. He can trust you.” 

“John?” Bruce asks. There are all kinds of questions underneath that one word. 

And Jason gets it now too. Bruce is worried about Dick. He knows how Jason likes to play rough, how he not only delights in being manhandled, but also in causing pain as well. But it’s not how it works with Dick. And Bruce doesn’t get it, because Bruce’s never seen that side of Jason. Jason has never shown it.  
“It’s all rainbows and sunshine, and vanilla sex with Dick,” Jason spits out.

“And you like it?” Bruce asks. 

“With Dick,” Jason answers. Only with Dick. He guesses he would like it with John too, but he also likes that John lets him play rough. Even if he is never as rough as he’s with Bruce. Bruce…maybe he wants to be gentle too, but Jason can’t take that, not from Bruce. Not anymore. Because it’s fighting and disagreeing with them all the time and why should it be different in bed? Besides Jason _likes_ it, loves the dynamics they have. 

“Jason would never hurt Dick,” John says with utter conviction. 

“And what about letting Dick hurt you?” Bruce asks. And he is still gloriously naked and passionate and worried. 

“I don’t let him do that either. It’s not who he is. It’s not what this is about,” Jason answers.  
John leans into him and kisses his shoulder. Jason closes his eyes. These small unconditional gestures of affection from John. He’s been given them since he came to live with Dick and John. Because John has known that Jason has been starving for it, but didn’t know how to ask. Still doesn’t know how to ask for it. And for John it’s easy to give, because that’s the person he is. 

“What is it about, Jason?” 

“None of your fucking business!” Jason explodes, yanking free of John and getting up. He has had enough of this. He had come here because he wanted to get fucked and if Bruce isn’t going to do it then he’s going to find someone who will. 

“Jason!” 

“What?” He screams turning to face Bruce. “I’m not answering to you anymore!” 

“Why are you doing this?” 

“That’s pretty vague. Why am I doing what? Getting up and leaving? Because you won’t fuck me and that’s why I came here. Why am I yelling at you right now? Same fucking reason.” 

“It seems lately you only come here so I would fuck you,” Bruce says. The ‘hard’ at the end of the sentence is implied. 

Jason looks at him as if he were mad, he knows he does. “Because that is the reason why I am coming over here, Bruce.”  
He needs to get all the anger and blood-rage out of his system and the best way, the most harmless way is to let Bruce fuck him, to let John kiss him and cuddle up to him. He can’t go to Dick like this, because Dick would let him do anything and it would destroy Dick in the process and it would destroy the rest of what Jason thinks is his good fucking core.  
He comes here when he feels desperate and out of control and like killing something slowly and painfully. He always feels better when he leaves here. Sure he can get a hard fuck anywhere, but it’s not the same. Bruce knows him – or at least his body, can follow the clues and give him what he needs. 

“And if I tell you not to come here?” 

“No, Bruce,” John says. His voice hard. John rarely disagrees with Bruce on things. 

Jason wants to tell Bruce he can go and fuck himself and that his little security measures won’t be able to keep Jason out. Tim would let him in anyway. So would Alfred and John for that matter. But Bruce isn’t talking about that. He’s talking about denying Jason himself. His body, his strength ,his control. 

“Then I will leave more dead gangsters on your doorstep,” Jason shrugs. He has no illusions about himself. He knows his triggers, he knows how to keep his darker desires and temper in check. Like Bruce does with his own. Bruce has to know this about him, Jason thinks.  
Bruce grits his teeth. 

“Jason…” John says from behind him and Jason turns to look. John is splayed out on the bed and he’s smiling, touching himself, gently, running his hands over his torso and insides of his legs. “Don’t go.” 

And the thing is Jason won’t, can’t, because John asked him to stay and he wants him to touch John. And just like that Jason is starting to get hard again. “Okay,” Jason says, throwing his clothes on the floor again and crawling into bed with John. Kissing him, letting John sling his arms and legs around him and thrusting against his dick. “Okay,” he breathes and John laughs against his neck, not letting go. 

“I’m already prepared,” John whispers, biting his shoulder. 

And all Jason can do is grit his teeth and push inside. John’s slick, true, but he’s also tight. “Not enough,” Jason grits out. 

“Sometimes I like the burn too,” John replies, his arms and legs tightening, everything tightening around Jason’s body. It’s hard to breathe, but it’s a good kind. “Just move.” 

And Jason does.  
   
~+~  
Bruce grabs and kisses him hard as he starts to pick up his clothes again. He had only been watching so far. John is an exhausted mess on the bed. Jason feels trapped. He wants to cuddle with John like he usually would and he wants to be out of here. What he wants, he realizes is to fly. Spread his wings and just fly. Feel the wind, let it carry him. He kisses Bruce back instead. With teeth and more force than is necessary. 

“Want to fuck me now?” He whispers. 

“Why didn’t you tell me about the warehouse?” Bruce asks, his hands tightening around Jason’s body. He could break the hold, but he would hurt Bruce in the process and he thinks he’s drawn enough blood for one night from Batman. 

“Because there was nothing to tell. I handled it. Dick and I handled it,” he hisses. 

“You’re hiding something,” Bruce says. 

“Always,” Jason replies and kisses him again. Truth is he’s tired, but he would let Bruce fuck him. He can feel how hard Bruce is. Jason presses closer. “I came already, as did John…I know he would suck your dick, but maybe you want a piece of my ass instead?” He asks sweetly. He doesn’t know why he’s always pushing with Bruce. Maybe because Bruce can take it.  
Bruce stares at his mouth and Jason grins, licking his lips. “Or maybe you want me on my knees? Because lately I’ve been a very, very bad b-”  
Bruce kisses him hard to shut him up, but he’s letting go of Jason, so Jason is free to do whatever. Sink to his knees for example. And Jason wants to. He knows, like Dick, John likes to watch. “You don’t have to hold back,” Jason says against Bruce’s hip and then he swallows Bruce down without further comment.  
Bruce’s hands are heavy on Jason’s shoulders, but he isn’t thrusting, so Jason grabs him by his thighs hard and yanks, opening wider. Bruce’s fingers tighten a fraction. 

“Just give in, Bruce,” John says.  
Jason can feel his gaze on them. It makes everything hotter. Better, more. And Bruce does, because John is fucking magic. For a second it’s hard to breathe because it’s so good, but Jason adjusts fast and then it’s even better.  
Bruce comes, biting back a moan or a curse, or Jason’s name. It doesn’t matter.  
“Will you come back to bed now?” John asks. 

Jason wants to, but he isn’t sure he should. 

“Yes,” Bruce says, tracing Jason’s lip and then pulling him up by the neck. “Yes, we are, John.” 

“Good,” John says. “Tim will be thrilled to see you at breakfast Jason.” 

Jason gives him a look, but doesn’t argue. Sometimes he thinks, it’s just too easy to give into John’s soft demands. He suspects he isn’t the only one with that thought. He curls up beside John and lets him pet his hair and kiss his shoulder until he falls asleep.  


	8. Haut und Federn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is about Tim being happy, because sometimes life is good.

**Haut und Federn**    
 _(Skin and Feathers)_

Tim isn’t nervous, because this is not their first date. It’s a bit more romantic than the last and he hopes that they can avoid talking about how impossible their mutual attraction is in the eyes of society. He just wants to enjoy Miss Carrie’s company.

“So, going out with Miss Carrie again?” Bruce asks from the door to Tim’s bedroom. Tim had left it opened because he had known that Bruce would come to talk to him sooner or later.

“Yes,” he answers, glancing at Bruce through the mirror. He isn’t nervous about this conversation either. They had variations of it already – in their own weird way.

“Can I come in?” Bruce asks.

“Yes, of course,” Tim answers. He’s already dressed too. Only his hair…is a mess, like a bird’s nest. He smiles to himself.

“I know you want to tell Miss Carrie everything. We talked about it already-”

“That is not what you want to talk about?” Tim interrupts. He has no idea what problems there could be besides the big secrets in their lives.

Bruce shakes his head slightly. He always seems more human, more him, with them around. “It’s about Miss Carrie and me.”

“You’re freaked out about the fact that she slept with you – and Jason?” Tim asks.

Bruce rubs his hand over his face. “Not freaked out, Tim. Concerned.”

“Because I’m young or because I didn’t have sex with anyone yet?” Tim asks, cocking his head, looking at him.

“Both.”

“Younger kids than me have had sex. John was younger when you took him to your bed. I don’t see the difference. You were experienced.”

“Jason and John had had sex before I took them to my bed, Tim.”

Tim bites his lip. “But I can’t be with anyone else. I can’t. It’s her or no one.”

“Tim…”

“I know this is difficult for you to understand, but that is how it’s supposed to be for us. John and Jason they are different. Dick too. Now. The…the kidnapping changed him. He still doesn’t fly in bird-form. But that is not how it’s supposed to be. What I am doing, Bruce, that is how it’s supposed to be. One person. For the rest of my life.”

“And if something should happen to her?”

“If she dies before me? Women live longer, but if she dies before me I will be alone.” He shrugs. “To be honest Bruce, I think I am the one in danger to die first. What with the life I lead.”

“I never wanted this life for any of you,” Bruce admits.

They know that. All of them know that. “We make our own decisions. You couldn’t have prevented it.”

“I know, Tim. Still.” 

“It will be fine. She is a good woman. She is smart and caring and she’s tough. Has an iron-core. Gossip doesn’t faze her. She can be with me. And I will do anything, anything, Bruce, to be with her.”

Bruce nods. There is an awkward moment when he stands and Tim just steps into his personal space and hugs him. “I want you to be happy, Tim.”

“I know. I am.” Because it’s true, he is happy. Here with Alfred and his insane family, and Bruce, even the dangerous night-life.  
   
~+~  
“What’s on your mind?” Miss Carrie asks, she’s squeezing his fingers in hers. They’re warm and a bit damp.

“The secrets I’m keeping from you and pretty much everyone,” Tim replies.

“Not your family,” Miss Carries says.

Tim smiles, kissing her knuckles. “No, not my family.”

“You want to tell me, don’t you?” She asks, her eyes wide.

“Yes.”

“What does Bruce say about that?”

“He’s not thrilled, but he loves me, and he cares about you, too.”

“It will freak me out, right?”

“You weren’t freaked out when I was walking around naked all the time. Or when you saw me eating worms.”

“I know that in some parts of the world insects are a delicacy. That is a bit strange, but it’s not something to freak out over. Besides all of you do that. The worm thing.”

“And you still want to kiss me,” Tim teases.

“Always, Mister Tim,” she replies and kisses him until they’re both breathless and pressing closer. He can feel her heart beating against his chest. Can feel the softness of her breasts through the thin summer-dress she’s wearing. She lets herself fall backwards onto the blanket and pulls him on top of her. “Tim…” and it’s more of a moan than anything else. He wants her so much, but kisses her cheek instead, her neck, and then sits up, running a hand through his hair.  
She’s panting, looking up at him. “Tim?”

“I can’t.”

“It’s okay, I know you weren’t with anyone before-”

“It’s not that. I think I can figure that out,” he smiles at her.

“It’s the secret. You don’t want to sleep with me before I know and have made a decision.”

“Yes,” Tim answers. It’s a good thing he chose to have the picnic on the grounds of the manor. It’s safe here.

“Okay, tell me.”

“Is it only because you want in my pants, Miss Carrie?” Tim asks with a smile, but there is concern under that too.

“I am not a teenage girl, Mr. Tim,” she answers, touching his hand.

He takes a deep breath. “The reason I walked around naked all the time is, that it didn’t feel natural to me to wear clothes,” he starts. She nods. “I am not exactly ordinary,” he continues. This is so frustrating. How do you say: I can sometimes turn into a bird?

“Tim, it’s okay.”

“I can turn into a bird,” he says, looking into her eyes.

“What?”

“I turn into a bird. At will. It’s the natural thing for me to do,” he pulls away from her and just turns. His clothes falling to the grass.

She stares. “Tim…”

“I know it’s…strange,” Tim chirps.

“You can speak in this form and you…what about your brothers?” She asks.

“They were birds too.”

“But not anymore?”

“Because John fell in love with a human he turned and stays human. He can’t turn back. Only a few of my people can. I can,” Tim explains.

She reaches out and then snags her hand back again. “I…”

“It’s okay, you can touch. Hold out your hand,” Tim says and she does. He hops onto her palm.

“You are a robin. A beautiful…so cute,” she strokes his head carefully with a finger. “And so soft.”

“Uhmm…thanks.”

“It was you in the manor from time to time, right?”

“And Dick,” Tim answers.

“And you can turn at will into a bird…and that is why you don’t like clothes, because they aren’t natural.” She takes a breath. “And that’s why you like worms and…you’re a bird, Tim.”

“You’re freaking out right now, right?”

“A bit, just a bit,” she answers with a laugh. “You are so freaking special.”

“That’s one way to call it.”

“Tell me about…everything? Yes? About your people and your parents and why Bruce adopted you. No, not that one. I know why he did it. You are special and people may want to harm you, sell you, take you apart to see how you tick, why you can do what you can do. Bruce adopted you so he can protect you, right?” She asks.

“Yes.”

“And…” she stops, looking at him, sadly. “The time Dick was gone and you were all so freaked out and messed up. Was he taken?”

Tim doesn’t look away from her face. He nods. “Yes, he was.”

“I’m so sorry,” she says.

“It wasn’t your fault and we got him back,” Tim replies, hoping down from her hand and flying circles around her. He shows off bit, some of the things he has learned from Dick. They never fail to impress.

“You are amazing.”

“Thank you,” Tim replies, changing in flight and landing smoothly at her feet.

“And you’re naked again,” she teases.

“I like being naked,” he says.

“I don’t think it’s fair…I should be allowed to be naked too,” she replies and begins to strip.  
   
~+~~  
“I hear Bruce had a version of the ‘Talk’ with you,” Jason grins. He’s leaning against the door of the balcony with a cigarette between his fingers.

“About the birds and the humans, yes,” Tim replies.

“How did that go?”

“As you might expect,” Tim smiles.

“I don’t think he needs to worry.”

“He’s Batman, it’s what he does. And he cares for us and Miss Carrie,” Tim says, stripping out of his clothes.

“Speaking of-”

“No comment,” Tim interrupts, but he knows Jason can see the bruises and marks she left on his body all too well.

“You are no fun.”

“Not everyone cares so much about sharing every little detail of their sex-life, Jason.”

“And still, here you are, stripping,” Jason teases, taking a drag from his cigarette.

Tim can’t stop the smile. “Because I need someone to know.”

Jason puts out the cigarette against the railing and crosses over to hug him. He smells like smoke and the city and Jason. Tim hugs back, his fingers tangling in Jason’s leather jacket. “She’s amazing,” Jason says.

“Yes, she is,” Tim whispers and let’s Jason kiss the top of his head. “Are you staying?”

Jason shrugs. “Might as well. It’s a quite night in Gotham.”

“Good. You can tell me how Dick is doing in New York.”

“You should go and visit, little wing.”

Tim nods. “I will.”


	9. Die Versuchung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is for **Icalynn** because she wanted to know what they boys would do, should there be a way to be able to change back into bird-form.

**Die Versuchung**  
 _(temptation)_

“It’s not tested,” Tim says. 

“But it could work?” 

“I’m not a specialist on these things, John,” Tim answers. 

John nods. “And Bruce knew about this?” It’s not a real question. Of course Bruce knew about this. He confiscated everything back when they had gotten Dick back. John had thought he burned it all, or had deleted it, or whatever. Had gotten rid of it all, but it doesn’t seem that way. 

“He let Mr. Fox work on it.” 

“But why?” John asks. 

“Isn’t that obvious?” Tim says. “Because he wants you to fly again.” 

John’s breath hitches. He doesn’t think about flying in his bird-body much anymore. It’s a thing of the past. He doesn’t regret his decision. “I would be like you.”

“Not quite. As I understand it. It’s like a serum, you take it, and you can change. It wears off after a few hours. It would probably burn through our system even faster.” 

“But I could change. I could fly,” John says. “Jason could fly.” And if Jason could fly, he could maybe make Dick fly again. Make Dick use his other form. 

“Yes,” Tim replies. 

“Thank you for letting me know about this.” 

“I bet Bruce had reasons not to tell us…” Tim says. 

“Bruce always has reasons, that doesn’t mean they are good reasons, Tim.” 

“Try not to be too confrontational about it?” Tim says with a smile. 

“I’ll let Jason handle it,” John grins back.  
   
~+~  
“What the hell?” Batman growls as he’s pressed into the wall by Red Hood. “I’m working!” 

“We need to talk,” John says from the shadows. This is a secure area, and Tim is scrambling any and all signals too, just to be on the safe side. 

“We could do that at home. When I finish my patrol.” 

“It’s a quite night,” John replies. 

“And lovely too,” Jason throws in, pressing closer to Bruce. With those two it’s always balancing on the edge between hot dirty sex and violence. 

“Jason!” Bruce grates out, shoving him aside. Jason backs down. “What is so important that it can’t wait?” 

“The serum,” John answers. 

“The one Fox is developing for…not Wayne Enterprises. It’s more of a pet project, isn’t it?” 

“Why didn’t you tell us?” John asks. 

“It’s not done,” Bruce answers. 

“You can’t even test it, Bruce. You will never know if it works if you don’t let us take it.” John says. 

“We have no idea if it will work, or if it’s dangerous.” 

“You’ve been working on it for five years, Bruce, for fuck’s sake!” Jason explodes, running a hand through his hair. “You should have told us there was a chance to turn.” 

“I didn’t want to get your hopes up,” Bruce says. 

John wants to call bullshit on that. “Or your own?” 

“Were you afraid we would leave? And what about Dick? He needs…something. That doesn’t hurt him as much as his current state,” Jason throws in.  

“I’m aware of that, but I am also aware of the risks.” 

“I want to take it,” Jason says firmly. 

“No way in hell,” Bruce replies. His voice is steel. It would make anyone else back the hell down, but not Jason, not him either. John wants to be able to fly again. He doesn’t think he’d ache for it like this, but now that there is a chance for it, he wants to grab it and never let it go. 

“Bruce-”

“It’s an untested serum, John. With no way to know how it will work, if it will work, and once it’s in your system it could damage you beyond repair. Experts on Bird-people aren’t exactly running around.” 

“It’s our decision if we want to play guinea pigs!” Jason says. 

“And if it doesn’t work? If you get sick? If you can’t change back? Jason? Did you think about these possibilities? No, you didn’t, because you never do.” Bruce says calmly. “It might take years to find a safe way to test it, but I will let you know.” He looks at John then. “Did you tell Dick?” 

They couldn’t keep that a secret, not from Dick. “Yeah…” 

Bruce nods.“I understand why you did it. I can’t imagine how it was for you to lose this ability, to lose a part of yourself, and Dick never wanted to be human in the first place, but you can’t take it. Not now at least,” he finishes. 

Jason punches the wall. It’s a good thing he wears the gauntlets. “I miss it so damn much,” he says quietly looking up at the sky. 

John nods. “I do too.”  
   
~+~  
“He’s angry with me,” Tim says quietly. 

“He’s angry with himself that he underestimated your skills,” John replies, letting Tim crawl into his bed. Bruce is still out on patrol and he made it very clear he would finish it alone. Bruce doesn’t like to be ambushed like that, but that is of course the reason why they did it, so he couldn’t come up with a plan. 

“He’s right,” Tim whispers. “I was just hoping…I don’t know. I wanted you to know there is hope.” 

John puts an arm around Tim’s thin body. He’s naked again, he always is in the manor when he can get away with it. And Bruce won’t be home for a few more hours. 

“And I am grateful for that,” John whispers back. He means it too. 

“I think I was selfish too. I want you guys to fly with me again. This is nice, don’t get me wrong, but it’s different when we are…well, us. Even the world looks differently, smells differently, feels differently.”

“I know,” John says. He can still remember, but it’s fading, being replaced by other things, other memories and senses. Sometimes he feels jealous watching Tim change in midair. Jumping from a building just to soar above the city. But mostly he’s happy for Tim. 

“And I am worried about Dick, John. Really worried. He used to be so happy while flying and now every time he does it it’s combined with pure agony. I want to fix that, but I don’t know how.” He sounds frustrated, John thinks. Like it’s his fault things are like they are. Part of it might be guilt because in Tim’s little life things are going so well, but John doesn’t think Dick is unhappy. Not all the time and now with him and Jason hooking up, there is one thing less to worry about. 

“He’s not unhappy,” John says gently. 

“He could be better,” Tim sighs against John’s collarbone and snuggles a bit closer. 

“You don’t have to feel guilty for being happy, Tim.” 

“I’m not. I just want everyone I care about to be as happy as I am,” he replies softly. 

John turns them so he can look at Tim’s face, one leg over Tim’s, holding him close. He kisses Tim’s forehead and Tim sighs. “You…” he says, because there are no words for how much he loves Tim. 

Tim closes his eyes. “Sleep now,” he whispers and “I know. I love you too.”


	10. Elster

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dick/Jason again. Jason steals the serum, sex happens.

**Elster**  
 _(magpie)_

“Are you crazy?” Dick asks, running a hand through his hair. 

Jason gives him a look. They have already established his mad tendencies, so it’s not a real question at all. He holds the serum up and thinks. It’s stupid, he knows it. But Bruce will never test it. How could he anyway? It’s a pet-project that will never be used. And it would be a shame to let all that hard work and money go to waste. Someone has to try it out. 

Jason is just the man for the job. He doesn’t have much time either, because by tomorrow Bruce will know someone has stolen the serum and there aren’t that many suspects, really, to choose from.  
“It’s me or no one,” Jason says shrugging, but he isn’t unaffected by this. It could go very, very wrong after all. 

“There are reasons why it hasn’t been tested, Jason!” 

“Yes, I know. Mainly because there are no guinea pigs that can fly – or turn human or into a bird for that matter. It’s the best he can do. You know it,” Jason looks at him then. “I _miss_ flying.”

“Jason-” Dick says, he sounds a bit broken again. 

Jason hates hearing Dick’s voice like that. It reminds him of all that is wrong with the world. “I’m going to take it no matter what. I just thought it’s safer to use drugs with friends.” He grins. 

Dick sighs. “I still don’t have a bed.”

“You have cushions. Lots and lots of cushions, and Bruce’s number on speed-dial. Just in case,” Jason replies. 

“I don’t like this.” 

“Pretty much five years in developing, Dick. It has to do something.” 

“Fry your insides?” Dick asks. 

Jason laughs. “That is the last thing, I think, it’ll do. The worst would be if it doesn’t work.”

“Okay, fine. Lay down and… Do you need to be naked for this?” Dick asks. 

“You perverted little thing,” Jason answers. 

“I didn’t mean-” he takes a deep breath, “I needed to be naked for it. Or, they made me. I don’t know if it was needed or just another way to break me.” 

“Dick-” Jason says and his free hand balls into a fist. He’s so angry still at what had happened to Dick. There aren’t even words in the human language to express that anger. 

“Just…I didn’t mean anything by it, okay?” Dick says.

“Okay. I can be naked, I guess. I like being naked with you,” he winks and Dick rolls his eyes. “Let’s get this party started then,” he adds and starts to strip. It’s a bit harder with only one hand, but Jason’s never had a problem getting naked. 

He lies down in the nest of pillows and swallows the serum. Dick is watching him. 

~+~  
The sensation is odd. Not really painful, but nothing like the first time either. He can’t remember feeling a thing the first time: one minute he had been a bird, the next he wasn’t anymore. This time it is different, he can feel his bones shrink and shift, but it doesn’t hurt. 

“Tastes like cherries,” Jason says and it sounds different, it’s more like chirping and then everything looks different. The world seems bigger and Dick is staring at him in awe. Fuck.  
But Jason loves it when Dick looks at him like that. “Put out your palm,” he says and Dick does. 

Jason hops into his hand and Dick stands up carefully. “Jason…”

“How do I look?” Jason asks, he feels fine, but he has no idea if he looks like he used to, or if he’s turned green or whatever. 

“Beautiful. You look absolutely perfect,” Dick says, stroking a finger gently over his head and one wing. That sensation is odd too, but very pleasant. He leans into it and Dick laughs. It sounds delightful. “Beautiful,” he repeats. 

“I sure as hell hope so,” Jason says. He shakes his head, and plucks at his feathers. He stretches when Dick lets him and then looks around the apartment again. The ceilings are high and there isn’t any high furniture or lamps. He could just fly here. A test run. He has no idea how long the stuff willtake to burn through his system. And he doesn’t want to fall to his death.  
He spreads is wings. “Okay, I’m ready, just…” and Dick throws him gently up into the air and Jason flies. It comes naturally, like breathing. It’s freaking wonderful and he has no idea how he didn’t go stir crazy without it in the last five years. He flies from one end of the loft to the other and then back, and then he shows off a bit – Dick had taught them pretty sweet moves. 

“Show off!” Dick accuses, but he’s still laughing, still happy. 

Jason lands on the windowsill and looks at him. “Open the window,” he says. 

“You think that is a good idea?” Dick asks. 

“I’m going to stay close. I promise. The roof, maybe the one next to yours too. It’ll be fine. They think it’ll last one to two hours. I’ve only changed ten minutes ago. Let’s say I have 30 minutes left. Just to be on the safe side. Open the window, Dick. Please I want to feel the wind.” 

Dick bites his lip. He is clearly thinking. They’re wasting precious time here. Jason starts hopping from one foot to the other.  
When Dick looks up again, his eyes are burning. “Turn away,” he whispers as he starts to strip. 

“What? I've seen you nak- Oh,” he says as realization dawns on him. He turns away. He’s seen Dick transform when he had been forced to do it. It hadn’t been pretty. And Dick doesn’t want him to see, but he wants to fly with him. Jason takes everything he can get in this case, without pushing for more. The sounds Dick makes are awful. Jason is sure he can hear bones breaking. This is not how it’s supposed to be. Bruce needs to fix this. He takes a deep breath to calm himself down and startles when Dick joins him on the windowsill. He’s breathing heavily. 

Jason gives him a look. He wants to ask if Dick is okay, but doesn’t. “Great, now we’re trapped in here, because you didn’t open the window first.” 

Dick smiles, it’s all in his eyes in this form. “You have no faith in me, hmm?” Dick asks looking up. Jason follows his gaze. There is a small window open, near the ceiling where only a bird could fit through. “I always leave one open, Jason. Don’t you know? That’s how birds can come in.” 

Jason laughs, taking off. Dick follows. 

~+~  
Flying with Dick is so much more fun. It’s his way back to his childhood. The good parts, the parts where Dick took care of him and John and later Tim. The parts where he had felt loved. Unconditionally so. They race and show off and are reckless. Flying higher and higher and letting the wind carry them, they dive way too fast and land in a heap on the rooftop just before the serum starts to wear off. 

Jason can feel it in his bones first, so he stays on the rooftop while Dick circles around him, spirals higher and higher. Jason loves to watch Dick fly. It’s the most beautiful thing in the world. At least to him, at least right now.  
It’s a good thing, he thinks, that he can feel the serum wearing off, it gives him time to find a safe place to change back. He snuggles into the cushions on the rooftop and waits it out.  
The adrenalin is still rushing in his veins. He feels high on endorphins. 

“Jason?” Dick asks from above. 

“It's wearing off,” Jason chirps, but his voice breaks in the middle of the sentence. 

Dick lands smoothly beside him. Jason closes his eyes and only listens to Dick changing too. When they’re both human and naked again, he turns to look at Dick. He’s still smiling.  
“Beautiful,” he says again and Jason loses it. 

He grabs Dick and pins him to the ground, covering Dick’s sweaty body with his own. This part of the rooftop is just secluded enough he thinks as he starts kissing Dick. Biting at his lips, jaw, and neck.  
Dick arches under him, kisses back just as desperately and Jason has no idea if it’s because he’s high on adrenalin too or if it helps with the pain of the transformation. He doesn’t ask, but stores the question away for later.  
He’s nearly vibrating with the need to bite and claw at skin and flesh, he doesn’t, he mouths Dick’s shoulder instead, groans into Dick’s skin as that makes Dick dig his fingers into the muscles of Jason’s back. It makes Jason push down and closer. Makes him rut against Dick’s hip like a fucking teenager. He pulls his mouth away from Dick’s skin and sits up a bit, loosens the grip he has in Dick’s hair.  
Dick opens his eyes and blinks at him. It looks like in slow motion, but it’s probably because Jason is so fucked. 

“Why did you stop?” Dick asks, his mouth is so red. So fucking red and shiny and it makes Jason think of other shiny, wet holes. Of Dick writhing and clenching around his fingers, of Dick’s harsh breathing, his skin glistening with sweat. 

“No idea,” Jason grins and attacks Dick’s mouth again. 

Dick lets him, at least for a while. Lets him explore and suck and – fuck, Jason thinks, he wants to be inside Dick so badly now. He turns them over so Dick’s sitting in his lap, running his hands over Dick’s thighs and legs. Dick leans back a bit so Jason’s cock can slide between his cheeks. He’s so fucking bendy, Jason thinks, his breathing coming sharper and heavier now. 

“You stopped because you want to fuck me…” Dick whispers. 

Jason’s hands tighten on Dick’s legs. The desire to press Dick down into the cushions on his stomach, press Dick’s face into them, one hand on Dick’s neck, the other on his hip, keeping him down, keeping him in place, keeping him _still_ as Jason fucks into him – that thought, that particular fantasy has crossed his mind. More than once.  
“Always,” Jason says, grinning. 

“We don’t have – anything, here,” Dick replies. 

“You want to then?” Jason asks. 

Dick is still moving his hips, Jason’s cock is still sliding against Dick’s ass, but it’s not slick enough.  
Dick nods, but says, “Don’t stop,” at the same moment. Jason wouldn’t stop touching him now if he were paid for it. Seriously. There is no way he’s getting up, going down and getting lube. He lets go of Dick’s leg and sucks at his fingers, coats them in saliva before he slides them inside Dick carefully. 

“I saw this nice slim toy last time I was cleaning up the shadier part of the city,” Jason says.  
Dick’s eyes snap to his face, but he can’t stop moving against Jason’s fingers. “And it made me think of you. Spread out and wet, trembling-“

“Jason,” Dick hisses, his nails digging into Jason’s flesh. 

“You would like that, I know you would,” Jason replies, speeding his movements up. He can’t make himself let go of Dick’s thigh so he adds “Touch yourself, Dick.” It’s harsh and more like a command, but Dick doesn’t give him shit for it.  
All of them, and Jason is no exception, love to watch people get off, especially when they get off watching him. Are turned on by him. Dick so clearly loves to be fucked. Loves to feel Jason’s fingers inside him. And it shows.  
Dick’s fucking erotic poetry in motion as he comes. Jason gives him time to come down, even if he can’t stop thrusting. 

Dick bites his lip as he looks up at Jason again. “I want-”

“Anything,” Jason interrupts, because he’s done it pretty much all at this point. 

Dick nods, slithering down Jason’s body and Jason has to close his eyes, because he can’t fucking watch Dick giving head. His cock in Dick’s mouth is nearly enough to make him come, but then Dick licks carefully before he sucks hard and Jason can’t even warn him to pull away. He’s a boneless mess lying on Dick’s ridiculous cushions.  
Dick is just a mess, wiping at his mouth. “Not the best thing I’ve ever tasted,” he says, falling into the cushions beside Jason. 

“Guess it’s an acquired taste,” Jason replies. “John likes it.” 

“Hmmm…” Dick hums, cuddling closer. 

The air smells like night blooming flowers and tomatoes around them. He kisses Dick’s shoulder and falls asleep. 

~+~  
He’s covered in a light blanket when he wakes up. Dick’s sitting on the railing, his legs dangling like a child’s. He’s only wearing a t-shirt and boxers. Jason slings the blanket around him like a toga and joins Dick on the railing. 

“Cigarettes are by the yellow tomatoes,” Dick says without looking away from whatever he’s staring at in the distance. 

“Thanks,” Jason replies, but plucks a small yellow tomato from the plant instead. They taste surprisingly sweet and a bit gritty. “So, why so pensive big bird?”

“It was good flying with you,” Dick answers. 

“But?” 

“It really hurts a lot to turn. I don’t know if-”

“Does the sex help?” Jason interrupts. 

Dick gives him a look. “What?” 

“I mean, after the transformation. You seemed so desperate for someone’s touch-”

“Your touch, your fingers, your mouth – the dirty words,” Dick cuts in. 

Jason nods, trying not to be bothered by the images. “But does it help with the pain?” 

“Yes, but I’d rather not,” Dick answers. 

Oh, Jason thinks. Okay, only fair enough. Dick has a firm line between pleasure and pain and muddling them is nothing he wants to explore. “You should go to Bruce and take the serum then, because Dick you were born to fly.” 

“I know,” Dick says softly and then he turns and looks at him. His eyes are a bit hooded. He bites his lip again. Nervous fucking habit. “Did you buy it?” he asks in nearly a whisper. 

The thing is, Jason did, so he nods. He hadn’t had much hope Dick would actually let him use it on him, but…well, when you see something that makes you think of someone special you better get it. “Yeah…” he says. “You’re curious about it? How it would feel inside you?” 

“I like your fingers and your tongue and I think-” he stops and looks straight into Jason’s eyes. “Yes, I am curious about how it would feel and it made you think of me, so…” He shrugs. 

Jason grabs him by his neck and kisses him hard. “You should come over soon. You’ve never even seen my apartment. It has a bed, Dick,” he grins against Dick’s lips, feels the smile there. 

“I hear they’re very common.” 

“I know you hate everything mainstream…but it’s not all bad,” Jason says. 

“I guess I can try sex in a bed at least once,” Dick teases, but it’s also a promise, so Jason kisses him again.


	11. Die Verführung

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More Dick/Jason having sex, because they're apparently the kinkiest kinksters to ever kink in this verse.../o\

**Die Verführung**  
 _(seduction)_

Jason’s home is a bit like Jason, rough and unfinished, but with a certain charm. Dick likes it. He’s sure Bruce would hate it. He wonders if Bruce has been here already, at least once. Probably not. There is brick everywhere and the floor is cement where there isn’t a rug thrown over it.  
He hasn’t lied: there is a bed. It’s big and looks messy, half hidden behind a folding screen. There are pillows and cushions on the floor beside it, like he had been tossing and turning too much in bed. 

“Nice…” Dick says looking up at the three dozen or so birdcages hanging from the ceiling. Most of them seem old and are rusty in places. A few look newer; the paint flaking.  
The whole place is full of art. Dark art – mind you, but expressive and big. Even the folding screen is painted. 

“It’s a hobby,” Jason replies shrugging. “I pay the local kids to do it.” He adds. 

Dick had known of course that Jason liked pretty pictures, even in his bird-form he dragged pieces of comics and stick-figure drawings home. He just had no idea how great that love for art really is.  
And he’s doing a good thing too, by buying paintings for his home from the local teenagers. Jason has always cared in his own way. And his way is more personal than Bruce donating a large sum of money to the local orphanages. 

“They have talent,” Dick says, running a finger over a dark red line. The paint feels gritty under his fingertips. All of these paintings look angry to Dick, but he guesses when you live in this part of town you are angry. 

“It wouldn’t do any good to encourage the kids without talent, Dick,” Jason smiles, handing him a mug of tea. It’s the expensive stuff that Alfred buys. 

It sounds harsh, but Dick gets what Jason is trying to do here.  
“I like this one,” Dick says, still running a hand over the raised lines. They feel a bit like his own scars. 

“You can have it,” Jason replies, stepping closer, so he’s standing directly behind Dick. 

“Did you buy that one with me in mind?” Dick asks softly. 

Jason runs his fingers down Dick’s side, where the scars are hidden under his t-shirt. “Can’t say it didn’t cross my mind, Dick.”

“It’s less angry than the others too.” 

“I like to think that this one is about the healing process,” Jason replies. His breath is ghosting over Dick’s neck. He suppresses a shiver. He hasn’t come here just because he wanted to have sex with Jason again. He had come here to see how Jason is doing. How he lives, how he has made the home for himself look like. It’s not really surprising that it’s as different from the manor as it could possibly be. Brick, steel, and cement. Some wood and the art, big splashes of dark color, interrupted by a few cheerier pieces. Dick likes it, he really does. 

“I’ll let the driver pick it up,” Dick jokes. 

Jason leans down and smiles against his skin. “Alfred would.” 

“I can handle it myself, Jason. It’s not that heavy.” 

“It’s big,” Jason says. 

“Is that an innuendo?” Dick asks. 

“You have such a dirty, dirty mind, Dick,” Jason answers, pulling at his shirt a bit so he turns to face Jason. 

“I didn’t come here because you bought a toy,” Dick says quietly. 

“Hmm…” Jason replies against his neck, kissing it, and then mouthing at the skin of his shoulder through the thin t-shirt. He pulls Dick in closer still, so their bodies touch as much as it’s possible. “Want to see my bed? Or the shower?” Jason asks. 

Dick’s fingers curl in Jason’s shirt. “Are you seducing me?” 

“Do I have to? I would, slowly and extensively,” he answers. “You like it slow, don’t you?” 

Dick hesitates and then nods. “Yes.” He does. It still scares him sometimes how much he wants. How much he wants Jason to kiss him, to touch him. How much he wants to feel Jason’s fingers inside him. How much he likes hearing Jason talk while he touches him. How much better Jason’s words make it all feel. 

“And I like watching you lose it. Love to see you come undone under my hands,” Jason says, because of course, of course he knows that Dick loves it when he talks about what he wants to do, or what he’s doing, or will do in a second. Part of it is, surely, that it takes away the fear, part is how Jason sounds when he’s talking dirty. He’s so clearly turned on by it all. By Dick, by his body. Imperfect as it is now.  
Dick looks up and kisses him. Hard and demanding, because that is what he wants to do now. Jason slows the kiss down until he’s exploring Dick’s mouth and lets Dick explore his in return. Dick’s hand starts to clench and unclench around the fabric bunched in it. He’s sweating and pressed against the brick wall, he realizes. Jason is smiling at him. “Bed or shower?” he asks again. 

Dick can’t decide. Jason’s hands under his shirt are distracting. “I-” he gasps as Jason licks him. “Bed,” he gets out. He thinks he needs to be somewhere he can’t slip and fall on his ass or split his head. Shower seems like a dangerous location right now. All slippery and wet – fuck, he shouldn’t even go there. 

Jason grabs his hand and drags him to the big bed. Dick doesn’t even try to get his clothes off on the short way. He is still holding the mug. It’s only a few steps from where they started to make out in front of the painting, Dick’s painting now, to the messy nest of pillows and blankets. The bed is made of wood, raw. The headboard is entirely made of branches, thick and solid, but smaller and thinner at the top. It looks a lot like a tree, Dick thinks. Jason is sleeping in a nest. Dick smiles to himself. The night table looks like he got it from the manor, which he probably did, as does the big leather chair in the corner.  
Jason doesn’t erase where he comes from and where he’s been at all, he makes it work for himself, in his own unique way. 

“You look fond,” Jason teases, pushing him onto the bed. 

Dick puts the mug on the table and lets himself fall, smiling up at Jason. “I love what you did with the place.” 

~+~  
To his surprise or not, Jason isn’t tearing at his clothes, even Dick can feel the restless energy thrumming through Jason’s veins. Can feel it in his own veins. 

Jason strips him slowly and kisses, licks and strokes every new bit of uncovered skin. It’s a slow burn, Jason’s touch. Dick is arching into every kiss. Moans at the soft, butterfly strokes. The attention Jason pays to his scars. Long faded, but still ugly. The skin there is always more sensitive, it makes Dick bite his lip and turn his head into the pillows (that smell like Jason) when Jason nibbles at them gently.  
Dick is panting harshly when Jason finally makes his way past his bellybutton. His lips paint a path in kisses and saliva over Dick’s hip and the sensitive insides of his thighs. Dick’s legs fall open on their own accord when Jason’s thumb graces his ass.  
Dick’s sweating and grabbing the sheets in fistfuls, tugging at the soft, expensive material. 

“You have no idea how good you look,” Jason whispers into his skin. “Good enough to eat,” and he bites down – not too hard – into the tense muscle of Dick’s thigh, just before he spreads Dick wider and begins to lick. It’s different in this position, the licks only shallow and not penetrating at all, but it drives Dick crazy with want and desire. He starts to turn without really thinking about it. Jason’s hand on his hips stops Dick. “I want to see your face,” he says against the wet skin of Dick’s ass. 

“You can’t see my face anyway right now,” Dick replies, “And I need-”

“More?” Jason asks. 

“Yes,” Dick answers. “More.” 

Jason hums and fishes under the pillows for something – lube, Dick’s mind supplies. Jason keeps lube under his freaking pillows. The bed is really more of a nest. Before Dick can mock Jason about it, Jason is pressing one finger inside him, gently, slowly, carefully. He’s only teasing: shallow, slow thrust with the tip of his finger. Dick tears at the sheets, not really caring if they rip. This feels so good. After what feels like an eternity, Jason adds another finger, stretching Dick.  
Dick’s meeting him on every thrust now. His hips rolling as much as Jason’s hand on them allows. “Ready for more?” Jason asks. “Because I think you are. You crave just a little deeper, don’t you?” 

Dick’s breath stutters. He sits up a bit to look at Jason. “Jason…”

“You’re not afraid are you?” Jason asks, kissing his hip, his stomach, the fingers inside Dick still stretching, teasing. “Want to see it first? Touch it?” Jason carries on. “Hold it in your hand? Or maybe lick it?” 

_It_ , Dick thinks, a foreign object that Jason wants to put inside him… He really tries not to tense up at the thought of it, but memories of the time he had been held captive and probed with all kinds of things that didn’t belong into his body come suddenly rushing back. 

“Dick? Are you okay?” Jason asks, looking up at him. 

Dick nods and then shakes his head. When Jason had talked about it the last time, it had gotten Dick all hot and bothered, but now. Now he just isn’t sure anymore. “I don’t know…”

Jason’s fingers slip out of him as he sits up. Dick moans and bites his lip at the loss. He can feel all of Jason’s attention on him and he sits up straighter too. He closes his legs and takes a deep breath. “We don’t have to use it, but I thought you wanted to. Were curious about it. I mean, the thought seemed to get you off.” 

“It did,” Dick says. “But…”

“It’s a foreign object, that I want to shove up your cute little ass,” Jason says. 

Dick laughs, startled. “Yes, yes…I just…I get flashbacks when I think about it too hard.”  
Jason nods. He leans over, gets the toy out of the nightstand drawer and holds it out to Dick.  
It’s slim and crystal blue. It doesn’t look scary at all. 

“Come on, touch it,” Jason says, running a finger over it from tip to root. The lube on his hand makes it shinny and slippery. Dick reaches out and touches it. It’s not that hard either. The surface gives under the pressure of his fingers. “It’s pretty flexible, waterproof and vibrates. And it warms up fast too.”

“Did you use it?” Dick asks. 

“No. I got it for you,” Jason answers, shrugging. “Would it help if you could use it on me first?” 

“No,” Dick answers, because he doesn’t think it would help. He makes a fist and let’s it warm up, and slide against his skin. It’s not entirely smooth. His breath hitches a bit at the thought of how it might feel inside him. Jason sees it of course. 

“I got it in blue because it made me think of your uniform. Do you even know how good your ass looks in it?” Jason says. 

Dick’s eyes snap to Jason’s. “I usually can’t see my ass, Jason…” 

“Maybe I should get a few big mirrors,” Jason muses, inching closer to Dick. He kisses Dick before he can formulate an answer. Jason’s hand closes around Dick’s with the toy. “You really should know how good you look when someone is playing with your ass.” He adds, pulling gently at the toy. Dick lets it slip out of his hand and lets Jason push him down into the pillows again. Jason’s mouth is hot and agile on his skin and Jason’s hands are spreading Dick’s legs gently, but with intent. He lets it slide against Dick’s leg, his thigh, between his cheeks, switches it on, Dick bites his lip at the soft vibrations, it’s strange, but it’s also good. 

“Look at you,” Jason whispers. “Already straining to get more of it inside you,” he nudges Dick’s entrance gently with it, but doesn’t push it in. It’s skin warm and slick and feels so good. Dick is trying to push against the hold Jason has on him. 

“Jason…” he says. 

“What?” Jason asks. “Tell me what you want.” His fingers graze Dick’s ass. 

Dick shakes his head, but he knows Jason won’t push it in if he doesn’t say it. It’s not a power-thing for Jason. It’s about consent. He takes a shallow breath, “Push it in,” he whispers. 

And Jason does. Slowly and carefully. “You know what the best thing about it is?” Jason asks. Dick gives him a look. “I have both hands free to drive you even crazier,” he says and starts to do just that. His hands are everywhere on Dick’s body except in the proximity of his cock. 

The toy in his ass makes him moan, the vibrations make him shiver, and when he shifts the toy shifts too. His skin feels like it’s on fire. Jason is playing with his hair, kissing him senseless, whispering filthy things into his ear that he only half catches. “Do you think you could only come from this?” he asks, licking Dick’s neck and kissing a trail lower, sucking on a nipple on the way down. Dick arches into it and the toy slips, he clenches around it on instinct. 

“Jason, Jason…” he says again. It’s more a plea, really. 

“Should we try this?” Jason asks. Dick can only shake his head. “Not today? Or not ever?” 

“Not today,” Dick grates out. 

Jason slips between his legs and starts licking around his cock. “Looking forward to it,” he says, smiling against Dick’s skin and then swallows his cock. It doesn’t take much after that for Dick to come, biting his lip so he doesn’t scream. 

When he comes down again, Jason is straddling him, cock in hand. “Jason…”

“Let me come on you?” 

Dick nods, but Jason doesn’t start stroking furiously as Dick thought he would, he covers Dick’s body with his own, making a place between Dick’s legs for himself and starts thrusting against the slippery mess there. Dick grabs him by his hair and kisses him roughly, nearly suffocating them both, because he can’t make himself let go until he feels Jason’s come against his skin. 

~+~  
Dick runs his finger over the messy surface of the toy lying between them. 

“Not such a bad idea after all, hmm?” 

“Is it weird that I want it to have a name?” Dick asks in a whisper. “Just… _it_ sounds so cold.” 

“A bit I guess, but there is no room for shame in my bedroom, Dick. You can totally name your sex-toy. Did you choose a name already?” 

“As it’s a boy, obviously, I was thinking Bluebird,” Dick replies. 

Jason laughs. “Fitting I guess, if not very creative.” 

“Hmm…”

“You want to take it home with you?” Jason asks. 

Dick hadn’t thought about it. The temptation is there. “Not sure…”

“Bluebird could use a sibling, he wouldn’t be so alone then. You would have to keep him at your place…And maybe you could record your progress in self-pleasure for my pleasure?” 

That is actually intriguing, Dick thinks. “Let me think about it.” 

“Sure, Dick,” Jason replies and kisses his forehead.


	12. Das Beobachten von Vögeln

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jason and John watch Dick masturbate. Because I like exploring Dick's issues and sexuality.

**Das Beobachten von Vögeln**  
 _(bird watching)_  


John had wanted to start with something like ‘Bruce is really freaking angry’, but the words don’t make it out of his mouth. He’s perched on the windowsill looking inside, watching Jason, watching Dick. He has a short moment of panic until Jason turns around and grins at him. He gets up, opens the window and lets John inside.

“Sorry to interrupt,” John says, hopping down onto the cement floor.

“Wanna talk about how mad Bruce is or want to watch a movie with me instead?” Jason asks.

John isn’t sure he should watch the video that is paused right now. “I…”

“Don’t worry, I just started and I am more than up to watching the beginning again.”

“This is Dick,” John states.

“Yeah…”

“And he’s stripping…” John says.

“Yeah,” Jason replies.

“Is this Dick-porn?” John asks. He knows it is.

Jason grins. “Aren’t they all?”

John slaps his arm a bit too hard. “You…he recorded this for you?”

Jason rubs his arm, his eyes going soft. “Yeah, he did.”

John’s never watched porn before. Hasn’t even been tempted to do it, but now with Jason close and it’s Dick. “I can’t. He did it for you.”

“I’m sure he wouldn’t mind,” Jason says.

“We can’t know that,” John argues. Jason nods and gets out his phone. “What are you doing?”

“Asking Dick if it’s okay to watch it with you,” Jason answers.

“Don’t do that!”

“Too late,” Jason replies hitting send.  
   
~+~  
It turns out that Dick doesn’t mind, but he’s the only other person that is permitted to watch the video. John still has mixed feelings about it. Dick raised him and he always loved Dick, will always love Dick.

“So?” Jason asks.

John nods his head. No one needs to know about it. Well, except the people involved, he guesses.  
Jason pats the spot on his bed beside him and pushes play.  
   
~+~  
Dick doesn’t speak, the light is low and John can’t really make out that many details of Dick’s body. He can’t see most of the scars he knows are there. That’s probably what Dick was going for, he still has issues about this body. And he still doesn’t have a bed. He’s lying in a nest of cushions and blankets, sprawled out on them. Long legs parted slightly as he teases himself. John can’t look away from Dick’s hand, his wet lips, the shadows his lashes cast.  
The soft rhythmic buzzing makes him gasp, he wants to ask Jason about it, but he doesn’t dare look away from the screen for one second.  
Jason inhales sharply beside him. John reaches out blindly and grabs Jason’s hand, holding on tightly. He’s heard about toys, seen them too, but he’s never held one. There’s never been a need, between having Bruce and Jason in his bed. Now, watching Dick playing carefully and gently with it, teasing himself, without pushing it inside, now John wonders. The toy looks very slim and it’s glistening with lube, disappearing between Dick’s thighs. Dick makes a soft noise, bites his lip, and grabs the cushion hard. He is freaking erotic poetry in motion and then he pushes it in, his legs falling open, his hands clenching the cushions on both sides, his head thrown back. John wonders why he doesn’t touch himself. With both hands free he could. He should. John leans closer to the screen and then catches himself, he licks his lips. Fuck.

“Fuck,” Jason says beside him and then watches as Dick continues to not touch himself. His hips make these small, desperate looking movements, but he doesn’t let go of the cushions. John licks his lip again. He wants to taste Dick, he wants to make him come. He wants… He’s so going to fuck Jason as soon as he’s seen Dick come.  
It takes another seven minutes of breath hitching, small movements, and restless clenching and unclenching of fingers before Dick lets go and comes untouched all over his stomach.

John is squeezing Jason’s fingers way too hard. “Lube,” he says.  
Jason hands it over and he’s on Jason in an instant.  
   
~+~  
Later, when they are lying on the bed, John’s arm is touching Jason’s, and their breathing is still heavy, he turns his head to look at Jason and says, “He does that for you. He puts himself on display like that for you.”

“Yeah,” Jason replies and he sounds fucking awed by it. “But he likes it too. I wouldn’t ever do anything he isn’t into, John.”

“I know,” John says, kissing Jason’s shoulder. He rolls on top of Jason, ignoring the mess between them. “You’re totally slowly ruing him.”

“You think so?”

“Toys, Jason. _Toys_.”

“Did you see how slim it is? How small?” Jason asks, running his fingers over John’s back. John nods. “That, my fingers, and my tongue-” John groans at the image, “Were the only things inside him.”

“Don’t you want to-?” he asks.

“Of course I want to, John. Seriously. Have you looked at him?” John nods. Dick is very attractive. “But he’s messed up about his body and about what has happened to him.”

Oh, John thinks. “That’s why you bought the toy in the first place,” because John just knows that Dick would never buy a toy for himself. “To take away all the bad memories and replace them with something good.”

“It does get me hot and bothered when I see him fuck himself with it, or when he lets me fuck him with it.” Jason grins.

John kisses him, because Jason deserves so much more than he’s getting for being who he is. His methods may not be common, but he cares and they work.  
“I love you,” John says and kisses him again. “I love you.”

“I know.”

“You’re reckless and dangerous and I love you,” John repeats, because maybe Jason needs to hear it more often from them.

“I now,” Jason repeats. “I know.”

And that is good too. John nods, resting his head on Jason’s chest and listening to his heartbeat.  


	13. Gleichgesinnte

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one follows 'Testflug'. Tim sets up a play-date for Bruce.

**Gleichgesinnte**  
 _(birds of a feather)_

To say Bruce is not amused would be the understatement of the freaking century. Tim had known, of course, that it would make Bruce angry, but he did it anyway. John can’t say he disagrees with Tim’s reasoning once he explained it all.

Clark Kent is currently fidgeting on the sofa in the library. Alfred would have preferred the sunroom, but Bruce had been in a dark, broody mood, is still in a dark, broody mood and John knows he has no desire to put on the Bruce Wayne mask for some reporter’s benefit.  
But Bruce also knows Tim is right. Bruce needs to give one interview at least and Clark Kent is writing for the Planet and has a good reputation.  
Besides Bruce hates dealing with Vicky Vale.  
Tim doesn’t tell Bruce that Clark Kent is Superman, but he did let Clark know that he knows he’s Superman. Which probably leads to Clark thinking that Bruce knows his secret identity too.  
John’s head hurts thinking about it.

“You’re evil,” he whispers to Tim.

“We have to make our own fun around here,” Tim replies with a small smile.

“What’s with the whispering? Are you telling dirty jokes again?” Jason asks.

John turns to look at him. “Didn’t know you would come today too.”

“Tim said it would be fun and Bruce said it’s for a family friendly piece in the Planet and I should dress accordingly.” He shrugs. Well, he is dressed, John thinks and kisses him just because.

“Tim invited Superman into our home,” John says against Jason’s lips.

“Really? Dick will be so pissed he isn’t here.”

“He said he would try to make it,” Tim throws in. They really need to stop observing poor Mr. Kent in the library. It’s just the slightest bit creepy.

“You think he can hear us down here?” Jason asks.

Tim shrugs. “No idea.”

“Is that why we’re whispering?” Dick asks from behind.

John beams at him and throws himself into his arms. “You made it!”

“Of course, Tim said it would be fun, Bruce told me to wear something nice. What is going on?”

John fills him in. Dick grins.  
   
~+~  
“You have a nice home, Mr. Wayne,” Kent says.

“Thank you,” Bruce answers. “It turned out quite nice after the renovation.”

“I hear it was more of a rebuilt?” Kent asks.

“Yes, an unfortunate event,” Bruce says.

“You burned parts of it down.”

“By accident,” Bruce replies.

Tim is following the conversation with his usual attention to detail and frowns. “Bruce doesn’t like him.”

“They didn’t even start for real yet,” Jason says.

“Bruce thinks, Kent is prying.”

“He is, that is his fucking job,” Jason replies. “Why did you think it was a good idea to invite freaking Superman into Bruce’s home anyway?”

“Our home, yours too,” Tim corrects without looking away from the screen.

Jason waves his hand. “Whatever. Still. Why?”

“Tim thinks Bruce needs more friends his age,” John answers.

“And Superman will be a good match because?”

“They’re both really into justice,” Dick says as earnestly as he can.

“Oh fuck you guys!” Tim explodes, but he’s smiling too. “He seemed like a nice guy. He didn’t even comment much on my nakedness and wasn’t weirded out.”

“You met Superman for the first time naked?” Dick asks.

“First impressions are important, Dick. I didn’t want to give him a false one.”

This shouldn’t make sense to them at all, but it does. John knows he isn’t the only one who feels that way.  
“Okay, so how long do you think it will take for Bruce to figure out Kent is hiding something?” Jason asks.

“Are we betting?” Tim wants to know.

“Sure,” Jason replies.

“If we are, no sexual favours are accepted. Only money, chocolate, and worm-salad.”

“You are no fun,” Jason teases.

“If I win, I get nothing out of it, Jason,” Tim sighs.

Dick sniggers, grabbing one of the chocolate bars and handing it to Tim. Tim nods a thanks.  
“Why do you even think he needs friends his own age?” Dick asks. “He has us.”

“We aren’t really his age or objective when it comes to his decisions, neither is he, for that matter. He needs someone to keep him in check and I think Superman needs someone like that too. Maybe even more than Bruce.”

“Ah…” John says, finally understanding Tim’s motives. He’s worried. He always is. Like Bruce.

“Speak for yourself. I can call him on his bullshit,” Jason throws in.

“Yeah, but you do it because you’re pissed off…” Dick says.

Jason shrugs. “It’s how we work.”  
John really wishes it would be different. But as long as it doesn’t escalate and they still can get together for hot, dirty sex…well, John really takes what he can get. Everything he can get.

“I’ll say he already knows that Kent is hiding something,” Dick says.

“Probably. How long until he finds out he’s Superman?” John asks.

“Kent is playing that role very well…the clumsy reporter, but Bruce knows all about masks,” Jason says. “Five chocolate bars say he’ll know as soon as Kent leaves the library.”

“That's no fun, you guys. Let’s see how long it takes Bruce to figure out why Tim set him up with Kent,” John says.

They turn to look at him.  
Tim smiles. “Deal.”

~+~  
“Tim,” Mr. Kent says in the hall and Tim turns to smile at him. John is pretty sure that is why he left at exactly the time he left.

Sometimes, John thinks, Tim is really fucking scary. But he is always so proud.  
“Yes, Mr. Kent?” Tim asks in his sweet, 'I am so innocent' voice.

Mr. Kent isn't buying it, John can see it. “Why am I here?”

“To interview Bruce,” Tim says.

“But,” he runs his hand through his hair. “Did you tell your-” he hesitates here, “dad?”

John sees Tim smile again. “Is there something I should have told him?”

John bites his cheek and keeps walking to the library where Dick and Jason are already waiting. It's their favourite room and that's the one Mr. Kent will be allowed to take their picture in.

~+~  
“So, how was it?” John asks.

“He made implications,” Bruce replies. He sounds grumpy, John thinks.

“About?” Jason prompts.

“About how I sleep with my sons,” Bruce replies.

Jason laughs out loud. “But you are fucking us!”

“But that was in no way the reason I adopted any of you and I am not fucking all of you. Just John and you, and that isn't fucking either. We talked about this Jason.”

Jason shrugs. “Call it what you want. It's the same to me.”

Bruce stiffens, just slightly. John knows Jason didn't mean it in a bad a way, but sometimes Jason doesn't take the time to think about the phrasing before he speaks.  
“Where's Tim?”

“Talking to Mr. Kent,” John says.

“He set me up,” Bruce replies.

“Yeah, he did,” Dick says with a smile.

Bruce smiles back. “You came.” Bruce is always so happy when he can see Dick. They are still careful around each other, but John knows they care a lot about each other and them. The whole family.

“You said it was a family thing. I didn't think we’d have to pose for a picture for the Planet.”

“I'm surprised too,” John says. “Tim doesn't like having his picture taken.”

“Except when it's for the greater good,” Tim says from the door.

“And what would that be?” Bruce asks.

Tim smiles. “You like a good mystery, don't you?”

Bruce nods. “Yes.”

“And Mr. Kent ticked you off, right?” Tim continues.

“You know he did. He's hiding something.”

“You will love this and then you will yell at all of us,” Jason throws in.

Bruce sighs. “I could just pull up the feed from the cave, you know?”

“There is no feed,” Tim replies.

“Tim!”

“Just have some fun with people your own age for a change,” Tim says and changes so he can perch on Dick's shoulder. His clothes are on the floor and John picks them up.

“You think I don't have enough excitement in my life?” Bruce asks, but there is a smile in his eyes.

“You do, but fun? Not so much. Lately,” Tim chirps. “This will be fun Bruce. Give it a chance.”

“Fine,” Bruce replies. “It's a good thing I am not into torture,” he adds.

Jason makes a noise, but wisely chooses not to comment.

“Dinner is ready, sirs,” Alfred says from the door.

“Saved by the bell,” Dick whispers.

John smiles.


	14. Körperbau

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dick and Jason talk. Apparently that happens too, from time to time.

**Körperbau**  
 _(body composition)_

Dick bites his lip, shaking his head. 

“You didn’t watch it before you sent it to me?” Jason asks. 

Dick shakes his head again. He couldn’t, after he had checked the light and had stripped he couldn’t look at himself at all and it hadn’t only been because he had been masturbating, mostly it’s because he doesn’t like to look at his body naked. 

Jason eats another dim-sum and looks at him. “You look hot. John was all over me after he’d seen the video.” 

“Oh…okay.” Dick takes a sip of his water and plays with his worm-salad. Alfred’s recipe, but it still tastes a bit different. 

“Why did you let him watch?” Jason asks, putting the chopsticks down on the floor. 

Dick shrugs. “I don’t know. I thought you would like it. I know you like to share things with John.” 

“I like to share Bruce with John, Dick, and ice-cream and books, but that doesn’t include the porn you record for me.” 

“But you asked,” Dick says looking him directly in the eyes. You don’t ask something like that if you don’t want to share. You just say no, I can’t let you watch it because…any reason at all, Dick thinks. 

Jason takes a breath. “I want people to see you, how I see you, and how you so obviously don’t see yourself. I wanted to share that with someone and I knew John would understand my motives,” Jason replies. 

Dick nods. “I guess it didn’t hurt that he got all hot and bothered either, hmm?” 

“No, it didn’t hurt at all,” Jason answers, leaning forward so their noses nearly touch. “He thinks you’re beautiful, Dick.” 

Dick sighs. He had thought that too, that he had been, maybe not beautiful, but decent looking, for a bird that is. It hadn’t seemed to mean so much how you looked as a bird. He misses that sometimes. The uncomplicated feeling of being at home in his own body, in his own skin. He lets himself fall into the cushions and stares at the ceiling. It’s still early, the whole apartment is awash with light, with a few spots of color on the walls from the colored glass. He watches the light dance and thinks that this is beautiful and not the scars and burns and twisted things on and inside him.  
Jason’s finger trails gently over his arm and he fights the urge to flinch. It’s too bright to bee naked like this. The light too harsh. He turns his head into the cushions, so he doesn’t have to see Jason’s face. 

“You have only one mirror in the whole apartment Dick. A small mirror in your bathroom above the sink.”

“I need to see my face, Jason, that is all I need to see, to comb my hair and brush my teeth and shave,” he replies. It’s a bit muffled because he’s still pressing his face into the cushion. Jason’s finger is dancing over the sensitive inside of his elbow. There are scars there too, faded to a silvery white. But he remembers how he got every single one of these, even if he can’t remember all of them. Sometimes he had been too drugged to feel more than pain, and he has never tried to even figure out where it exactly came from. 

“Dick…” Jason says, his breath ghosting over the pale scars. 

Dick turns then, yanking his arm away. “Do you like them?” He asks, but it’s a hiss: anger curling in his stomach and his voice like smoke, choking him. “Do you think they make me more beautiful?” 

“Dick.” 

“Because I don’t! I hate them, and if I had to look at my body, this human body, every day I would probably kill myself. They’re a constant reminder what has been done to me, a constant reminder of who I am not anymore and who I can’t ever be again!” 

“You’re not a different person just because you-”

“You don’t get it! I AM a different person, Jason. I can’t turn at will without being in unimaginable pain. I can’t fly, I can’t look at myself sometimes. There are days I hate this body so much, I don’t get up during daylight and hunt criminals viciously during the dark hours of the night. I never used to feel so much hate. Never used to feel so feral before they did this to me!”  
He’s never told anyone how bad his bad days really are, and he’s not sure that he is glad that he has told Jason just now. 

“Boy, you have issues,” Jason says, running a hand through his hair. 

Dick chokes out a laugh. “Yeah, I do.” But really, what do they expect? 

“So, you want to only have sex in the dark now?” Jason asks. 

“Do you get off on my scars?” Dick replies. 

There is a split second Dick sees Jason think about lying to him, but in the end he nods. “Yeah, I do.” 

Why, Dick thinks. Why would Jason get off on his scars? On these reminders of torture and humiliation? He gets up and paces the room. He wants to fly. He wants to fly so badly, he thinks about turning here and now and just leaving Jason here with the half-eaten food and this fucked up conversation. “Why? Because you won’t ever have any? And neither will John? Because our bodies are so hard to damage in this form?” 

“Bruce has scars too.”

“Bruce is human!” Dick says sharply, because it’s different and he knows it. Jason knows it too. It doesn’t have anything to do with what he’s feeling for Dick, why he gets off on _Dick’s_ scars. 

“They remind me that you are a survivor, Dick, that you will always come back and-”

“And?” Dick asks, because there is something else underneath this, something darker, something more Jason. 

“And I like to know that something can hurt you, that something can leave marks on you.” 

“I was tortured Jason,” Dick says quietly. 

“I know. I know it’s fucked up, but every time I see them I want to be that person who left them on you…I-” he stops and doesn’t look at Dick. 

Dick has absolutely no idea what to think. Jason is always so careful with him, always so gentle and playful, but deep down he still wants to hurt and lash out. “You love me more because I’m not perfect anymore in your eyes?” 

“I guess,” he shrugs. 

“What do you want to do to me?” Dick asks. 

“Don’t,” Jason warns. 

“I know you won’t do anything I don’t give you permission to do, Jason. I just want to know.” 

“No, Dick. You really don’t.” 

“Tell me what you were thinking about on the rooftop? Because I know you wanted to be inside me, to-”

“I wanted to fuck you,” Jason interrupts. 

“I know,” Dick says.

“No, you don’t. Because it’s such a common term for sex, that all the implications are lost in translation. But what I wanted to do is push you down on your stomach, face first, grab your neck and fuck you without a care, with reckless abandon, without-”

“Any regard to what I’m feeling or if I like it?” Dick cuts in, taking a step back. He’s not exactly shocked, he thinks, but he is definitely something. 

“Maybe? Your goodness and vulnerability bring the feral part out in me. Sometimes,” he amends.  

“I don’t think I can give you that,” Dick replies. 

“I know. And it doesn’t matter. I would never do anything you aren’t comfortable with.” 

“And you have that kind of sex with John? And Bruce?” 

“You really want me to answer these questions?” Jason asks. 

Dick shakes his head. He doesn’t really want to know the details. It would probably spook him. “So, I am the only one you’re tender with?” He really doesn't know how he feels about this.

“You’re the only one I let be tender in return,” Jason says. It sounds a bit like a confession. 

“Oh…” And Dick likes that, when they are playing around, when they touch gently to arouse, he likes it when Jason brings new things into the bedroom. Like toys and the camera. He doesn’t want to watch himself, but it aroused him to think about Jason watching him touch himself. 

“I like being gentle and playful with you, Dick, because you’re so fucking responsive to every single touch.” He grins. “You could probably get off on just kissing if we’d do it long and filthy enough.” 

Dick thinks he would like to try that. “Would you like that?” 

Jason shrugs. “Sure. What you don’t get is that I mostly get off on you enjoying yourself, Dick. Figuring out what you like and what not, how you get off on things, certain words, how far your curiosity takes you, it’s all a turn on for me. Would be pretty much for any sane being. You like being touched and it shows and I like to touch you.”

Dick bites his lip again. It makes sense, it makes so much sense and Jason has John and Bruce to play rough with. “You don’t miss other things when you have sex with me?” 

“I get it elsewhere, that shouldn’t concern you, Dick.” 

Dick nods.  
   
~+~  
“We’re not going to only kiss today, right?” Jason asks between kisses. 

Dick smiles. “And if that’s what I want to do?” 

“Then we’ll do that and I will go home with really blue balls,” Jason answers.

Dick wants to say that he could go to Bruce and John, or find someone in a nightclub. A nice or naughty girl with whom he could get off, but he doesn’t. He wants Jason to stay.  
“Did you talk to Bruce? About the serum?” Jason asks, running his hands over Dick’s back, there aren’t that many scars there. It’s mostly his arms, legs, and chest. 

“No,” Dick answers. 

Jason sits up, but keeps his hand under Dick’s shirt. “Why not?” 

Truth is, Bruce has called and Dick just hadn’t picked up. He’s afraid that it might work on Jason but not on him. Because his body is messed up, has been changed in a way Jason’s hasn’t. Dick doesn’t dare to hope.  
“Can we not talk about it?” He asks. 

“Dick, you just exploded all over me about how much you hate this body and not being able to fly. And now you tell me you didn’t talk to Bruce about the serum. The only thing that can help you. I think we really should pause the sex and work on the issues today. It seems the time for it.” 

“I don’t want to talk about it! I think we have done enough talking for today. I can only bare my soul and fears for so long.” 

“Dick-”

“Maybe you should go now,” Dick says. 

Jason’s hands tighten a fraction. “Seriously?” 

“Yes,” Dick answers, brushing Jason’s hands away. 

Jason nods, getting up. He doesn’t go. He just stands there, looking down at Dick in his bed of cushions, pillows, and blankets. “You’re never going to buy a bed, are you?”

“No,” Dick replies, because he won’t. He likes them okay, but he likes his nest more. In everything he does, he will always be more bird than human. No matter the form he has to walk in. 

“I like this about you too,” Jason says gently.  
Suddenly Dick isn’t sure he wants Jason to leave. And of course Jason can sense that. Like a shark senses blood, Jason can sense uncertainty, fear, hesitation. That’s why he is so good at what he’s doing. “Dick-”

“Two options, okay?” 

“I’m listening,”  Jason says. 

“One we go up to the roof and play around in the dirt, secondly we go up to the roof and have some ice-cream.” 

“You really dig the freezer, don’t you?” Jason asks, with a look at the monster that is taking most of the space up in Dick’s kitchen.  

Dick smiles. “I do. I love it. I love that food stays fresh for a long, long time. And I love that I can have pastries whenever I wish and ice-cream as well.” He gets up from the floor in one smooth motion and rubs his neck. “So?” 

“Grab the ice-cream, Dick.”  
   
~+~  
It seems to Dick, that all they have been doing lately is having some kind of sex. But this is nice too. Just lying on the rooftop in the shadows and eating ice-cream with Jason. They haven’t done this since they were younger. When they had been birds. Grabbing whatever sweet treat they could find or steal and settle down somewhere high to eat it in peace.  
And up here it smells like tomatoes and basil and something sweet that comes from the flowers he has planted. Not like the city at all. 

“Do you do that often?” Jason asks. 

“As often as I can.”

“It’s nice. Peaceful and the sky seem endless,” Jason says, eating his ice-cream rather seductively. 

“Stop messing with me,” Dick replies, turning away so he doesn’t have to look at Jason’s messy, delicious looking mouth. 

“I like messing with you,” Jason says, scooting closer. 

Dick can feel his breath on his skin and if he leans back a bit he could feel Jason’s cool lips…and if he turns around he could taste the ice-ream on them and inside Jason’s mouth. “You know, there are a lot of different, interesting things you can do with ice-cream besides eating it.”  
Dick bites his lip and keeps quite.  
“I like to play with food sometimes. Especially with something cold…” he continues. “Like an ice-cube-”

“Jason!” 

Jason laughs. Dick wonders if Jason would want that ice-cube inside his mouth, his own mouth or…somewhere else. He tries to suppress a shiver at the thought alone. It makes him feel hot. He finishes his own ice-cream before Jason’s ideas start to become good ones.  
“We don’t play with food. I taught you better than that.” 

“I always liked to play with it and I never said I don’t eat it, Dick,” Jason replies, grabbing Dick by the neck and turning him so they can kiss. “I really want to know if you can come from kissing alone…maybe the slightest bit of rubbing? Hmm? We know for sure that you can come from having something nice and slim shoved up your ass. My fingers would do too, I guess.”

“They would,” Dick says. “I like your fingers, they’re warm and wiggle…” Dick grins. 

“Is the toy too hard?” 

“It’s good, but it’s different, it’s not as flexible, on the other hand you fingers don’t…vibrate,” Dick answers. 

Jason tackles him into the cushions and kisses him again. “They certainly don’t.” 

Dick slings his arms around Jason’s neck and drags him down, so he can feel Jason’s body against his, on his, pushing him down and keeping him there. Jason’s t-shirt is a bit damp from sweat. It’s really hot up here. Dick doesn’t care. Jason is a big solid blanket and Dick needs to feel this now. 

“You should take John out for ice-cream some time. I think he would like that,” Dick says. 

“Maybe we should all go and take Tim too,” Jason replies. 

“Ah, just the Robins, yes.” Dick replies, kisses Jason’s cheek and closes his eyes. He can feel Jason sag against him, his body relaxing. Dick is making him nap for a bit now and then…maybe when it’s less hot in the evening they can try some more ice-cream related dirty talk.


	15. Tag am Meer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Robins being brotherly makes me happy. Also: Dick and Jason have creative sex in the shower.

**Tag am Meer**  
 _(Day on the beach)_  
   
“To be honest,” Tim says, letting his feet dangle over the edge of the pier, “Bruce is pretty much caught between being really pissed off and really relieved.” 

“He’ll get over it,” Jason says, throwing a grape in the air and catching it with his mouth. 

“I know he will, but it was still really reckless to steal from Wayne Enterprises…the shitstorm alone in that department,” John throws in. 

“And I’m sorry I caused good people grief,” Jason says as sincerely as he can. Part of him is sorry about it, but the bigger part can still feel the wind against his feathers. He dreams about it sometimes and he wakes up, aching to jump out of the window. 

“As you should,” Dick says gently. He’s the only one not eating ice-cream, but a pastry instead. His lips look like they taste sweet. Jason restrains himself and doesn’t kiss Dick silly. They’re in public and children are running around. And some of the mothers surely read the article in the Planet about them. The article with the family photo. What the fuck had they been thinking, posing for that anyway? At least it’s not online anywhere. Tim had made sure of that. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Jason waves it away. “But he is happier that it worked, right?” 

“Yes,” Tim nods. “He wants you to come in and test the new batch. He’s also glad you were smart enough to take a blood sample afterwards, even if he is grumbling that it wasn’t soon enough…”

“I was occupied,” Jason replies with a leer. 

Tim rolls his eyes. “Sure you were. I do not want to know.” 

“But it’s our duty as big brothers to traumatize you with epic detailed sex-tales,” Jason says. 

John snickers. “And we could…”

Tim kicks him for his trouble. Dick laughs. This is nice, Jason thinks. This had been a fucking great idea. 

“It’s not like our baby-bird is a virgin anymore,” Dick throws in. 

“Yeah…” Jason says, ruffling Tim’s hair. “He’s all grown up and banging a hot older woman.” 

Tim gives him a look. Jason shoves a sticky, caramel covered grape in his mouth before he can say anything. Tim glares, but only a bit. “Hmm, that is really good,” he says and opens his mouth again. 

“Awww…” John says. “Like old times.” 

Hmm, Jason thinks, yeah, like old times. He had fed Tim sometimes, just for the fun of it or to piss him off, but mostly it had been nice, just like it is now. And fun. Jason feeds him another sticky grape. 

“Give me one too,” Dick says, leaning over John and opening his mouth. Jason swallows and places a grape delicately on Dick’s tongue, then watches it disappear between Dick’s lips. 

“Good god,” Tim says, he sounds a bit breathless and scandalized, and then he laughs. “I’ve never seen it before, because you know, I only have eyes for Miss Carrie, but fuck it all. Dick…” he looks at Dick then. “You are erotic poetry in motion.”  
Dick blushes. Of all things, Jason thinks, this makes him blush. 

“Uhm…thank you.” 

“You are welcome, Dick,” Tim says, grinning at him. 

They eat their desserts in silence after that, watching people on the beach.  
   
~+~  
Jason likes feeling the earth underneath his feet and it’s no different with sand. He kicks at it a bit, suppressing the urge to destroy a kid’s sandcastle. John is standing beside him as they watch Tim and Dick play in the water. 

“This was a good idea,” John says. 

“I know.” 

“Did you come up with it all alone?” John teases. 

“Dick did. Of course.” 

“Of course,” John says, leaning into him. He feels warm and a bit damp. Jason turns to kiss the top of his head. “They look happy.”

“Tim is,” Jason replies. 

“But Dick isn’t,” it’s not a question at all. 

“Right now? He is. But he has really bad days. He needs to talk to Bruce about the serum, John. They need to fix this. He’s born to fly. This is…this was never supposed to happen.” 

“I know. But I can’t make Dick do anything he doesn’t want to do. You of all people should know that,” John says. “But I’ll talk to him anyway. And to Bruce.”

“Sometimes I have the urge to steal the new and improved serum and slip it to Dick.”

“Don’t,” John says. 

“I wouldn’t. It would mess him up. I just don’t get why he’s hesitating. It worked fine on me. No pain at all. It was odd, but not painful,” Jason whispers. He can hear the longing in his own voice and focuses on Dick and Tim in the water again. 

“Maybe it’s because he remembers all too well how it was when they made him, when they put all those drugs in his system. Maybe it’s because this doesn’t feel like his body, maybe he’s just afraid that his body’s chemistry is too messed up for it to work properly,” John says. Jason hadn’t even considered half of those reasons, but then he’s more of a hands on type of guy. “I’m going to try the new serum this weekend, under supervision,” he adds after a short silence. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yeah…at the Manor, on the grounds. I want you to take it with me. I want to fly with you Jason.” 

“And have mad passionate sex after?” Jason asks. 

John slaps him, but then he smiles. “Maybe.” 

“What is Bruce saying about that?” 

“Bruce loves mad passionate sex,“ John answers and then, “He loves you, no matter your differences. He loves you and wants you to be happy, Jason.” 

“Sometimes I wonder, you know? If I don’t make him unhappy the way I am. If I am any good for him. I mess around with people. I let people down. I constantly clash with his morals and ideology. I’m sleeping with Dick… I bet he didn’t think it would be this way when we first seduced him.”

“Did you think it would be this way?” John asks gently.  

“No.” 

“No one can tell these things. We’re just people. Life happens and it would be stupid to hold on to things that don’t feel right,” John says. “You are mine and Bruce is mine, but you and Bruce; that is a whole other deal. Jason,” he sighs and turns to bury his head against Jason’s shoulder. “You are the most human of us all.” 

Jason nods. He knows that. It shows in his reckless and selfish behaviour. “I still want to have sex with Bruce and a part of me will always love him, but I don’t think this is working like it used to.” 

“I know,” John says. “I think he knows too.” 

“He probably will want me to be his son-”

“Which would mean that he won’t be sleeping with you anymore…” John interrupts, biting his lip. 

“Which will not work for me. I need…” he swallows. 

“I know. We’ll figure this out. Don’t worry. He still loves you too. It doesn’t change that much that you’re falling in love with someone else.” 

“I’m not-” he stops. Well, fuck. He thinks, looking at Dick laughing and splashing and being happy. Well, fuck, when did this happen? He had always had a thing for Dick, had been aware of it too, but he had a thing for a lot of people. Dick had raised him, he loves Dick, but he… Well, fuck he has fallen in love with Dick. Is still falling in love with Dick, while falling out of love with Bruce. 

“It’s fine. Don’t freak out over it now,” John smiles. 

“I’m not freaking out over it,” Jason says, but it’s totally a lie. 

“Hmmm,” John replies. “Will you come over on Saturday to fly with me?”

“Yes,” Jason says. 

“Good.” 

Jason is not so sure. His motives aren’t as pure as they should be.  
   
~+~  
Dick is burying his toes in the sand. Jason’s never been as fascinated by toes and fingers as John is, but he can admit that Dick’s toes look vulnerable. Sometimes everything about Dick looks vulnerable. 

He’s wearing shorts and a t-shirt with longer sleeves to cover most of his scars. There aren’t any below his knees, but there are a few right behind his knees. Jason itches to run his fingers against that skin, maybe kiss the scars there too. He wonders how Dick would react to that kind of touch, seduction? Caress? 

“Take me home?” Dick asks, not turning to look at Jason. 

“I think I should give you a key, because there is no way I can leave the windows open like you do at your place,” Jason answers. 

“Is that a yes?” Dick asks. 

“Of course. Feeling a bit horny?” 

Dick turns to him then and gives him a look, he can’t quite interpret. “Maybe,” he answers. 

“Maybe just isn’t good enough,” Jason grins. This is simple, being the one to push a bit, to talk dirty, to seduce. He doesn’t have to think about this part with Dick. This part comes easy. 

“Taking Tim home,” John says, coming closer, playing with a shell. 

“Little Wing tired?” Jason teases. 

“Fuck you, Jason,” Tim throws in. He has ice-cream. Two cones. One for himself and one probably for Dick. 

“Don’t,” Dick cuts in with a laugh. 

Jason closes his mouth. “Fine, but only because he has ice-cream.”

“For Dick.” 

“I can share,” Dick replies softly. 

“You can have it all,” Jason says. 

Dick gives him another look. Jason isn’t in the mood to share his feelings. He's in the mood to take Dick home and fuck him against a wall…but that won’t happen. 

“Well, I’ll eat it alone then,” Dick replies. 

Tim nudges Dick with his shoulder. “It’s your favourite anyway, because you are my favourite,” he says. 

Dick, it seems, is everyone’s favourite. 

“Do you need a ride home, Jason?” John asks.

“Nah, Dick parked the bike a bit away. He's taking me back to my place for-”

“More ice-cream,” Tim cuts in. 

Dick laughs. “Yeah, for that.”  
   
~+~  
“I do have ice-cream,” Jason says against Dick’s lips. He can feel Dick’s laugh against his mouth. 

“I have sand between my toes and really need a shower,” Dick replies. 

“Ice-ream later then?” 

Dick bites his lip. “You did promise me a tour last time I was here…”

“You’ve seen my shower Dick. You’ve used my shower.” 

“Yeah, but I hear it’s more fun to share things.” 

Jason laughs again and Dick surges forward and kisses him, rubs against him and Jason’s hands slip under Dick’s shirt on their own accord. Jason slides it up slowly and feels Dick tense. “I’ve seen you naked, I will see you naked in the shower Dick…”

“I know, don’t mind me, get me out of these clothes?” 

“Can do that,” Jason answers and does just that. He throws the shirt over his shoulder and hooks his fingers teasingly into Dick’s shorts, plays with the waistband a bit before he slides them down. “I really want to suck you off right now. I bet you taste like the ocean…” he breathes against Dick’s skin and slides to his knees. 

Dick’s hands are restless before they settle on Jason’s shoulders. “The ocean doesn’t taste that great, Jason.” 

Jason laughs against Dick’s hipbone, his fingers tighten a bit on Dick’s thighs, just under his ass. “You do.” He kisses a trail from Dick’s hipbone, following the biggest scar down, his hands running down Dick’s legs until they catch in the hollow of Dick’s knees. And the curiosity about those patches of flesh is spiked again. Jason stands up smoothly and kisses Dick and then he lets go of Dick for the few moments it takes to pull off his own clothes. He grabs Dick’s hand, dragging him to the bathroom. 

 

~+~  
Going down on Dick is always a fucking pleasure, because he’s so responsive, but Jason’s mind wanders to the hollow of his knees again. He turns Dick around and sinks to his knees. 

“Can you keep yourself steady?” Jason asks, he is only half joking, but he doesn’t want for Dick to slip and hurt himself. 

“Yeah…” 

“Good,” Jason says. He runs his fingers gently over every scar he can reach starting at Dick’s hip, down over the curve of his ass, and to the soft skin of his inner thighs. And then he does it again, with his lips, and again with his tongue, until Dick’s breathing heavier. His hips moving restlessly.  
Jason gives in then to the desire to press his thumb against the hollow of Dick’s knee and Dick’s breath hitches. “Dick?” 

“I’m okay…I’m okay…just didn’t except that.” 

“Hmm…” Jason replies, his lips are already pressed against the scars there. “You only taste faintly of the ocean now, you know? It’s nice…”

Dick laughs, but it sounds a bit shaky and a lot turned on. Jason’s digs his thumbs in on both sides and Dick’s knees buckle, and lock. He kisses Dick’s thigh and then proceeds to kiss upwards again, tasting clean water and not much else anymore. The water makes his lips rub, instead of slide, against Dick’s skin. It’s a whole other sensation. He curses a bit because he didn’t think about lube and water is not good for fucking. No good at all. He rubs a finger gently against Dick’s hole and Dick tenses. No, not gonna work at all. 

“Jason?” 

“Forgot the lube, not sure I want to get out of the shower. Thinking about ways to get you off…” He kisses Dick’s ass again and then bites one cheek gently. “Sucking your pretty dick is pretty much the only option at this point,” he muses. 

“I’m fine with that…” Dick says. 

Jason smiles. “Yeah, you would be.” He lets Dick turn around again, the water makes his eyelashes seem even thicker and his hair is a mess, but there’s something about water, Jason thinks, something that really turns him on. “Give me the showerhead,” he instructs. 

“Okay,” Dick says, reaching over his head and then handing Jason the showerhead. 

“Let’s try something…hmm?” Jason asks. He’s never tried it with a guy before, but the girls had liked the pressure of the stream against their clits or asses, inner thighs even, well enough. It could work for Dick too. “Spread your legs a bit,” he says as he adjusts the pressure. 

Dick does. It’s always the most erotic thing to see Dick spread his legs. It’s like slow motion for Jason, he can’t look away. “Tell me if you don’t like it, or of it doesn’t do anything for you and I’ll gladly suck you off the old fashioned way.” 

“Okay…” Dick says, looking down at him. 

Jason doesn’t know if he wanted to say more because he chooses that moment to place the showerhead just a bit away from Dick’s inner thigh, it’s a tease, the hard stream wandering up and down and then as Dick spreads his legs a bit wider, he lets it massage the underside of Dicks cock, graze his balls and tease at his hole. 

“Oh…” Dick moans. 

Jason smiles. Yeah, he thinks, pretty fucking sensitive. He leans in then to lick Dick’s cock, suck and kiss at the tip only while the hard stream does the rest. Dick’s hands grab his shoulders hard. Jason’s free hand runs over his leg to that secret place with the small scar again, and he presses down. Dick comes suddenly with a muffled groan. Jason is tempted to pull away, but doesn’t. He spits when Dick is still coming down from his orgasm, with his eyes closed.  
   
~+~  
“I’m going flying with John on Saturday,” Jason says, painting imaginary circles on Dick’s back. 

“Hmm…” Dick sounds sleepy. 

“You should come too,” he continues. 

“Hmm…” Dick replies. 

Jason rests his head on Dick’s shoulder. “Is that a promise?” He asks and knows it’s a bit unfair with Dick being orgasm-stupid, fucked out, mellow, and nearly asleep to ask the question. But sometimes Red Hood has to do what Red Hood has to do. 

“What?” 

“Is it a promise Dick?”

“Yes, sure.”

“Holding you to that, Dick.”

“Hmmm…” Dick says and Jason kisses his shoulder.


	16. Unsicherheit

**Unsicherheit**  
 _(uncertainty)_

“Dick,” Bruce says. There is a small smile curving his lips. He’s always so pleased when Dick makes it back from New York home. The lost son…but Dick doesn’t think of himself that way. He doesn’t even think of Jason that way, even if he is pretty sure Bruce does.

“I hope you don’t mind,” Dick replies.

“No, I don’t. I’m glad you made it.” He looks at Jason then. “Jason.”

“B,” Jason replies. “I’m gonna say hello to Alfred and leave you two alone to go over the details.”

Dick shoots him a look. “Traitor,” he mouths. Jason grins.

“We need to talk, Dick,” Bruce says.

“I know,” Dick answers and follows Bruce into the library.  
   
~+~  
The library smells like home. Dick misses the smell of old leather and even older books. He curls up in one of the two green armchairs and looks out of the window. The garden looks a bit overgrown on this side of the manor.

“John is going to take the serum today and Jason has already taken it once,” Bruce begins.

“And you’re wondering why I haven’t,” Dick interrupts.

“Yes. I am wondering. I continued the research so we could help you Dick. You never wanted to be human. This was done to you.”

“I know. But that’s just the thing, I’m not the person I used to be. My body is messed up. We don’t know how much my body chemistry has been altered. I mean…” he bites his lip. He isn’t sure he should tell Bruce about the pollen-thing. It shouldn’t have affected him as much as it did. It clearly burned through Jason’s system faster and he wasn’t as affected by it as Dick had been at the time.

“We can find it out Dick. Don’t you want to fly again?”

Dick nods. He does want to fly again. Does he want to be a bird for good? He’s not sure. “I…that is not the only thing it could do. I can change at will now. I am in a lot of pain when I do, but I can stay a bird…” What is it that keeps him here? That keeps him human. He wonders about that. He could just change and leave.

“Dick,” Bruce asks gently. “Are you in pain after the transformation too?”

Dick doesn’t look at him, but he nods. He is, it’s not so bad, or maybe he’s just learned to live with it and it always fades to a dull ache once he’s back to human form, but Dick suspects that if he stayed a bird long enough, he could live pain-free.  
“It’s different now, you know? Being human. I think it messed me up. Not only my body, but my soul.”

“You are still an amazing person, Dick.”

Dick smiles at him. “Thank you, but you didn’t know me long enough to really get this, Bruce. I feel so much anger now and I feel lost in that anger sometimes. I want to hurt people… I never wanted anything like that before. Never felt that way before. When I was a bird, when we all were, life was less complicated.”

“Is this about how you feel about Jason?” Bruce asks.

Maybe, Dick thinks. He’s never considered sex before. In his bird-form he loves them all the same, but after the Ivy incident things have changed between him and Jason. The love he’s feeling for Jason is shifting. He wants to touch Jason all the time and there is this undercurrent of desire to everything they do. It’s like a live wire.  
“It’s about me being afraid, Bruce,” Dick replies in a whisper. “I am very, very afraid.”

“Of it working?”

“Yes and no. It’s hard to explain, I guess. I think I would be tempted to leave again when I could be only a bird. But thinking about leaving you all hurts.” He closes his eyes. “I feel torn, but I’m glad the serum can help Jason and John. They deserve to be able to fly, even if they have to take drugs to do it.” 

“Said like that, it sounds very irresponsible of me to let them,” Bruce says.

Dick laughs. “Sleeping with your adopted sons would be considered very irresponsible, Bruce.”

“I am a complicated man.”

“Yes, you are,” Dick replies, getting up in a one fluid motion and stretching. He crosses over to where Bruce is sitting and kisses the top of his head. “Thank you for trying to fix me, but I am not sure I want to be fixed.”

“Dick-” Bruce says, grabbing his hand.

“Come on, they’re waiting for us and are most likely concerned by now,” Dick says, tugging lightly until Bruce lets go of his hand.  
   
~+~  
Alfred made worm-salad, the one with the strawberries as well and Jason’s favorite cookies: peanut butter and white chocolate.  
Tim had brought Miss Carrie. Right now she’s sipping ice-tea and chatting with Alfred. It’s a good thing she has seen all of them naked at some point. Except for John, but well, that is about to change. She waves at Dick and smiles her beautiful smile and he waves back, she waves harder, he waves back madly with both hands and she puts her tea down and sinks back in her chair laughing. He can imagine her as a mother. It makes him happy for Tim.  
Dick smiles, turning his gaze to John who is eying the small glass with the serum with suspicion.

“It tastes like cherries,” Jason says smiling at him.

John smiles back. “They changed the formula a bit. Maybe it tastes like peaches now.”

“Fox likes cherries,” Bruce throws in.

John shrugs. “I like cherries too.”

“Ready to do this?” Jason asks, already stripping.

John hands Tim the glass and strips as well. “Yeah.”  
   
~+~  
Dick sits down in the grass with Miss Carrie and just watches his family fly.

“They look so beautiful,” she whispers.

“They look happy,” Dick says.

“Yes, that too,” she replies, and after a short pause, “I’m sorry for what happened to you, Dick.”

Dick nods, he doesn’t know what to say to that. It’s not her fault. She reaches out tentatively and brushes her fingers against his. “I’m fine.”

“Why aren’t you up there then? With them?”

Because he’s not fine. He feels jealous that he can’t be up there without being in pain. And he feels horrible for feeling jealous, because a solution has been offered to him.  
“Being human is such a messy thing,” Dick says.

She nudges his shoulder with hers. She smells like apples. Not the real kind, but artificial – must be her shampoo. It’s still nice. “Yes, it is, Dick,” she replies.  
   
~+~  
“Works like a charm, B,” Jason says.

“I will tell that to Mr Fox.”

“You had fun…” Dick says, brushing sweaty hair out of Jason’s eyes.

“Yeah…” Jason answers.

Tim and Miss Carrie have already disappeared and Dick wonders if Jason will go with John and Bruce or if he’ll take Dick home. But then Dick doesn’t feel like having sex and Jason so obviously does. And besides: Dick’s been with Jason a lot the last few weeks. He’s sure John and Bruce miss him. Jason might miss the harder kind of sex too. “You should join John and Bruce in their bedroom,” he whispers.

“I thought I’d take you home and-”

Dick shakes his head. “I can see how restless you are. You need a good hard fuck and I can’t give you that.”

“Dick,” Jason says. “We’ve been over this.”

“And you said you’ll get it elsewhere. This is your elsewhere, Jason.” He kisses Jason gently and Jason will turn it into something heated and filthy in no time now. Dick pulls away first. “Go.”

“Jason?” John asks from the door to the library.

“I’m coming,” Jason replies. “You staying at my place?”

“No, I’m heading back to New York. I have a case I’m working on,” Dick replies.

“Okay…” He kisses Dick again and then dashes off.

Dick throws his head back and just breathes. He doesn’t know what to do with all these feelings he has since he first slept with Jason. And they’re only getting stronger. Right now he even feels a bit jealous that John, of all people and he loves John, can give Jason what he needs. It’s fucked up and he needs to get a grip. He’s never imagined it to turn out like this when he first took John in. Maybe he’s becoming too human.

“Master Dick,” Alfred says gently.

“Yeah?” Dick asks, smiling.

“Maybe you would like to join me for tea in the kitchen?”

“Sure,” Dick replies. He could also eat something too, before he drives home. And Alfred has always been good company. Besides in the kitchen he won’t be able to hear them fuck as it’s further away from the library.  
   
~+~  
“I packed you lunch and something sweet. You seem too thin.”

“I’m a vigilante, Alfred, I need to be fit and look good in my suit.”

“Yes, your suit doesn’t leave much to the imagination,” Alfred replies with a smile in his eyes.

“People seem to like it…”  

“You are an attractive young man,” Alfred says earnestly.

And that’s just it, isn’t it, Dick thinks. He had never been meant to be an attractive young man. “If I would change for good what do you think would happen?”

“Crime in New York would be higher again,” Alfred replies.

Dick nods. “Yeah…”

“Your family would be fine. They want you to be happy, Master Dick.”

“What about Jason?” Dick asks, playing with the container with his brownies.

“He wants you to be happy too, Master Dick.”

“Yeah,” Dick says and lets Alfred hug him lightly.

“He was always the most human of you all,” Alfred says.

“And I was the least human of us all?”

“It’s your goodness, Master Dick. A rare find in humans today.”

“Take care, Alfred,” Dick says as Alfred hands him the rest of the food-containers.

“You too, Master Dick.”  
   
~+~  
It’s late and dark when Dick arrives home. He puts the food in the fridge without switching the light on and makes his way to the rooftop. It’s a warm night. He steps onto the railing barefoot, spreads his arms and closes his eyes. This is his life now in a nutshell: balancing on the edge. He feels someone move in the dark and opens his eyes.

“That’s pretty reckless,” the woman says, eating a tomato.

“Are you stealing from me?” Dick asks.

She shrugs. “I got hungry and no one was home.” She winks at him.

Somehow he doesn’t think that a closed door would stop her. There is something feline about her that fascinates the human in him, but repulses the bird.  
“This is New York. There is always something that’s open,” Dick points out.

She makes a face. “This stuff is good. You grow it yourself?”

“Yes,” Dick replies, rubbing a leaf between his fingers.

“You shouldn’t do that. The plant is toxic.” 

“I know. I’m not eating the leaves – or the green tomatoes.”

“You can fry them, they’re pretty tasty,” she replies, coming closer.   
Dick takes a step back on the railing. He isn’t afraid to fall and his balance is perfect as ever. He just doesn’t want that stranger to be in his personal space. “Usually men like it when I come closer.”

“There are always exceptions to the rule. Seems I am one.”

She steps closer again and then lunges for him, he sidesteps her. “Damn, you’re good at this.”

“I like playing rooftop-tag with my brothers,” Dick replies smiling.

She grins and throws one small yellow tomato at him. He catches it effortlessly. “You’re it,” she says just before she jumps from the rooftop. Dick is this close to following her, but he’s only wearing boxers and a t-shirt. He eats the tomato instead.


	17. Die Katze und der Kanarienvogel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder: still taking prompts :)

**Die Katze und der Kanarienvogel**  
 _(The cat and the canary)_

“You are no fun,” she says. He can feel her chest moving against his as her breathing calms down.

“No?” He asks. He’s chased her in civvies for seventeen blocks. He holds up a tomato.

She grins opening her mouth. Dick steps back from her. She is still freaking him out, but he also likes to play rooftop tag with her. He lets the tomato fall between her lips. “I’m it, I guess,” she says.

“Yeah.”

“You’re a strange one. Here you have me pinned to the wall, my breasts pressing against you and you do nothing.”

“What if I’m just not into girls?” He asks.

She looks him over. “Hmm…didn’t ping me as gay, didn’t ping me as anything really,” she says it as if she just realized it herself.

He shrugs. “That’s how I roll.”

She laughs. “And you’re wasting your talents. You should do something with that body of yours.”

“I’m scandalized you would propose such a thing, milady,” Dick teases.

“You don’t even know what I am proposing,” she teases back. “Or you would be even more scandalized.”

He laughs. It echoes in the deserted hallway he caught her in. “I doubt it.” He knows what she’s doing. Not what she’s doing right here, in New York, right now. But what she’s doing in general. Nightwing should really be on her case, but Dick loves to play rooftop tag. It’s a complicated life he’s leading.  
She smirks at him before her phone rings. He steps away, not wanting to listen in, even if he knows Batman would be disappointed as hell. Batman doesn’t have to know. She hasn’t stolen anything yet. Maybe she’s visiting her aunt like she has claimed she does. Maybe Dick isn’t one of the bird-people and a vigilante… Whatever. People have secrets. And not everyone is lucky enough to have a Bruce Wayne to take an interest in them.

“Have to go, Richard,” she says as she comes back, pocketing her phone.

“It’s okay, I won.”

“For tonight,” she says, leaning in and Dick leans away, avoiding her kiss.

She shakes her head. “Fast, gorgeous, fun to be around, but also weird.”

“Intriguing?” Dick prompts.

“Yeah, that too. Catch you later,” she says, and jumps out of a busted window.  

Dick is very aware he’s playing with fire. After all, it’s the cat that ate the canary…not the other way around.  
   
~+~  
Dick doesn’t stop. When he has the time and catches her shadow on a rooftop he just runs up and chases after her. On some nights she is chasing him. Like tonight. He has been aware of someone following him since he left the drug-store seven minutes ago. The groceries aren’t big or heavy, but they would slow him down a bit in the bag, so he pockets them and starts running.  
She ambushes him in front of his building.

“That is cheating,” he says as he catches the tomato that she just threw at his head. It’s one of his, it’s always one of his.

“No, it’s not. You were grocery shopping, so you had to go home at some point and I know where you live, Richard,” she replies, stepping out of the shadows. She’s always wearing black and when she steps out of the darkness she reminds him a bit of Bruce. It’s the stalking and lurking around thing they have going on, he thinks.

“Well, put like that,” he admits. It was a smart move to wait for him here.

“You’re it then,” she says and makes to leave.

“So, want to come up and have tea?” Dick asks before he can lose his nerve. He’s never made friends on his own before and even if Selina isn’t a friend Bruce would approve of, Dick likes her.  

“You know with any other guy I would know for sure what he’ll want from me. You,” she turns to look at him fully again. “You are still a mystery Richard.”

He’s sure she has had him investigated. He’s pretty sure she knows he’s one of Bruce’s sons. That he has money. After the family picture in the Planet, there aren’t that many people around who aren’t aware. Especially in her profession. The thing he doesn’t know is why she’s playing rooftop tag with him instead of robbing him blind. Or trying to get to Bruce through him.  
“I’m just a regular guy-”

“Right,” she cuts in cocking her head. “Lead the way.”  
   
~+~  
“I like this one,” she says nodding in the direction of the painting Dick got from Jason.

“Yeah, I like it too,” Dick replies, handing her a mug of coffee. Turns out Selina is not a big fan of tea.

“You…don’t have a sofa,” she says looking around.

“Or a bed,” Dick adds. “Not that you would care about that.” He adds hastily.

She laughs. “You are adorable when flustered. You don’t make friends easily, do you?”

He shrugs. “I have brothers.”

“So, you don’t need friends?” Selina asks.

“I didn’t say that. They just don’t seem important to have,” he answers. But maybe he has friends, made them without really knowing. Alfred for one, Miss Carrie for another.

“And now?”

“I have fun playing with you.”

“Is that a pun, Richard?” She asks.

He smiles. “No, it isn’t and you know it.”

She nods. “Doesn’t look like anything I’ve seen before,” she says stepping in front of the canvas again.

“It’s not by anyone famous. Yet. Some local kid painted it.”

“And you bought it from them?”

“No, it was a gift,” Dick replies, stepping beside her and tracing the raised surface with a finger.

“Someone likes you.”

“Yeah, someone does.”

“So, what else are you doing for amusement? You don’t even have a TV.”

“I read, I grow vegetables and fruits. I play rooftop tag with pretty girls.”

“Aww…charming, Richard.”

“I wasn’t trying to be.” He admits.

“And that makes you even more charming,” she replies, nudging his shoulder with hers.  
   
~+~  
“You’re it,” Jason says, grabbing his wrist and spinning him around so his back is to the wall. He looks happy and like he wants to play. It’s all in his body language.  

Dick smiles. “Haven’t played that one in a long time-”

“With me,” Jason interrupts.

Dick bites his lip. It’s a quite night in New York and he just delivered a drug-dealer at Meier’s steps. He feels good. “I-” he wants to say Jason’s name, but they’re both suited up.

“It was never a game for two,” Jason says shrugging.

“I’m not interested in her,” Dick replies.  
Jason gives him a look. Dick can’t see his eyes under the helmet, but he can _feel_ the look. Oh, Dick thinks. He is interested, maybe not in a way other men are, but he does find her intriguing. Or he wouldn’t be playing rooftop tag.

“Right…”

“I’m done for tonight,” Dick says. He’s missed Jason. Jason has made himself rare the last few weeks. Ever since John took the serum and Dick hadn’t, hasn’t even made a decision about taking it. Maybe playing rooftop tag is a distraction. Maybe he just doesn’t like to think about it anymore.

“I hoped you would say that,” Jason replies, letting go of Dick and starts running. Dick follows.  
   
~+~  
When they arrive on Dick’s rooftop they’re sweaty and Dick is grinning and he knows that Jason is too under the helmet.  
They can’t go inside like this, because what if someone would see? But all Dick wants to do is tear off his mask and clothes and tumble into his nest of cushions with Jason.  
They make their way to the garage instead, change in Jason’s car and make their way up to Dick’s like normal people.  
   
~+~  
“You know who she is, right?” Jason asks.

Dick hands him a mug of coffee. It’s been a long night for Jason. He came all the way from Gotham to see Dick. Again. “I know.”

“And you don’t think it’s strange, that she is playing rooftop tag with you?”

“Me as in Dick Wayne, son of famous billionaire Bruce Wayne or the other thing?”

“As in son of the Gotham billionaire,” Jason answers.

“She could have been chasing you or John…”

“Right,” Jason says, leaning against the kitchen counter. “We are a tight knitted bunch back in Gotham. You are the estranged son. No one even knows what you’re doing, Dick.”

“You know what I’m doing here. Clark Kent knows for sure what I am doing here…”

“If he spies on people in his free time, you mean?” Jason grins.

Dick grins back. “Still. I am not estranged Jason. If someone is, it’s you. I haven’t seen you in weeks.”

“Had stuff to do.”

“Right,” Dick says in a slightly mocking tone.

“I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“Because you’re worried,” Dick realizes. “About Selina. And what her agenda is.”

“Women like her? Always have an agenda, Dick,” Jason replies.

Dick feels angry all of a sudden. He thought Jason was here to see him, because he’s missed Dick, but no. He isn’t here for that.  
“Did Bruce send you?”

“Really Dick? You think I’m his errant boy or what? No, but I bet he will be concerned too.”

Which doesn’t make sense, Dick thinks. How did Jason know if Bruce doesn’t? “You were spying on me. I can’t believe-”

“What I can’t believe, Dick, is that you didn’t know I was in the city.”

“How long?”

“Last two days,” Jason says flatly.

“Two days. You’ve been here for two whole days without contacting me?” Dick wishes they’d just skipped the talking. Right now it seems that talking doesn’t do them any good.

“I saw you play rooftop tag in your civvies, Dick.”

“And you thought to stay in the shadows and lurk around would be a better idea than to actually come and see me?”

“I don’t trust her.”

“You should trust me,” Dick counters.

“Dick, you don’t even know what you want, because you’re too afraid to try it out!”

“Is this about Selina or the serum?” Dick asks.

“Both, I guess,” Jason replies.

“So you want me to take the serum and fuck Selina Kyle, do I understand this correctly?” Jason just looks at him. “Fuck you, Jason. Seriously. Just because it’s not what you want, doesn’t mean it’s wrong how I do it.”

“You don’t want to fuck her then?”

“I don’t want to fuck anyone!”

“Liar,” Jason says, coming closer. He looks like a big beast on the prowl. Any other person would shy away, but Dick knows him. He knows Jason would never hurt him. “But then,” Jason continues, “It’s more about someone fucking you, isn’t it?”

Dick suppresses the impulse to shove or hit him. “Why are you doing this?”

“Doing what?”

“Trying to piss me off,” Dick answers. “I thought you wanted to see me, spend time together. Because you missed me – or something.”

Jason runs a hand through his hair. “I don’t know…Shit with Bruce is rocky.”

“Really?”

“Rockier,” Jason says, and then, “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“So you make accusations instead?”

“Seems like it.” He grabs Dick’s wrists and pulls him close. “I did miss you.”

“Okay,” Dick says and lets Jason kiss him.   
   
~+~  
“Despite everything I said I am glad you’re making friends,” Jason says, running a finger over Dick’s back.

Dick likes that: his body sated, his face pressed into the cushions, Jason’s hands gently petting him. “Hmm.”

“And she is hot. I’d hit that,” Jason whispers into his ear.

Dick suppresses... something. Lately he isn’t sure he doesn’t care anymore if Jason is hooking up with strangers. He knows it’s what Jason does, because Jason likes sex with different people. And he knows Jason doesn’t love any of these faceless men and women, but still. Sharing Jason with strangers just doesn’t sit right anymore with Dick. On the other hand: he can’t give Jason what he wants and needs, so it would be selfish to demand that he stop hooking up with other people. 

“You should do it,” Jason says, interrupting Dick’s musing.

“What?”

“Hit that,” Jason answers. “I know you said you’re not interested or whatever, but you haven’t been with a woman, Dick.”

“And you think with all my issues, it would be a good idea to sleep with a woman like Kyle?” Dick asks, turning on his back so he can look up at Jason.

“Well…maybe not alone?” Jason says.

“Just don’t,” Dick replies.

“Dick-”

“You’re pushing and I know you mean well, but I don’t want to sleep with her, or anyone else.”

“You want to have sex with me.”

“Yes,” Dick replies. “Why does this scare you all of a sudden?”

“Sex doesn’t scare me, don’t be ridiculous.”

“Are you getting bored then?” The ‘with me’ doesn’t need to be said.

“No,” Jason says in a tone that means he’s done talking about this. “Do you have any food?”

“I have cinnamon buns, you need to heat them up,” Dick replies and suppresses the urge to prevent Jason from getting up and leaving, even if it’s only to go to the kitchen.

“You want one too?”

“Yes,” Dick replies. Sex with Jason always makes him hungry.    
   
~+~  
When Jason leaves the next afternoon he takes the stairs like a real person. Dick wonders what that says about them.  
He showers, cleans up his place, does the laundry (the cushions really need it) and then sits down in front of the painting and just looks at it until the lines and colors blur.  
He has no idea what he and Jason are doing. He suspects that Jason doesn’t either, but that it scares the hell out of Jason.  
Jason is always big on talking about Dick’s issues, but not so much about his own. He is honest when he wants to, but he can also shut people out like no other person Dick’s ever met. Including Bruce.  
He lets himself fall gently to the floor and stares up at the ceiling.  
Being human is really a lot more complicated than he thought. Maybe they would all be better off if Dick would take the serum and stay a bird.


	18. Der Versuch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dick and Jason are fixing their relationship. Kinda, sorta, maybe.

**Der Versuch**  
 _(the trial)_

Jason breaks a dealer’s arm whose selling stuff to kids and he doesn’t feel better at all, so he breaks the asshole’s nose too.  
Still.  
Too much stuff on his mind. Mostly Dick. He feels restless and he doesn’t like it much that Dick is playing rooftop tag with Selina Kyle. She just isn’t trustworthy. Not that Jason thinks Dick is naïve or stupid. Dick is smart and knows what he`s doing – but he’s never shown an interest in anybody really. Except for them, when he had taken them all in, collected them and made them into a family.  
Dick’s a good person. And that might be the problem.  
Jason is not. He doesn’t think he is a bad person, but he sure as hell can’t be called good either.   
Jason has no illusions about that.  
   
~+~  
“You did what?” John asks, putting his fork down. “Jason.” He sounds disappointed.

Well, it’s John. He always thinks better of people than they really are. “I know.”

“But how could you propose a threesome to Dick, Jason?” John asks. “With a woman and a thief.”

“Is it the woman or the thief part that you’re more scandalized about?” Jason asks.

John gives him a look. “Don’t joke about this, just because I don’t like women that way-”

“Yeah, yeah,” Jason cuts in. “I know. But he seems to like her. They’re playing rooftop tag.”

“We should do that again. “ John sips his tea and Jason waits. “You’re in love with Dick, right?”  
Jason nods. He is in love with Dick, has always been to some point, but after they had started sleeping together it just got worse or better, more for sure. “But we just don’t fit.”

“Sexually?” John asks, but it’s not a real question.

Jason nods again. He knows that Dick gets it, gets him, but he also knows that it’s starting to hurt Dick that Jason is hooking up with strangers. “I don’t think he will ever be able to play rough.”

John nods. “I don’t think so either. He doesn’t like mixing pleasure with pain. He just doesn’t like pain or feeling helpless.”

“I know,” Jason says. And he knows it has nothing to do with Dick not trusting him. It’s just that Dick doesn’t like it. And there are things that just don’t change. If you aren’t even the slightest bit inclined in that direction it won’t happen and Jason doesn’t want Dick to do things he doesn’t like to please him. He wouldn’t enjoy that either.

“You could stop hooking up with strangers and only be with Dick and us,” John says.

“I like sex with women,” Jason replies flatly. He would miss sex with women. He wonders if Bruce is missing sex with women since he’s fucking John and him. But maybe calling it fucking in John’s case isn’t fair to either of them. Bruce and John are clearly in love.

“Well, Dick doesn’t know if he likes sex with women. He doesn’t want to try it right now either. It’s a huge step for him to let you…do whatever you do,” John finishes with a smile.

“I know.” And that’s why this will never ever work. Not like John and Bruce are working or Tim and Miss Carrie, bless her.

“You and Dick will have to find your own way to get things done. So that you’re both happy,” John says, grabbing Jason’s hand and squeezing gently.

Sounds like a lot of work and fucked up conversations, Jason thinks.  
   
~+~  
“You’re it,” Jason says throwing a shuriken at her and missing her pretty cheek by about five inches. He hadn’t meant of course to hurt her.

She spins around. “Aren’t you far from home?” She asks coolly, but she's pissed off, he can see it and smiles under the hood. 

“Aren’t you?” He asks, casually.

“It’s none of your business what I’m doing here.”

“Maybe I’m making it my business now,” Jason replies.

“Wouldn’t Nightwing have something to say to that?”

Jason laughs. “He isn’t Batman. He likes having friends over and helping out cleaning up.”

She studies him and then picks the shuriken up. “Tag, hmmm?”

“It’s something to do,” Jason replies.

“Does the nice Richard Wayne have friends in high places?”

“Well, his last name is Wayne,” Jason answers, but he doesn’t like the speculating look in her eyes. She’s a smart one. Of course she is, Dick wouldn’t like a stupid person.

“Are you going to warn me off then?” She asks, throwing the shuriken back. Jason catches it effortlessly.

He wonders if that would help in the slightest. Probably not. “No. Just wanted to make sure you knew who you’ll piss off.”

“Dully noted.” She says jumping off the rooftop.  
   
~+~  
“I might have scared your new friend away,” Jason says instead of a greeting.

Dick rubs his hands on his pants to get the soil off and looks at him. Jason is sure he has known that Jason was there for some time now. “Are you jealous because I’m making friends? Because I remember you telling me to give people a chance,” Dick replies.

Jason had said that, but back then they hadn’t been so tangled together. He should have stopped this a long time ago, but somehow that didn’t happen and he doesn’t think it will any time soon.  
“Maybe I am,” Jason admits. “I’m inconsistent like that and things were different back then.”

“Because you thought it would be a onetime thing?” Dick asks. 

“Yeah.”  

“Did you want it to be a onetime thing?”

“The one after Ivy or the Ivy one?” Jason asks.

“Either?” Dick says.

“Yes, I wanted it to be a onetime thing, because I knew it would be different with you, Dick,” Jason answers. He’s still perched on the edge of the rooftop and he’s still suited up.

“So you repeat a mistake then, every time you touch me?”

Trust Dick to hit the worst part head on. Maybe it had been a mistake, but it doesn’t feel like one. “No,” he answers, finally jumping down from the railing and landing smoothly close to where Dick is standing. Dick smells like soil and living, growing things, faintly like strawberries, too. “Touching you could never be a mistake, Dick,” Jason adds.

Dick bites his lip. “I’m jealous,” he says.

“I know,” Jason replies.

“I can’t help it, but I know I am not enough for you, sexually,” Dick says looking Jason in the eyes. “I won’t ever be.”

“I know,” Jason repeats and wishes he could say that it doesn’t matter, but it does. But Jason doesn’t want for Dick to be unhappy, he doesn’t want for Dick to leave him either. “We can have rules for my hooking up.”

“Yeah?” Dick asks and he looks hopeful.

“Sure, we make our own rules for pretty much everything else too, why not this?”

“Okay.”

“Okay,” Jason says.

“Want to come in? Alfred sent cookies.” Dick asks turning to go inside and after a short pause, with a nearly coy backwards glance, “We both could use a shower.”

Jason follows.


	19. Der nächste Schritt

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like writing a lot of porn lately and that's why you get more Jayson/Dick. *hands*

**Der nächste Schritt**   
_(The next step)_

Dick wakes up slowly, burying his face into the pillows. It’s bright in Jason’s apartment, even in the late afternoon. Dick blinks as he feels Jason’s hard length against the small of his back. They had been too tired after patrol to do more than shower and fall into bed naked.  
He holds still and listens: Jason’s breathing is soft and even, hitting the back of Dick’s neck and shoulder in soft puffs of air. He’s still asleep. 

The thrusting against Dick’s back is gentle and kind of rhythmic. Dick wonders what the hell he’s going to do. It’s good and he’s getting hard, but…they haven’t done this yet. Jason doesn’t push it either. He is perfectly happy to use his fingers and tongue and Bluebird, of course. Dick likes it too. 

He bites the corner of the pillow as Jason thrust again a bit harder. They’re naked and every drag of Jason’s cock makes Dick shiver. Jason is leaking pre-come and Dick wants to reach back and feel it on his fingertips. He grabs the pillow instead, hard. He could wake Jason, or get up, but he feels pinned, trapped in that heat they’re creating, or Jason is creating…and maybe Dick wants to feel Jason come against his back and ass. 

Jason starts mouthing his shoulder gently and then a bit harder and then he bites down and Dick jerks, goes rigid, and bites his lip. Jason is awake a second later. Dick can feel him sitting up. 

“Shit…I’m sorry,” Jason says. His voice sounds sleep-warm and rough. 

Dick wonders if he was dreaming about fucking John. He doesn’t ask, such questions don’t belong here.  
“It’s okay,” Dick whispers, not turning to look at Jason. He can feel Jason’s gaze boring into his skull. And then Jason brushes his fingertips against the place he had just bitten. Circles it gently , leans in and blows on it. Dick tries to suppress a shiver and a moan. Biting the pillow again. 

Jason leans down and smiles into his skin, kissing over the shoulder blade and down, following Dick’s spine to the small of his back, the dip there where Jason’s pre-come is making a tiny sticky pool and licks it away.  
“There, all clean now…” Jason whispers. 

Dick is rock-hard by now. He grabs for one of Jason’s hands blindly and as he finds it he drags it over his hip and to his cock. Jason starts stroking gently and slowly. It’s good, Dick thinks, it lazy and warm. “You can…” he bites his lip and takes a deep breath. Jason is waiting, still stroking gently and running mindless patters on Dick’s back with his other hand. “You can…if you want to come against my back,” Dick says and then because that is not what he means he corrects. “My ass.” 

“I love your ass, Dick,” Jason says, getting comfortable behind him. Dick lifts his leg slightly to give better access and he bites the corner of the pillow again. “Oh,” Jason breathes. “You meant your hole…” Jason licks his shoulder again. “I want to be inside you so bad, Dick…you have no idea.”

Dick shivers with the first touch of Jason’s cock to his opening, he just nudges it gently and keeps nudging it, sliding against it and the delicate skin behind Dick’s balls. His fingers circle Dick’s length in a loose grip. He’s leaking, they both are really. Dick squeezes his cock and Jason’s hand speeds up.  
“Jason…” Dick breathes. 

“You. Are driving me insane, Dick. You know that right?” He squeezes just a bit too hard for Dick’s liking. Dick gasps and then moans when Jason mouths his shoulder and starts sucking in that way he likes sucking Dick’s cock. Hard and fast with a bit of tongue.   

“Jason,” Dick says again and Jason thrust hard against him and comes sticky wet against Dick’s ass. He’s panting and Dick is still hard. Jason has a firm hold on Dick’s cock and doesn’t let him move until he calms down again. 

Then Jason turns him on his back and grabs the lube with the other. “I want you to fuck me, Dick,” he says and he’s smiling down at Dick. Their hands intertwined around Dick’s cock, so Dick knows Jason can feel his cock jump at the thought, the image of being buried inside Jason. 

Jason opens the lube with his free hand and pours it onto Dick. Dick closes his eyes briefly. He doesn’t know…he doesn’t know, but he needs to come. Badly. “You’re too tight-”

“That’s a good thing,” Jason interrupts, stroking Dick gently. 

Dick moans. “I will hurt you.”

“Oh Dick…” Jason says and pushes two fingers inside himself. Dick closes his eyes again and only listens. “Dick…come on. Fuck me,” Jason whispers against his lips a few moments later. “I want it and I know you want it too…” 

“Jason-”

“And I’m ready now,” Jason cuts in. ”And starting to feel really empty,” he adds in a whisper that goes straight to Dick’s gut. Jason slides forward so Dick’s cock is nudging against his hole. Dick bites his lip. “Dick.” The word sounds like a plea. Jason won’t make him, he knows that. In a few moments he will slide away again and- And Dick doesn't want that.  
He wants to give Jason this. He wants to make Jason feel good like Jason always tries to give him everything and make him feel good.  
He grabs Jason's hips.  
“Yeah?” Jason asks. 

“Yeah,” Dick answers and lets Jason guide him. Jason is slippery, hot and tight. 

“You feel amazing, Dick,” Jason moans as he starts to fuck himself on Dick’s cock. Dick wants to tell him that he is the one who feels amazing, but he settles on watching the obvious pleasure Jason’s feeling. He lets Jason set the pace and rhythm, fighting his own fast approaching orgasm to give Jason more, to keep himself inside Jason’s tight heat a bit longer. 

“Jason-”

“You don’t have to hold back,” Jason interrupts.

“Okay,” Dick says and thrusts a bit harder and faster, meeting every one of Jason’s thrusts. And then Jason squeezes and Dick is lost as his orgasm washes over him. 

~+~  
Jason lights a cigarette, inhales and exhales slowly. Dick is staring at the mess between Jason’s opened legs. When Jason notices – and it doesn't take him long – he slips one hand down and between his legs to trace the path and grins at Dick.

“You’re happy,” Dick states like an idiot. 

“Great detective skills, Dick,” Jason jokes. 

“No, I mean,” he sits up and crosses his legs in the lotus-position. “You really enjoyed it. It makes you happy to be-”

“Fucked?” Jason supplies. Dick nods. “Yeah, it does. It's not for everybody, but I enjoy it and you,” he takes another drag, “You felt really amazing inside me, Dick. Was it good for you? Do you want to do it again?” 

“Yes,” Dick says because he had liked it and he wants to do it again. 

Jason reaches out and grabs his neck, pulling him closer, so their foreheads touch. He smells like sweat and cigarettes and his lips, when he kisses Dick, taste like smoke and salt. 

“Good,” Jason says. “Are you going to stay for breakfast?” 

Dick thinks about it. He should be heading back to New York, but... “Yeah.”


	20. Nach dem Regen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story/part/chapter was inspired by the amazing art I got done by [seigan_aurora/Emmy](http://batcheeks.tumblr.com/). Which you can also see here :) and another piece in [Birdland Beginnings](http://archiveofourown.org/works/771849/chapters/1448807)

**Nach dem Regen**  
 _(After the rain)_

Jason knows that Dick is very unsure about a lot of things. He doesn’t like to show it, because he still feels like he has to protect them, even if they are all grown ass men by now. Well, with the exception of Tim, but then Tim is wise beyond his years anyway. And he can, like all of them, take care of himself.

“Dick,” Jason says, because he can’t take the longing on Dick’s face anymore.

Dick turns to him and away from the birds, just ordinary birds, outside the window. “Yeah?”

“Take the freaking serum,” Jason says. “Or I will force-feed it to you.”

“I can take you, Jaybird,” Dick replies with a smile.

“Is that a challenge? Because I think I can pin you down and-”

“Have your wicked way with me?” Dick cuts in.

Jason groans. That is so not fair. The memory alone of Dick’s skin under his fingertips, the noises he makes, the way his hands clutch at Jason’s hips when they have sex.  
Dick smirks.

“Shut up, Dick,” Jason says.

Dick leans over and kisses his cheek and then he goes back to looking at the birds.   
Something has to be done.  
   
~+~  
Jason and Bruce are often on shaky grounds these days, even if Jason has no doubts that Bruce still loves him. Jason can understand, on some level, that Bruce feels betrayed by him, but he can’t help feeling how he feels either and he can’t help being who he is. One day, or so John keeps telling him, Bruce will see it and stop trying to change Jason – and drag him to the side of the angels.

“Master Jason,” Alfred says with a smile as he opens the door.

“Hey, Al, is he in?”

“Master Bruce is in the library,” Alfred answers.

“Thanks,” Jason says and dashes up the stairs.

Bruce is in the library alright, but so is John.

Jason leans against the door frame and enjoys the rest of the show. Fuck it all, but John looks fucking beautiful when he comes and seeing Bruce on his knees for (either of them) John will never get old, will never ever be not arousing as fuck. Jason is sure Bruce at least knows that he is there. John is too fucked out to care.

“A word?” Jason asks as Bruce pulls away and John opens his eyes. The urge to kiss him is nearly bringing Jason to his knees.

“Jason,” Bruce says. His voice sounds just a bit gravely. It does all kinds of things to Jason. 

He crosses over and grabs John by the hair. John smiles up at him from his sprawl in the big armchair.  
“Hey,” John says gently and Jason kisses him. Ravishes his mouth really and John lets him, because John always does.

“Hey,” Jason replies.

John smiles as Jason finally lets go of him. “So a word? With me or Bruce?”

“Bruce,” Jason says. “But you can stay.”

“Okay,” John replies. He is gorgeous and naked and his cock is still glistening with Bruce’s saliva. But Jason has a freaking mission. He can always come back later to ravish John some more or let Bruce fuck him hard.

“It’s about Dick,” Jason says.

Bruce nods. He probably knew that Jason would come to him again about this. “And the serum. Is he ready to try it?”

Jason thinks he is. “Yes.”

“Jason-”

“He was staring at birds for two hours straight yesterday. Two freaking hours, Bruce!” Jason explodes.  

“What do you want me to do?”

“Talk to him,” Jason answers.

“Didn’t you try that?”

Jason gives him a narrow look. “Of course I did, but he distracts me every time I try to talk about it.” John giggles.  
“Shut up, John,” Jason says. “As if you wouldn’t be distracted. As if he doesn’t turn you on beyond your wildest dreams.”  
John swallows. He’s probably thinking back to that time Jason and he had watched Dick get off.

“I’ll talk to him,” Bruce says. “I can’t promise anything.”

“I know,” Jason replies and then in a quitter voice, “Thanks.”  
   
~+~  
Jason has no idea what Bruce said, or how, or whatever, but the next week Dick and he are back at the manor and Dick is ready to try the serum. Mr. Fox is still working on it to make it last longer, and in Dick’s case to…Jason has no idea to be honest. Make the transformation less painful maybe.  
John is hugging the living hell out of Dick as Jason and Tim watch.

“Looks like rain,” Tim says.

“You love the rain,” Jason replies. “As does John.”

“Yeah…” Tim says. 

It’s not really a warm day, since it’s the beginning of autumn, but Tim is starting to strip anyway. They won’t feel the cold once they’re in bird form anyway. It’s only them here in the wilder parts of the gardens. Jason’s fingers itch to run his hands over Dick’s skin, peel his clothes away, kiss his collarbone and the insides of his elbows. He strips instead too. Tim is already in the air when Jason is done. He goes over to Dick and John and takes one of the small cups.

“Okay,” Dick says. His voice is firm.

John kisses his check and then just swallows down the serum. The change is smooth and soon John is joining Tim in the air. Dick looks at them.  
“Come on, Bigbird,” Jason says gently. “We can do it together.”

Dick smiles. “On the count of three?”

Jason shrugs. “Three,” he says and they take it. It’s a warm tingly feeling as his body transforms. He has no idea how it feels for Dick this time, but he will ask about it once they are back to their human forms again. He shakes his feathers and looks at Dick. Dick looks good and happy.

“You okay?” Jason asks.

“Yes, Jaybird, yes, I’m okay,” and then he’s in the air and Jason can only stare at him. He is magnificent. He has always been meant for this and only this. It takes Jason’s breath away watching Dick leap from fire-escapes and rooftops, but this is a whole other level of beauty.

“You coming?” Tim asks from above.

Jason blinks. “Yes!”  
   
~+~  
It’s like before. Racing Tim and John and playing tag with Dick in the air and Jason loves this. Has missed it beyond anything imaginable. He wants to do it every day, or at least every week. He wants to have a stash of this stuff at his apartment. He needs to talk with Bruce about it.  
He’s racing after Tim when the rain sets in. Tim finds nearby branch and spreads his wings wide. He tips his head back to catch droplets on his face. Little freak, Jason thinks fondly. John is excited as well and Jason wonders what it would be like to have sex with him in the light warm summer rain. He should really try that as soon as he can.    
The thunder and lightning make Jason’s heart jump a bit. He looks for Dick.   
Dick is already heading to where they are. John and Tim are sitting on the same branch close together. They look fucking adorable. The rain is falling heavier.  
He joins them and waits for Dick.

“I love this,” Tim says and he radiates happiness from every fucking pore and feather. This is them. This is them before all this bullshit had happened. Jason can’t regret everything, but he could have lived without some of it.

“Yes,” Dick says. He spreads his wing over their little heads as the rain falls even harder. Tim shakes his head and curls into John’s body.

Jason isn’t going to fuss about them. They aren’t fledglings anymore. Even if they look small and vulnerable right now. Dick of course can’t help himself. They will always be his. His to take care off, his to protect. Jason likes this about Dick. Loves it even.  
John sighs and closes his eyes. He looks like a fledgling right now. Small and cute and Jason feels tender towards him like this, like he rarely is when John is in human form.

“Come here, Jason,” Tim says.

What for, Jason wants to ask, but he knows what for and it’s a good day, so he joins them between the leaves and snuggles into their soft warm bodies and listens to the rain.  
   
~+~  
The rain stops just before Jason feels the telltale signs of the change. He flies smoothly down to the ground and is soon joined by John. Dick looks down at them.

“It’s wearing off,” John says. He stretches out as the change sets in.

“Mine isn’t,” Dick replies.

“Maybe it’s like mine,” Tim says. “You have to will it.”

Dick looks uncertain. Jason thinks it’s because he doesn’t want to change back yet. “You can stay like that. Enjoy the day. Fly around with Tim. Me and John, we’ll be fine,” Jason says. He feels his muscles coil and takes a breath, as he exhales he’s human again. Naked and high on endorphins. John’s arm brushes his and Jason bites back a moan.  
Dick looks away and then he’s airborne again with Tim hot on his heels. Jason watches them until he can’t see them anymore.  
   
~+~  
He fucks John on the wet grass fast and hard, with John clawing at his skin and biting at his shoulder and moaning his name again and again.  
Afterward he falls beside John and stares at the bits of sky visible through the leaves. John grabs his hand and holds on. His breathing is slowing down.

“It’s always such a rush afterward,” he says with a small laugh.

“Yeah,” Jason says and turns to kiss John’s cheek. “It is.”

“Are you going to stay?” John asks.

“Yeah,” Jason says, because he is. He thinks Dick needs a few hours or days to himself after this. And sometimes Jason misses the manor painfully.  
   
~+~  
It’s always a rush to have sex with Bruce. He can claw and be pushed down and restrained by Bruce’s bigger, broader body. He loves it, loves Bruce’s hands on his thighs, spreading his legs and pushing his hard hot length inside him. Loves when Bruce fucks him hard and slow and lets him bite his shoulder. Not too hard, but just enough. Loves knowing that John is there, watching, whispering, touching, because he can’t help himself. Knows that after Bruce is done with him Jason can just curl up with John like two birds in a nest and sleep. Spent and exhausted and sore in a good way. 

John kisses his face when he comes down from his orgasm and whispers his name and Jason turns to him, grabbing John’s hard cock and stroking him gently and too slow. Keeping John on edge. Sometimes he can’t have enough of the broken moans that escape John’s lips, the desperate movements of his hips and the way his fingers hold on to Jason so hard it’ll leave bruises. And all the while Jason is aware of Bruce’s burning gaze on them.

“Jason,” John says and it’s only a harsh broken whisper and Jason gets it. It’s too much, so he strokes in earnest, hard and fast until John comes with a cry. His body trembling with the force of it. They fall down onto the sheets, sweaty and messy and tired as hell. Jason curls into John and lets Bruce spoon against him, kissing his shoulder as Jason drifts off to sleep.


	21. Rotkelchen Ei

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Tim and Miss Carrie again \o/.

**Rotkelchen Ei**   
_(Robin's egg )_

Tim is staring at Carrie and he can't help it. She doesn't look different, but now that he knows -  
“Are you freaking out, Tim?” She asks, her hand stroking her flat, soft, pale stomach. 

“No,” Tim answers. He is maybe, because – it had not been planned like this. He’s only twenty. He can't even drink alcohol and – not that he wants to. He has school and the whole vigilante business. 

“You are,” Carrie says. 

“Aren't you?” Tim wants to know. 

She rubs her belly. “A bit, I guess? But only because I don't know if it will be like you or me.” 

“Me, it will be a shapeshifter, Carrie. Not only one of the bird-people, but like me,” Tim replies. 

“How can you be so sure?” 

“I’m one,” Tim says. 

“Yes, I know, but-”

“Dick and I were working on theories,” he cuts in. She nods, letting him know she is listening.  
“There aren’t that many shapeshhifters around, so we’re guessing, it’s a family thing. My mom was the shapeshifter. I think Dick’s, Jason’s or John’s kids would be human, because their parents weren't shapeshifters, but bird-people.” 

She gave him a look. “Dick?” 

“Okay,” he amends. “Maybe not. We’re not sure about Dick, okay? There is just so much we still don’t know about his – captivity,” he spits the word out and she reaches for his hand. She feels so solid sometimes, so real, and dependable, that he feels guilty for leaning on her. He’s the boy, he’s the vigilante, but – she would smack him over the head if she had known that he has such old-fashioned thoughts sometimes. He smiles. 

“Better?” She asks, kissing his forehead. 

Tim puts a hand on her hip and pulls her closer. “Yes, always,” he says. 

“You’re sure then, that our baby will be a bird-shifter?” She asks gently. 

Tim sinks to his knees and kisses her stomach, and then puts his ear to it. He can’t hear a heartbeat yet, but soon. 

“Yes,” Tim says, kissing her stomach again and then lets his lips wander lower and she puts her hands on his shoulder, spreading her legs. 

“We need to tell Bruce-”

“Later, after dinner,” Tim says and licks inside her. Carrie moans and Tim smiles against her wet pussy. He is going to take care of her now. It seems like the most important thing. 

~+~

It’s not really a surprise, that Carrie waits to tell him on a day she had known all his brothers and Bruce would be present. She loves them all and they love her. Miss Carrie has been a part of this family long before she and Tim became inseparable. 

Dick hugs him tightly, and Tim hugs back just as fiercely. Dick and Jason seem to have figured their shit out and that also means that John, Bruce, and Jason are better as well. Tim has no illusions that Bruce’s and Jason’s opinions on how to deal with the really bad criminals will ever change, but they’re still family. And lovers. 

“You’re looking good,” Dick says as they part. Tim’s hands are still lingering on Dick’s hips. “Even happier and I have no idea how that could be possible,” he adds with a laugh. 

Tim grins at him. “I’ll tell you after dinner, maybe even during or before.” 

Dick raises an eyebrow. His eyes are so blue, Tim thinks. He hugs Dick again just because. “I love you,” he whispers. 

Tim doesn’t have all the words, because there aren’t enough words to explain how much it means to be a part of Dick’s family. That Dick had taken him in, that he had cared for Tim, that he had cared for all of them. That he has provided for them, and had protected them from cats, and later from humans, and that he had loved them… loves them so much. 

“I love you too,” Dick replies. 

“Dick,” Carrie says, gently and Tim lets go and kisses her cheek. Dick hugs her then and his body stiffens slightly, and then he melts against her. 

“Ah,” he says. “I see.” And he’s beaming at her and then at Tim. 

Tim shakes his head. He has no idea how Dick had figured it out in the seconds he had Carrie pressed against him. But he’s Dick. Maybe it’s in her body language or scent or – something. 

“You see what?” Jason asks from the door. 

Dick turns to him, the love’s on his face, Tim thinks, is nearly ethereal, saintly. It’s hard to look away, but he does, because this is mostly for Jason only. 

“It’s a secret for a little longer, Jaybird,” Dick says. 

“Is that so?” Jason asks, he is in Dick’s personal space in a matter of seconds and then they’re kissing and Carrie grabs his hand and pulls him into the dining room. 

“They're probably going to get each other off in the closet or bathroom,” Tim says. 

She laughs. He kisses her. “We should do that,” she replies. 

He kisses her again. 

~+~

John is all smiles and wide gestures, and Bruce looks like he can’t believe how lucky he got. Jason kisses Bruce briefly, and they hug, and then they’re sitting at the table, and Tim is nearly exploding with anticipation. 

He doesn’t even make it to dessert. 

He grabs Carrie’s hand and squeezes. She nods. “Okay…”

Dick looks amused. Carrie winks at him and Dick laughs. 

“Spit it out, dude,” Jason says. 

“Okay, Carrie and I-”

“You want to marry her?” John cuts in, he sounds breathless. Tim hadn’t even thought about it that way. They are married in every sense that matters to him in his head. “Sorry,” John says, ducking his head. 

“It’s not about that, but of course, of course,” Tim says. “We’re having a baby.” 

There is silence for a brief second and then John is hugging Tim and Jason is kissing Carrie and Dick just beams at him. Tim looks at Bruce. 

Bruce is just looking at them. 

“We will need your help, Bruce,” Tim says quietly. “The baby will be like me.” But with the difference that this baby will have a family that loves him or her no matter what. This baby won’t ever be abandoned to wonder why. This baby-

“Of course,” Bruce says and gets up from his chair. “Of course, I am happy for you,” Bruce says and hugs him. It’s not awkward at all. Tim has never seen Bruce as his dad, but he has always seen Bruce as family and that will never change. 

“Thank you.” 

~+~

“Are you going to move out then? Once the baby is born?” John asks later in the library. 

“I don’t know,” Tim confesses. He hasn’t had time to think about anything at all. “I just – I’m going to be a father.” His voice sounds strange. He is in freaking awe. He will be a father. 

“And you will be great,” Dick says, pulling him close to the fire. He leans into Dick, staring at the flames. 

“Because I learned everything important from you, Dick.” 

“Don’t be-”

“It’s true. You took us in, you cared for us, and we know you would never leave us, not willingly, not for long-”

Dick kisses the top of his head. Tim sighs. He has never felt more like himself, as when he was with Dick – before Carrie that is. Now his whole heart belongs to her first – maybe. He isn’t sure, maybe he doesn’t have to be. Maybe he doesn’t have to measure these things at all. 

“This wasn’t planed, was it?” Jason asks. 

Tim shakes his head. “No, we kinda…she doesn’t take the pill, because it messes with her. We were out of condoms and we’ve been exclusive and-”

“You don’t have to tell me,” Jason smiles. “I know how you can be swept away by passion for the person you love,” and he’s looking at John and Dick when he says it. 

Tim smiles, snuggling closer into Dick’s warmth. 

“I am excited. I’ve always known it would be early for me, because Carrie is older. So…yeah.” 

“We are excited too,” John says. “A baby in the manor!” 

“We haven’t had that since you changed into human form,” Jason throws in, patting Tim’s hair. 

“Hey, I wasn’t a baby then.” 

“You will always be our baby,” Dick says. 

Tim doesn’t think it’s that bad. 

“Have you talked about names?” John asks. 

“No, not really.” 

“I’ve always liked Grayson,” Jason throws in. 

“For a boy, but what if it’s a girl?” Dick asks. 

“Cassandra,” Tim says, because it just comes to him. “I like Cassandra.” 

“She will be a kick-ass bird-lady,” Jason replies. 

Tim nods, he is sure she will be. 

~+~

They stay at the manor for the night and probably for the weekend too. Tim hopes that Dick and Jason will as well. They don’t see each other often enough. 

“Do you want to move in with me?” Carrie asks. 

“You could move in with me,” Tim replies, turning so he can look at her beautiful face in the dark of his bedroom. 

“Here?” 

“Yes, here. I know it’s a great place to grow up.”

“She would be able to run around naked and change at will here,” Carrie muses. 

“She?” 

“It’s a feeling. I dreamed about her, so I did the test,” Carrie explains. Tim kisses her, because he can’t help himself. How could he have gotten so lucky to find Carrie, to be with Carrie, to have her love him back just as fiercely, he has no idea, but he won’t question his luck. 

“Okay,” Tim says, he lets his hands wander under her shirt and she strains against him. 

She laughs. “We’ve already done it three times today,” she says. 

“Are you so-”

“Shut up and kiss me again,” she says. 

He will go down on her and – he has no idea why he can’t get enough of her taste, smell, feel of her skin. He thinks he could listen to her muffled cries of pleasure for hours. He wants to make her come for hours. “Tim,” she breathes and again and again and again as he pushes his tongue inside her, licking, and teasing her until she shudders and goes limp. Tim listens to her harsh breathing. 

“Come here,” she whispers.

She kisses him while she strokes his cock just the way he loves it when he needs to come badly. And then she laughs into his mouth. “I love you,” she whispers. 

He loves her too. So much it hurts sometimes, but always in a good way. 

“You want to marry me?” He asks, kissing her shoulder, and stroking her breast. 

“You want to make a respectable woman out of me?” She teases. 

“You are, you are,” he says. 

“We don’t have to. I know I am the only one you love. The only one you will ever love, Tim. How many women can say the same?” Not many, Tim guesses. “We don’t need it, but I think it will make Bruce feel better to have legal documents – of everything.” 

“Yes,” Tim says. “He wants you to be a legal part of the family.” 

“Something small then,” Carrie says. 

“I don’t know if Alfred can do that, or John for that matter.” 

“I love John,” Carrie says. “I love you all so much.” 

Tim kisses her shoulder again. She sighs and curls into him. “Sleep now,” Tim says. 

“Right back at you.” 

~+~

“So, will it be a baby or will it be an egg?” Carrie asks at breakfast. 

Jason snorts. 

“I’m serious here,” Carrie says. 

“If you were a bird, it would be an egg. Probably blue,” Dick answers. “But you are human, so you will have a perfectly fine and healthy baby-”

“Until it turns into a bird. A fledgling,” John cuts in. 

“Like I did,” Tim says quietly. 

She puts her spoon down and kisses his cheek. Her lips are sweet and sticky. “It’s a she,” Carrie says, looking at them all. “Our baby will be a girl.” 

“How can you know?” Jason asks. 

She shrugs. “I dreamt about her. She will be beautiful.” 

“Of that I have no freaking doubt,” Jason says with a grin. “Kid has pretty fabulous genes.” 

“Yes, she does,” Carrie says, looking at him. Tim feels like the luckiest man alive. 

“Dick can show her how to fly,” John says. 

“Shouldn’t her daddy do that?” Carrie asks. 

“Dick showed us how to fly. How to really fly – to borrow a popular phrase,” John grins at Jason here, “With grace and shit.” 

Jason groans. 

Carrie laughs and then pats her stomach. “I should make a nest for her anyway, right?” 

They all nod. “I’ll help,” Tim says. 

“I know you will. You will be a great dad,” Carrie says. 

“I had the best teacher,” Tim replies and looks at Dick. 

Dick smiles. His smiles come easier now and are nearly back to Dick before.

“She will be fine under Dick’s wing,” Jason says. “I turned out alright. Tim and John too.” 

“She won’t ever get sick,” John says. “Not in human form at least.” 

Carrie nods. “That’s good.”

“Everything will be fine, Miss Carrie,” Dick says. “She will be strong. Bruce will help with everything medical and then some. We are your family.” 

She leans over to grab Dick’s hand. “I know, Dick. Thank you.” 

“It’s our pleasure,” Dick says. “Will you take a break from being the stuff of nightmares for criminals while Carrie is pregnant? And what about school?” 

Tim hadn’t thought about it, yet. “I'm going to finish school of course. We still have time. Bruce will help me figure it all out. I think I’m going to cut it back a bit on the vigilante business. John can cover for me.” 

“Absolutely,” John says, smiling. 

“He’s only thinking about more ways to get Bruce hot and bothered while out there,” Jason throws in. 

“Jay!” John says. 

Jason laughs. 

Tim thinks he has the best family a boy could have. And his daughter will be loved by every single one of them.


	22. Eierschalen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More about Baby Cass and Burce and John.

**Eierschalen**   
_(Egg shells)_

John loves the easy way Bruce can just push inside him after Jason has fucked him nearly senseless. He loves how careful and gentle Bruce is regardless. He reaches blindly for Bruce. His arms are so scared and the muscles so hard. John loves him so much. 

Loves how Bruce spreads him out, how he can spend hours licking and caressing John’s body. How he sometimes mumbles words against John’s skin like: perfect and beautiful and soft. John loves the hard, gentle thrusts that rock his body, loves it more when Bruce’s arm snakes under him, so he can sit in Bruce’s lap while Bruce fucks him. Can wrap his arms around Bruce’s hard body and breathe into his neck, knowing Bruce will take care of him. 

Bruce’s thrust become faster and John lets out a sigh when Bruce finally comes. John’s hard and rubbing his cock against Bruce’s stomach, until Bruce takes the hint and gets him off. They fall into Bruce’s, their, big bed on their sides. 

“When did he even get to you?” Bruce asks. “I thought he’d be with Dick, in New York.” 

“Dick’s here,” John replies. 

“He’s often in Gotham, lately,” Bruce says, tracing John’s lips with the tip of his finger. 

John licks it playfully. “He wants to be close to his family.” 

“It’s because Miss Carrie is pregnant,” Bruce states. 

“Yes. We’ve never seen a birth like this. We don’t even know if there are any other bird-people around, Bruce. If you think about it, it’s really a miracle that Dick found us. All of us, here. In Gotham.” 

“He wants to protect her,” Bruce says. 

John takes Bruce’s hand in his own. “Yes, he wants to protect her. There are people out there who know about us, Bruce. There are people who are willing to do whatever it takes – but so are we.” 

Bruce kisses him. Gently, but passionate. “You didn’t answer my question.” 

John smiles. “Outside of town. On my way back here. We fucked over the bike. It was hot, hard, and glorious,” John replies. 

“He didn’t want to come home?” 

“Bruce, he loves us, but this isn’t his home anymore,” John says. “Have you even been at Jason’s place?” John doesn’t think so. Bruce has never even asked about where it is. John knows that he doesn’t need to. Alfred has all their contact information, but still. Bruce had been at Dick’s place for Phoenix’s sake and Jason lives closer to home. 

“He didn’t invite me,” Bruce answers. 

“What?” Because really, what? “You’re Batman, and besides I don’t think he will ever write you an invite on crème paper, Bruce. Why can’t it be enough for you that he loves you?” 

“He loves you too and Dick,” Bruce says. 

“Are you jealous?” John hadn’t even considered it. Not really – not like it could be a real possibility. 

“No,” Bruce says. 

John doesn’t think it’s that simple. “But you don’t like it. You don’t like sharing him. You don’t like sharing me – you,” John licks his lip. “You want what Dick wants. What Tim and Miss Carrie have.” 

Bruce kisses his nose. “It’s not going to happen. I can’t make you chose. I know you need Jason as much as he needs you. As much as he needs Dick.” 

“Right now, I think he needs Dick more than us,” John says. “Dick makes him feel tender. Dick makes him be tender,” he adds. 

“You like that side of Jason,” Bruce says. 

“Yes, but it’s not mine to have. I have his tender side when he is my brother. Not when he is my lover, and that’s okay, Bruce,” John says, kissing Bruce’s fingertips. “I have you to be gentle and careful. You make love to me.”

“But never to Jason. Not since that first time,” Bruce replies. 

“You miss that, don’t you?” 

“Yes, but he isn’t there yet.” 

“Visit him. See how he lives, see who he is when he isn’t naked and demanding you to fuck him harder or delivering justice, Bruce.” 

Bruce leans in and kisses him. “Maybe I will.” 

It’s really the only thing John can hope for. 

~+~ 

“Bruce wants to visit,” John says, looking over the new artwork at Jason’s place.

“He knows where I live, John.” 

“I think, he thinks he isn’t welcome here. You did invite Dick,” John points out. 

“I lured him in with a sex-toy,” Jason grins handing him a mug of tea. 

John nods his thanks. “Not sure if that would work with Bruce.” He bites his lip. He hasn’t brought it up to anyone, really, but he is curious about the toy. Toys in general. But somehow –

“Yeah, he really doesn’t seem the type to need toys to get off. And he has us.” 

“He’s not using us!” John says sharply. 

Jason kisses his cheek. “I know. I didn’t say that, did I?” 

“And I don’t think it’s about need with you and Dick, is it? It’s about fun, isn’t it?” 

Jason grins. “You’re curious about it.” 

John can feel his cheeks color. It’s stupid really, they have done so many crazy things in bed. There is no room for shame left, or shouldn’t be. He nods. He can tell him this. He can say it to Jason. Jason likes toys, Jason loves him. Jason – Jason grabs him by the neck and kisses him hard and then he slows down, makes it gentle. 

“I can’t use any of those I have here,” he says. 

“Oh-”

“They’re Dick’s. I bought them for Dick or with Dick-”

“What?” 

“Online. We did research…read reviews and shit. It was very scientific.” 

John has no idea why this blows his mind, but – Dick is shopping for sex toys with Jason and Jason doesn’t give him shit for it, or leers, or anything like that. 

“Jason-”

Jason shrugs. “He likes it. I like it. They’re all slim, he still doesn’t – I don’t know. He fucks me sometimes, never with toys.” 

John grabs his hand, intertwines their fingers. “He makes love to you. I know Dick. He makes love to you and you let him.” 

“Yeah, I just wish he would let me make love to him that way too,” Jason replies. “You should ask Bruce about toys, John. You’ve been together forever. You can just ask.” 

“It’s easier with you,” John admits. 

“I’ll come with. Make it an intervention – we can look up stuff online now,” Jason says. 

And with Jason it doesn’t feel weird at all. 

~+~

John is looking at Miss Carrie’s belly, which is slightly round already. She smiles. “She kicks sometimes. She will be a great ninja bird – like her daddy. Can you imagine? Daddy…” she whispers. “Doesn’t that sound just-”

“Perfect,” John says. 

“Yes, perfect,” Miss Carrie replies. “Want to feel her?” 

“I can’t-” John says. 

“Nonsense. You’re family, John. With all of these weird dynamics here, there is really no use in feeling shy.” 

He wonders if she’s thinking about Bruce or Jason. Probably both. He crosses over to where she’s sitting and puts his hand tentatively on her belly. The dress she’s wearing is soft and thin and he can feel the heat of her skin under his palm and then he can feel that small fierce kick. “Oh.” 

“Yeah, she’ll be a kickass bird lady alright,” Carrie laughs. “Won’t you, Cass?” 

“Cass?” John asks. 

She shrugs. “I like it. Cassandra seems so long. No one calls Tim, Timothy, either.”

“His father used to do that,” John says. Tim had confessed it once to him, shortly after they had to deal with Mister Drake coming back and wanting Tim to live with him. Tim never liked it. 

“Sometimes I wish they would’ve gotten along better, but I don’t think Cass will need a grandfather. Especially not one who abandoned his own son for being different.” 

“I am so glad you didn’t freak out on Tim,” John admits. 

“I was too much in love with him by then. I think I was in love with him when he hadn’t been legal – that makes me a horrible person, doesn’t it?” 

“No,” John says. “No, not for loving Tim the way you love him. He is happy. And he can only be happy with you.” 

She nods, stroking her belly again. “I’d like her to be the first of many children in this family.” 

“I don’t think any of us will be any use for that – maybe Jason, but I think it would hurt Dick.” 

“You and Bruce can adopt,” Carrie says. 

John feels too young for children, but Bruce is older than him and if they want-“I don’t know.” 

She strokes his hand. “I didn’t say now and maybe Cass will get a little sister or brother. I would like that.” 

“I think Tim would too,” John says. “You will be a great mom.”

“Thank you, John. I know all of you will be great uncles and love her as much as Tim and I.” 

“Of course,” John replies and kisses her forehead. He is really glad that she decided to stick around. Even after Tim told her about Batman and Robin and what they’re doing when they aren’t turning into birds. 

~+~

The Cave still gives John the chills in some ways. Mostly because it’s never really warm down there. He wraps his jacket tighter around himself and looks at Bruce who is pouring over new material. His cases are different from John’s, Tim’s too. He tries to stay on those that Jason is interested in. It’s a race between them. When Bruce wins, they’ll live; when Jay wins, they die.   
John thinks it’s too big of a burden on Bruce, but he can’t share it. It’s a burden that Bruce took on himself and isn’t willing to put aside yet. 

“I can feel you, you know, John?” 

“I know. That knowledge gives me the good kind of shivers,” John replies, stepping closer. They hardly make love down here. This is all work and no play, and John likes to be naked when he makes love to Bruce and the cold Cave just isn’t the place for that. Doesn’t mean he doesn’t like it from time to time to be pressed against the Batmobile or the console. Feels more like Batman is making love to him than Bruce. It's a thrill. 

“What is it John?” 

“Miss Carrie wants more kids. She thinks this is a good place to raise them. We were talking...” 

“About kids?” 

“I told her she and Tim are pretty much the only ones – but she said we could adopt,” John says. 

“I already have four boys,” Bruce replies, he pushes the files away and turns to look at John.  
“You're my son on paper.” 

“Sometimes, I think it gets you off,” John jokes. 

Bruce groans. Not in the good way. “Do you want kids?” 

John shrugs. “I never thought about it, but maybe, yes...I don't know. Would you want to adopt again?” 

“With you?” 

“Yeah,” John says. 

“Always.” 

“Oh-” John says. 

Bruce stands up and crosses over to him, takes his hands, and kisses his knuckles. “I love you, John. I want you to be happy.” 

“I want you to be happy, too.” John says, because he doesn't want Bruce to do things just to make John happy. 

“I am. You make me happy. You and Dick and Jason. Miss Carrie and Tim. Soon Cassandra.” 

“She's going by Cass,” John says. 

“She’s not even born yet,” Bruce replies. 

John kisses him. “I know. Isn't that awesome?” 

Bruce laughs. John kisses him again and slips him his tongue too. Soon he's pressed against the Cave wall. Bruce is all passion and heat and John wants to be naked, but he also wants to talk.

“John,” Bruce says. 

“Come upstairs with me, I'm sure this can wait.” 

“It can't. It never can when Jason is out there-” Bruce says. 

John sighs. “Another lonely night then?” 

“I'm sorry-”

“I was looking at toys with Jason earlier this week. For nights when you don't make it upstairs and I need some really deep pene-”

Bruce kisses him to shut him up. “Toys?” He asks as he frees John’s lips. 

“I got curious watching Dick,” John admits. 

“When?”

“Ages ago, actually, but I've been wondering.” 

“Aren't – isn't what we do enough?” 

“It's not about that. I know that for Dick it started out like therapy, but I also know that for Jason it's fun. It's all about having fun. They look like they would be fun. I mean some do. Not the scary ones,” John admits. 

“How long did you look at sex-toys?” 

“Hours,” John says. 

“Did you buy anything?” 

“I...no.” 

“But you wanted one?” 

“Or three...”

“Not the scary ones: What does that even mean?” 

“Nothing in black or that looks painful. Just...small things that are colorful and...vibrate...” John says in a whisper. He looks into Bruce's eyes. “I can show you? It doesn't mean I will like it or you, but I would like to try.” 

“With me?”

“Yes, Bruce. Who else?” 

“Jason,” Bruce says. 

“He offered, but if I try it, I want it to be with you or the both of you. I know that Jason can only be gentle in bed with one person and right now, that is Dick.” 

“You like it rough-”

“From Jason, yes, but not this – it's hard to explain. I'm trying, but-”

Bruce grabs him by the neck and pulls him in. By now John is shivering. It's not the cold down in the Cave that makes him shiver. “I'm glad you feel confident enough to try-”

“One of us has to be the brave one, Bruce,” John jokes. 

“You are, John,” Bruce says and adds smiling, “And what if I would like one in black?”

John swallows, thinking about it. “Something small then and not scary looking?” 

“God, John,” Bruce says, kissing him again and it’s with a bit more heat than before. “Go upstairs. I'll be there as soon as I can.” 

“Okay,” John replies and kisses Bruce gently before he leaves the Cave. He'll wait for Bruce for as long as it takes. 

~+~

“I'm terrified,” Tim admits with a glance at Miss Carrie whose belly is round and big. She's laughing at something Jason said or did. 

“You will be great, Tim. You will be the best dad,” John assures him. 

“I have no idea how to be a dad. I only know how to be a brother and a vigilante and-”

“You said it yourself, Tim. You learned from the best. Dick had no clue either how to be a dad. He – he just loved us how we were and he still does exactly that.” 

“So, you're saying I'm over thinking it, and I should just go with my feelings?” Tim asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“It's what Dick would do,” John says. “And that's what Dick will keep doing. He will love her no matter what. And us. You will make her feel special like you do with Miss Carrie. Like you do with us. Remember when you first came to live with us?”

“Yeah, I told you a story about Peter Pan.” 

“You can do that for Cass, Tim. Tell her stories, be there. Keep this city safe so she can walk home alone without fear.” 

“Jason will do that,” Tim says with a grin. 

“Yeah and he will scare away every single one of her boyfriends too.” 

“Like a good uncle and vigilante should,” Tim replies. 

“You will be fine. I know it.” He repeats and hugs Tim. “And growing up here, she can be whoever she is and stay naked as long as she wants to.” 

“I think Bruce will freak out if he should have a naked teenage girl around at all hours,” Tim smiles. 

“Probably. Does that mean you want to move out?” 

“No, we're staying here. Where we belong. At least until she turns ten or so,” Tim replies. 

John nods. “At that age Jason will have shown her all the cool moves and Dick how to fly and you,” he hugs Tim again, “How to change mid-jump.” 

“It's a cool trick, isn't it? But I always have to come back for my clothes...” 

John laughs. Carrie and Jason look at them and then wave them over. 

It's a perfect day as soon as Dick enters the patio. 

~+~

Cassandra is a tiny bundle with her mother's eyes. A dark brown, like good chocolate, and a mop of black hair. Tim's. 

She’s tiny, and tiny, and - “Tiny,” Jason says while he's holding her in his big arms. 

“Yeah,” John says. “Tiny.” 

“Tim isn't that big either,” Dick throws in. 

It's so weird, John thinks, how natural a baby looks in Jason's arms. Cass looks like she belongs there, like she would never ever want to be anywhere else. 

“I bet he hoped she would get the height from Miss Carrie, but body mass isn't everything. This one is feisty, I can tell,” Jason says. “I'll make her a real fighter.”

“She's a lady, Master Jason,” Alfred says. 

“She can be both. Is Clark finally here? I want to get to the good part of this name giving thing.” 

“The booze and food?” Dick asks with a grin. 

Jason grins back. 

Cass scrunches up her nose and John finds it adorable. Dick too, judging by the way he looks at her.   
“I leave you alone with my daughter and you are reduced to old ladies cooing at her...” Tim teases. 

“She will be a heart-breaker,” Jason says. 

“She better not start that until she's twenty-five,” Tim replies. 

Cass scrunches up her nose again. 

“I don't think she agrees and you can't throw the first stone here,” Dick says. 

“Master Clark has arrived,” Alfred throws in. 

John laughs. 

They name her Cassandra Violet, but everyone is aware she will probably only go by Cass for the rest of her life. 

Suddenly, he is fiercely glad that he had broken his wing so long ago. Glad that Bruce had found him and taken them in. Glad that Dick had taken care of them before that. 

“What's on your mind?” Dick asks. 

“Family,” John answers, looking at them. 

“Yeah,” Dick says.


	23. (Flug-) Angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which Dick lets Jason make love to him. 
> 
> So…this is the end. I am done with this story and don’t think there will be any more Birdland. Thank you everyone for the kudos and comments. I really enjoyed writing this. And it got me amazing art too \o/.

**(Flug-) Angst**  
 _Fear (of flying)_

“Isn’t it too early?” Miss Carrie asks. 

Cass isn’t even six months old, Dick knows, and Miss Carrie is right to fret. Thing is, Dick doesn’t know. All his brothers had been flying by the time Dick had picked them up. He had just shown them how to do it better. The only thing Dick can do is go with his guts and – “It feels right, Miss Carrie,” he answers. 

She looks from him to her daughter perched on the balcony railing. Dick thinks Cass looks as excited as he’s feeling. “You’re not going to shove her from the railing, are you?” 

“What?” Dick asks. “No.” He begins to strip. Cass is in her bird-form looking at him and he smiles at her. The change is less painful with the serum and smoother too. It’s still not completely painless but Fox and Bruce are working on it. It’s a pain he takes in stride and doesn’t even notice that much. The first change with the serum had been painless, but his body is adjusting too fast to it and treats it like something foreign that has to be dealt with. His anti-bodies are on high alarm. They have to change the formula every time just slightly. 

“Me and her, we will be fine, won't we, little bird?” Dick asks. 

She chirps and something inside him can translate it to human words. Or not human, but he can understand her. “She's talking already,” Dick says to Miss Carrie. 

“Talking?” 

“Chirping – but, it's a language. I bet she and Tim have long conversations about-” he listens to her. 

“Worms.” 

“Worms,” Miss Carrie says. 

“Yes, she likes beetles better, because they're crunchy. She likes the noise they make.” 

“I'll keep that in mind.” 

“She also likes how you smell and when you run your fingers gently over her wings,” Dick says. 

Miss Carrie beams at him. And Cass chirps again. “What did she say?” 

“That we should get a move on,” Dick laughs and then he hops onto the railing with Cass. He spreads his wings. She does the same. “She's fearless.” 

“Like her daddy,” Miss Carrie says. 

Dick looks at her. “Like her mother.” And then he takes off and Cass follows. He can hear her half breathless happy – terrified chirping and for a moment it seems like she will fall, but then Dick is beside her and under her and she follows his lead. Her chirping is still a mad mix of wonder and fear. Dick looks back. Miss Carrie looks like she's going to go crazy, she is grabbing the railing so hard, watching every one of their moves, every one of her daughter’s moves. Dick looks at Cass. Her wings are flapping madly. She is exhausted already. 

“We need to get back to your mom, Cass. She is worried.” 

Cass chirps again and Dick nods. Yes, they will do it again tomorrow, and every day after that until she's as good as him. 

Dick has no doubt that she will be at least as good as him. She seems like flying is the only thing that could make her happy.

Dick knows that feeling all too well. He also knows that it will change as soon as she finds the one person and falls in love. 

~+~  
Jason is waiting for him in his apartment, when Dick squeezes through the tiny window. He has been flying for some time now and he is high on adrenalin and the sheer joy of flying.   
Dick lands at Jason's feet. 

Jason crouches down and holds out his hand. Dick chirps and hops onto Jason's palm. 

“It's so fucking strange how freaking soft your feathers still are,” Jason says, stroking Dick's wings gently and carefully. 

Dick snuggles into the caress. He loves this. It's such a simple kind of pleasure. Nothing is complicated when Dick is in his bird-form, when Jason is, when they both are. It only starts to be complicated once both of them are human. 

Jason sits down on the floor and keeps stroking Dick's feathers. “You are always so happy when you fly, Dick. I can feel how madly your heart beats in your chest. It makes me jealous sometimes,” Jason confesses. 

Dick cocks his head. “Jealous?” 

“Yes, that something can make your heart beat so fast. The only other time is when we have sex,” Jason says with a grin. 

Dick doesn't sigh, even if he wants to. Jason has waited for him here because he knows what the change does to Dick. To all of them really. “Jason-”

“So, how good is our little bird-lady?” Jason cuts him off. 

“She is born to fly, Jason,” Dick says and then Dick rambles on about their little niece. He loves to tell Jason everything they've done. “She speaks of course.” 

“She chirps,” Jason corrects 

“It's your native tongue,” Dick teases. 

Jason kisses the top of his head and Dick sighs in contentment. 

“You're going to fall asleep on me in this form, aren't you?” Jason asks. 

“Yeah, I think I will. Will you stay?” Dick asks. He likes to wake up with Jason beside him. 

Jason kisses him again. “Yes, of course, Dick.” And then he gets up and carries Dick back to his nest of pillows and blankets and settles right beside him. Dick falls asleep to Jason's steady heartbeat. 

~+~  
Dick is snuggled close to Jason's body when he wakes up. Jason is in his boxers and t-shirt and Dick is naked. He must have changed sometime during the night. It happens sometimes. Usually, he wakes up from the change, but maybe this time he had been too exhausted. 

Jason is still asleep, but Dick knows that it won't stay that way for long. He takes the time to think about what he wants and why he's so afraid to just do it. He jumps from insanely high buildings and he – small, delicate Cass had just jumped into the joy headfirst. And she will do it again and again, even if she should fall one day. Dick just knows this. Why can't Dick do the same thing?   
He squeezes his eyes shut tightly. 

“Dick?” Jason asks, he sounds still half asleep. Dick loves the rough quality of Jason's voice in these seconds before he's fully awake. He wonders if Jason knows that.   
Dick turns to him, so he can bury his face in Jason's t-shirt. He had been dreaming about it and he had been thinking about it and he had been fantasizing about it too, when he had been pleasuring himself. Jason slings an arm around Dick and pulls him even closer. Dick exhales above Jason's nipple and Jason bites back a curse. “Are you-”

“Horny?” Dick asks into Jason's chest and then he leans in and sucks on Jason's nipple through his shirt. Jason rolls them, so Dick is on top of him. He keeps Dick's head pressed against his chest. 

“I think that was a stupid question,” Jason admits and then moans when Dick uses just the slightest bit of teeth. Dick kisses it and then sits up, and looks at Jason. Jason grins, leaning up so he can kiss Dick and Dick kisses back. It starts out gentle and soft, but becomes heavy and dirty fast. 

Dick can feel Jason getting hard in his boxers and why is Jason still wearing clothes anyway? 

“Excellent question, Dick,” Jason laughs. Dick loves this. This easy way they can just be. The way Jason can laugh, the way it's so much fun being naked with Jason. He has really no idea why he’s so afraid. Why he still holds back. 

Dick lets go of him long enough that he can push his boxers off and then he's on Jason again, shoving up his shirt and mapping Jason's chest with his lips and tongue. Jason makes those noises that make Dick crazy with – lust. It's lust, desire, a primal part of him likes this more than anything else – more than flying maybe. The rational part of him thinks flying and sex are pretty even. 

“I want-”

“Anything,” Jason says without even hearing Dick out, and Dick has to kiss him just for that again. 

“Lube, we need lube,” Dick says and leans over so he can grab it. He pushes it into Jason's hand and Jason doesn't even blink or lose time, he just opens the tube and slicks up two fingers. They've done this part, what feels like, a million times. Dick loves Jason's fingers inside him. On him too. He lifts up a bit and leans over Jason, so he can feel their cocks brush against each other as Jason finds his opening by feel and memory alone. He starts teasing with one, because he always starts teasing with one – even when they had progressed to toys. Dick doesn't want toys today. 

“Bluebird?” Jason asks, because of all the toys they have now, Bluebird is still Dick's favorite.   
Dick shakes his head and doesn't say 'just this', or 'just your fingers', because he isn't sure. Some time he had to lose the fear of falling. He just doesn’t know if it will be today. 

Jason kisses him, and it’s easy to fall into this. It’s so familiar, Jason under him, Jason’s fingers inside him teasing, and playing, and stretching, making Dick feel so good. Dick strokes every part of Jason he can; his sides, hips, and legs, runs his fingers over nipples and Jason’s neck, presses into Jason’s touch. 

“Can you,” he takes a breath, “Add your other hand?” 

Jason stops kissing him long enough to look him in the eyes and then nods and spreads Dick’s cheeks so he can worm another finger in. They’re up to four and it’s still good, different, but good and not scary at all. Dick is straining and leaning into it and he – he wants Jason inside him. Want’s Jason’s cock. He’s sweating and doesn’t know if it’s just the sex, or a little bit of fear or excitement. 

“Dick?” Jason asks, just a little bit concerned and Dick suddenly has no idea why he’s afraid at all. Jason knows him. Knows his moods, could even now see that Dick is thinking, debating, somewhere else for a moment. They’re in tune. He can trust Jason to know when to stop, even if Dick shouldn’t know. 

“I’m alright,” Dick says and smiles at Jason. “I really am fucking great,” and he laughs and leans down and kisses Jason and then he whispers against Jason’s lips. “I want you inside me.” 

“I am – oh,” Jason says. “Okay. How?” 

“Like this, can you just-?”

“Yeah, I can. Dick, fuck, anything you want, everything you want,” Jason says. 

Dick thinks that this should work just fine for him. He can see Jason this way, can have control over everything. And he needs it, at least for now, for this first time. 

It takes a bit of fumbling, but Jason is very patient and loving, coaxing Dick through the process of aligning Jason’s cock right with his opening and sinking down slowly. It’s – bigger than the fingers. All of them and different. Hotter somehow. But god, Dick decides. 

Jason laughs. 

“What?” 

“You were analyzing this, how it feels, just now you were doing that,” Jason replies. 

Dick nods. “Yeah.” 

“And?” 

“Good, full, hot,” Dick says rather breathless. 

“I think I can do better than that,” Jason replies and thrust just the tiniest bit. 

Dick clutches Jason’s legs and throws his head back. He knows how this works, knows that Jason can help him, doesn’t know if he needs or wants Jason’s help. “Come on Dick, this is more fun when I can help, like flying,” Jason says breathlessly. “We just have to find a rhythm.” 

“I can’t-”

“It’s alright, I’ve got you, come here,” Jason says and sits up, so Dick is in his lap, he slings his arm around Jason’s neck. “See? Now I can kiss you, while I fuck you,” he adds gently and Dick isn’t even tempted to correct him, tell him that it’s not fucking.

He kisses Jason instead while they’re finding a rhythm. It doesn’t take that long. It’s slow and languid and Dick loves that he can feel so much of Jason: in him and around him. Pressed against Dick’s skin. 

“I could do this for hours,” Dick says. 

Jason laughs. “Fuck, not today, not-” he thrusts up hard and Dick’s hands tighten around Jason. 

“You’re close,” Dick says. 

“Yeah. I’ve waited for this for years, Dick. I was close when I realized you wanted my cock inside you,” he admits and then he buries his face in Dick’s neck. Dick can feel Jason’s smile against his skin there. It’s easy to just let go then and let Jason press closer, Dick’s cock is rubbing against Jason’s stomach, pre-come, lube and sweat slick. It’s a sweet drag until Jason grabs Dick’s cock and starts stroking. “Not going to last much longer. Next time I’ll make it really good, Dick. I promise.”   
Dick thinks this is fucking fantastic already. Jason is jerking him exactly like he likes it and Dick is biting his lip to keep himself from screaming, that’s how good it feels. 

Jason comes first, but he doesn’t stop jerking Dick off until Dick collapses in his lap, too wrung out to do much of anything. 

They stay like that for a while, wrapped up in each other, until Jason’s cock slips out. Dick looks up then, just to meet Jason’s blown gaze. “It was good,” Dick says stupidly. 

“For you? For me?” 

“Both,” Dick says and kisses him again. 

“You want to do it again?” Jason asks. 

“Yeah.” 

Jason lets himself fall into the pillows and drags Dick with him. “Sleep some more?” 

“Yeah,” Dick replies and settles down on top of Jason, so he can listen to Jason’s heartbeat slowing down. 

~+~

“What changed your mind?” Jason asks as he steps behind Dick. Dick's been up for a while now. Letting Jason sleep in his nest of pillows and blankets. 

Dick doesn’t look away from his laptop. He’s seen the video at least three times already today, but he still – “I think I was just ready to see it.” 

Jason sits down next to him. He is still naked and covered in Dick’s dry come. It shouldn’t be a turn on, Dick things vaguely. 

“And?” Jason asks, there is tension in his voice. 

“I don’t see you differently Jason. I knew.” 

“You didn’t see,” Jason says. 

“I’ve watched it three times today and it’s – it’s not getting less horrible, but I am still glad you killed them all. After all this time, I am still glad you did it.” 

“I didn’t do it only for you,” Jason says, and it sounds like a confession. 

Dick nods, pausing the video. “I know. And that is what is making it right for me. You did it so these men couldn’t harm anyone else in the future. It wasn’t only revenge.” 

“Dick-”

“I still love you,” Dick cuts in, because it’s true. Dick is in love with Jason. 

“Sometimes, I think you’re too good for me, Dick, because you’re just this good person. Caring and loving. On some days, I know you’re too good for me.” 

“Don’t be stupid. You were the only one who even dared to address my issues. Who helped me get a grip on myself and my desires. You care about me.”

“Yeah, I do, Dick.” 

Dick nods and leans into Jason. He doesn’t need for Jason to tell him that he loves him too. Dick knows.


End file.
